Fully Vaccinated, AGAIN

Yesterday I wrote a long piece in which I listed 13 coronavirus lies and errors, plus one human rights atrocity, all of which were perpetrated by the establishment. This morning I took it down. I felt like the world didn’t need another angry blog post.

I hear phrases which I believe are from God, and two days ago, I heard one that surprised me: “This is a world of love.”

The world is full of true hate now. People who used to find each other merely annoying are now completely ready to put each other in camps and exterminate each other. So how can this be a world of love? I think I know the answer.

It has become very obvious to me that God’s children and Satan’s children experience the world differently. I often say we share the same planet but live in different universes. The children of darkness are losing their minds over politics and coronavirus, and so are many nominal Christians. Meanwhile, people who are close to God are much happier. Many are experiencing the best years of their lives. The years 2020 and 2021 were wonderful for me, and it looks like 2022 will be even better.

There is always symmetry in the supernatural. God and Satan. Jesus and the Antichrist. Magic, which is evil, and the supernatural tools of Christians, which are good. It makes sense that Satan’s children, which means all the people who are not involved with Jesus, would start experiencing hell on Earth while God’s children would start doing better than ever.

The day before the phrase came to me, I woke up and felt love flowing through me to God. This is something for which I have been praying for years. When Jesus visited me, his love bombarded me as though I were standing next to a heat lamp, and I believe I’m supposed to radiate love, too. Sometimes it flows, and sometimes it doesn’t. I’m not Jesus. When I feel it flowing, I try to hold onto it and make it last. I stayed in bed for a couple of hours.

The Revelation says a spirit of murder will be released on Earth during the apocalypse, and it’s already here. It has been at work for several years. If that is true, then surely God will counter it by pouring love through people who can carry it.

So it should be a time of love for Christians who keep praying for correction and deliverance. Meanwhile, it’s a time of hate for people like Howard Stern, who is so afraid of death he says people who won’t accept vaccination should go home and die. It’s a time of hate for a lot of leftist celebrities, as well as leftist Tweeters who make fun of unvaccinated people who get sick and pass away.

The apocalypse is a centrifuge. It separates darkness from light.

I think what I heard came from God. I get tired of being provoked. Many times, I have removed my own remarks from the web. I would like to become a constructive force.

Speaking of vaccines, I got a booster today. We are inundated with disinformation and misinformation, so sometimes it is not possible to make intelligent decisions about coronavirus. I made the smartest decision I could.

I hate the lies the establishment has told us about strategies for fighting the disease. I am also very critical of the vaccines. They are not good at all. They do a very poor job of preventing infection. They do nothing at all to prevent infected people from spreading coronavirus, although somehow, many Americans have gotten the baseless impression that they do. They don’t do a good job of preventing deaths among high-risk people. On top of that, credible research suggests mRNA shots damage DNA. There are a couple of worthwhile benefits to shots, though.

First, they make it considerably less likely that certain people will have severe symptoms. This seems to be true, although one wonders what they will tell us tomorrow. Some people get vaccinated and boosted and die anyway, but it looks like shots save some lives. Now that I have a wife, I feel obligated to try to live. Not that I was excited about the prospect of dying with a tube down my throat. As I have often said, give me a meteor strike to the head any day. Second, boosters shut the covid police up and make life easier for those who comply. It’s less of a hassle to get on a plane or cross a border, for example.

Third, I guess, if you’re up on your shots, people are less likely to celebrate when you die. That’s a depressing truth. The link I just posted goes to a story about Meat Loaf’s new detractors.

A lot of leftists are making fun of Meat Loaf because they think he died unvaccinated. They’re saying, “Now we know what he wouldn’t do for love.” They’re putting variations of this unclever remark next to their real names on Twitter, which shows you how much progress the spirit of murder has made. Imagine being proud of being cruel to the family of a person who just died. Isn’t that what made leftists hate the Westboro Baptist Church?

I got the shot mainly for love. Interesting parallel. Meat Loaf may have gotten it, too. The buzzards and hyenas tearing at his body don’t know; they’re just assuming he didn’t because he was against mandates. He was old, overweight, and severely asthmatic, so he may have been in the huge group of people shots and boosters do not help at all. Maybe he took two or three shots and still died. I don’t think leftists like hearing about it, but that happens a lot. They like to think they can protect themselves, but they’re fooling themselves. Some people can reduce the risk by taking shots. For others, nothing works.

I don’t trust the mRNA shots, so I got another J&J shot. I believe it is likely to provide some protection in the unlikely event I get Delta, which is very rare now. I believe it may possibly provide some protection if I get Omicron, which is everywhere. I know there is a blood clot risk from the shot itself, but it’s very low, and I already beat it once.

The one thing I’m sure the booster will do for me is this: it will make traveling to Ireland less of a hassle. Ireland does not require vaccines now, but if you’re vaccinated, you can go there without taking a PCR test. These tests give false positives, and they can also be inconvenient. It’s best to travel between Wednesday and Friday, because you may have trouble getting a PCR on a weekend. If you take your test on a Monday or Tuesday, things will go more smoothly.

It is unlikely that I would have a problem getting a test result early in the week, but I might.

Why would I need a test if I’ve already had the shot? Because by Ireland’s standards, I was unvaccinated until this afternoon. To be exempt from testing, you have to have had your last vaccine shot or booster within 270 days of travel. My vaccination was a long time ago.

Rhodah and I are hoping to meet in Ireland soon, so now we have one less thing to worry about. Assuming I don’t die from blood clots. THE SCIENCE says the risk disappears after 28 days. Hope that’s true.

We chose Ireland because the rest of Europe is convinced I want to move my wife from inexpensive Zambia to an expensive country, permanently. They think she will never leave. I’m not sure who they think will pay her bills if she moves to France or Switzerland. Not me! If I was going to move her, I would put her in Turkey or the Dominican Republic. I wouldn’t send her to a place where breakfast costs $20.

Rhodah went to the Irish Embassy in Lusaka, and they were extremely kind to her. She met the ambassador. They said they would get her in. Ireland is a slam dunk, and tourists give it raves, so Ireland it is.

Now we just have to motivate ourselves. We have gotten very complacent. We talk on video chat all day, and our lives are easy.

I wonder what, if any, side effects I’m going to have. Last time, I seemed to feel a little tired after the shot. I don’t remember any other problems. I was almost unable to feel today’s shot, but my arm started hurting afterward, which is weird. By the time I got in the car, it was over. I walked right out after the shot. No waiting period. Remember when they used to make us wait, to see if we would faint or something? Not any more. No one cares. We’re over it, I guess. I didn’t even get the information sheet my consent form said I had received. I checked the box that said I had received and read it, and they didn’t bother giving it to me, because no one cares any more.

I wasn’t excited about getting a booster, because I believe it’s extremely likely they will start using mandatory boosters to control us eventually. I don’t want to get in the habit so I’m afraid, after too many authoritarian strings are attached, to stop taking the shots. I prayed about it, though, and I felt God was telling me to go ahead. The mark of the beast may involve vaccinations, but it’s not here yet.

Now if I get sick and die, I’m going to start a Twitter account while I’m expiring, and I’m going to needle celebrities who said I was going to be safe.

Okay, I won’t do that. But it’s a funny idea.

Folly is Set in Great Dignity, and the Rich Sit in Low Place

Today I offered a friend of mine some advice on getting rid of mice, and she did not want to hear it. She let me know I was not to bring the subject up any more.

Why did she respond this way? Because the thought of killing mice bothers her. That got me thinking about the way the authority structure works in God’s kingdom, so I thought I might write a blog post that could be helpful to other people.

Of course, we are supposed to kill mice, as well as other creatures. It’s one of the less-pleasant obligations of life. God is 100% behind killing other living things under certain circumstances. In fact, the ancient Jews were obligated to kill all sorts of animals every day. Veganism was not an option; it would have been an extremely sinful lifestyle under the Jewish law. Cain was cursed because he tried to sacrifice plants instead of killing animals. God has always required blood as payment for sin.

Jews were also obligated to kill certain types of people, although that’s a different subject. The law doesn’t say, “I suggest thou kill witches.” It says, “Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.” God required the Hebrews to take cities and kill everyone in them, including babies.

The Jews suffer and die to this day because their king refused to slaughter every last Amalekite. He was nice, though. He was nonconfrontational. You have to give him that.

The King James Bible says, “Thou shalt not kill,” but in Hebrew, it prohibits murder, not killing. Murder is illegal killing, and not all killing is murder.

God put us in a world where we have to do harsh things sometimes. He did this so we would understand what it’s like to do harsh things. Our sins made it necessary for him to permit great suffering in the world, and they make it necessary for him to put people in hell, so we need to know how it feels to do harm when we do not want to.

To get back to animals, our grocery stores are full of their body parts, we wear their skins, we ride them, and we test drugs and other products on them. No sane person ever runs to the altar and begs forgiveness for eating a Slim Jim, not that I’m positive they contain meat, but you see what I mean. If it’s okay to eat a steak, it’s okay to step on a live mouse, which I have done.

A century or so ago, nearly no one had qualms about squishing bugs, trapping rats, or shooting pest animals. As people moved into cities and forgot what life was really all about, many human beings developed unhealthy concerns about the welfare of animals, to the point where, in their minds, animals became more important than people.

It’s sick and evil to set animals above people, and it leads to some crazy behavior, such as animal hoarding. It can drive people to deprive others of the consideration God expects them to give, in order to spend their time helping animals.

I know a lady who keeps unwanted animals in a barn, at the expense of a person who would much prefer not to support them. Knowing a tropical storm was coming, she chose to cut dangerous trees around the barn, but she left trees in place beside the home where her grandchildren lived. The barn was unscathed, but the home was destroyed by an enormous tree and had to be replaced. There is no way to justify that kind of perversity and self-righteousness. The animals should be sold, given away, or killed. It’s that simple. Given the chance, I would shoot them all in the head if it was the only way to spare the kids another episode of homelessness.

Here where I live, the Humane Society has a thrift store, and the Salvation Army has one right next to it. I went to donate things, and I found that the Humane Society’s store was huge and stocked with expensive items. The Salvation Army’s store was small and poorly stocked. That’s disgusting and wrong. It made me angry. God will judge the people who drove past a Christian organization that helps addicts and the homeless in order to donate money to help stray animals, most of which should be gassed humanely and cheaply.

There is a hierarchy in the universe. God is on top. Human beings who belong to him come next. Animals and demons are below us. If animals have too much priority in your life, you are also subordinate to demons and Satan.

I often tell a story about my sister and a dog I used to have. This dog was very submissive to almost everyone. He had no respect for my sister, however. She hated authority, especially when males were involved. She hated masculinity itself. She liked palling around with homosexual men. They were little nonthreatening men who were easily commanded, so they made her happy.

She could not submit to our parents and grandparents. She was extremely disrespectful to all of them, even when she was sponging off them and could be turned out into the street at their whims. Which happened more than once.

She had a habit of obtaining small dogs and spoiling them. She made them unbearable to other people. She didn’t housetrain them; they did their business wherever they happened to be, including on beds and couches. She bought them rib eye steak from Whole Foods. When she entered a room, the dogs got what they wanted, and everyone else in the room had to submit and suffer or deal with my sister’s tantrums and torrents of abuse. The dogs ruined floors and carpets.

The dogs had authority over her. She loved evil, she served Satan, so the authority structure was inverted in her life. Satan was at the top, then came demons, then came her dogs, then came her flesh, and then came the people she and her dogs made miserable.

My father, my mother, and I killed some of her dogs and turned one loose. I took one to be euthanized, and so did my mother. She took two, actually. She claimed a mean, untrained poodle got sick and didn’t make it, but in reality, he got an injection and blessed us all by expiring. One of her dogs bared its teeth at my dad at the front door of the house, so he stepped aside and invited it to leave, which it did.

My dog treated me with deference, but he considered himself dominant over my sister.

One day he entered a room where my sister was sitting. He climbed on the couch next to her. He put his feet up against her. He shoved her onto the floor. Then he stretched out in comfort. That’s what he thought of her. He knew she was a loser. He saw something people could not.

If you’re always looking after animals and putting their needs first, you have made yourself subordinate to them. If you’re subordinate to them, you also lack authority over your flesh and demons. You will be subordinate to evil people who don’t know God. You will always be pushed around.

When I see a spider or roach, I kill it. I don’t run for a paper so I can scoop it up, gently deposit it outside in a sunny spot, and pat myself on the back. The other day, I trapped a female coon in my yard. Coons kill livestock and pets, and they spread rabies. I stuck a pistol through the bars of the trap and shot it in the head, and then when it stopped jerking, I threw it over the fence to rot. I shoot squirrels, which damage my property, and throw them into the woods. I poison all sorts of bugs.

I have used glue traps for mice. Sometimes the mice were still alive when I got to them, so I stepped on them to kill them in a hurry. I didn’t like the suffering glue involved, but I thought glue traps were the best type, so I used them. I found that plastic snap traps were better. I use peanut butter to glue smelly anticoagulant rat bait to the traps. When I find a dead mouse, I flush him down the toilet, remove his dried blood from the floor, clean the trap, and start over.

Animals don’t push me around. I’m like Redd Foxx, who said he would run over Bambi if he got in his way. I am better than an animal. I am more important. I love animals, but I also know my place in the universe, and I want to keep it. I don’t want to offend God by discounting my importance and disregarding his right to establish hierarchy.

Under the right circumstances, I won’t hesitate to kill a pest animal that has legal protection. I don’t care how sacred it is to tree-huggers. Good luck catching me out here. Some laws are stupid.

I used to be on the bottom in life. Unpleasant people used to push me around. I had to work with them. I dated them. I tolerated things no one should tolerate. I couldn’t get free. It was humiliating.

When I started putting God first and praying in tongues every day, I started to get promotion. The Bible predicts this. It says promotion comes from God.

When I was away from God, I was putting God at the bottom, whether I realized it or not. When I put God at the bottom, I put Satan at the top. You worship God or Satan. There is no third choice. You may think you worship another God, or that you worship nothing, but if God is not your god, you are a worshiper of Satan.

Because I put God at the bottom, he was not there to lift me above Satan, demons, lower creatures, and rotten people. I was not part of God’s organization, so when I asked him for help, it was as if I worked for Apple and called Bill Gates for help. He was not interested. When you choose your god, you choose the one you go to for help.

Over the years, I have been exalted a step at a time. The people who used to make me miserable are gone. I don’t have a single one left in my life. I never hear from my sister, for example, and I will never tolerate involvement with her again. I would let her live in a refrigerator box before I would be involved with her and subject myself or my wife to abuse. I live in a Christian area. I don’t have to work for a godless boss. I don’t have to walk past gay parades and BLM terrorists to get groceries. I don’t have to wear a mask or hide in my house. I don’t have problem neighbors. I have no creditors.

If you’re giving animals inordinate consideration and honor, your life is in grave disorder. This is especially true if you set them above your spouse or children. It’s a terrible sin to make a person suffer so an animal can do better than it should. If you teach your kids to coddle roaches and mice, you also teach them people, many of whom are sons and daughters of God, are not as important as vermin. You teach your kids they, themselves, are not important or obligated to respect God’s hierarchy.

Mice and rats carry things like Lyme disease, hantavirus, leptospirosis, plague, salmonellosis, and rabies. Some people hoard dogs and cats. Well, they carry lots of diseases, including coronavirus (which rodents also carry). There are people who suffer from the delusion that spiders are our friends, so they never kill them. Nearly any kind of spider will bite, and they cause huge, pus-filled boils even if they’re not poisonous. Happened to me twice.

It may be unpleasant, doing your duty and putting animals beneath human beings, but it’s still your duty. Animals were not created in God’s image. Exalting an animal above a person is an insult to God. God isn’t going to pat you on the back in heaven and congratulate you on leaving your fortune to a cat shelter; he will be very displeased if you do something like that. For $350, you can move a starving Jew to Israel, permanently. You can give money to World Relief and send African girls and boys to school or buy them Bibles or vaccines. In view of facts like these, it will be hard to explain your cat resort in the throne room.

It’s extremely important to recognize and correct an authority inversion in your life. Authority inversions show that you are disrespecting God and that you live a life of abasement and defeat.

If you are on the bottom in life, something is wrong, and it’s not okay with God if you tolerate it. You are supposed to be on top. I’m not saying everyone is supposed to be rich and in charge of other people. I’m saying you shouldn’t be pushed around every day. Horrible people should not run your life. You should be able to cast out demons without much difficulty. Your prayers should get answers. You should receive healings. You should be serving God, and he should be exalting you.

What if you were in the army, and you were a major, and you decided to let privates tell you what to do because you wanted to be popular or you just were not a confrontational person? What would happen if a general showed up and saw you doing their laundry and cleaning their latrines? Would he be understanding? He would relieve you and have you charged with dereliction of duty. Someone else would get your job. When you’re appointed to a position of command, you are required to lead and make tough decisions. It’s not optional. We have to kill mice and rats. We have to put human beings above animals. We have to rule over demons. We don’t get to decide what we will and will not do.

This information can be very helpful to people who can’t figure out why they’re losers. If you can’t win, put God first. Get baptized with the Holy Spirit. Confess, confess, confess. Repent. Pray as much as you can. Ask for correction and treat it like the treasure it is. Become a warrior who defeats demons. Help other people. God will exalt you sooner or later. He won’t leave you on the bottom if you put him on top.

I was a loser, so I know what I’m talking about. Now I win, win, win. God gave me a wife who is a winner, too. She made mistakes, her life went badly, and she got back on the path. We do spiritual warfare together every day. We get revelation. She has visions which turn out to be true. I have dreams that guide me. We are one because we submit to the Holy Spirit as well as we can.

We don’t have to suffer in miserable workplaces where we are taught to fall on our faces before sexual perverts and entitlement junkies. We don’t live among hostile people who vex us with their trashy ways. God did all this for us. We used to lose, and we deserved it, but now we win, together, under God.

My wife is a real treasure. She has exceeded my hopes in every way. I’m so glad I didn’t marry a neurotic American woman with a bridezilla complex and misandry issues; they are very common. I’ve known lots of women, and I can honestly say the thought of being chained to any of them is repugnant now that I know what a real wife looks like. I thought some had potential, but now I know they were snares.

The productive marriages I am familiar with can be counted on the fingers of one hand, but I have seen dozens of scary marriages.

My wife and I are a team, together with God. He is helping us to improve, every day. We don’t have power struggles. I don’t have to worry about her having a fit because I didn’t recycle something or because I couldn’t care less about my carbon footprint. I don’t have to apologize for voting for Trump; she is with me all the way on that. She doesn’t scold and try to correct me like a typical American woman. She doesn’t have gay friends or bitter female friends I have to humor and accommodate. I have no mother-in-law trying to suck the joy out of my life.

Rhodah isn’t a dead weight or an adversary in my walk with God. Whenever I share a revelation with her, she chimes in and completes it with revelation of her own. She maintains her relationship with God because she wants to; I am not the driving force.

When I was a loser, I was not fit for a daughter of God, so I kept running into women who were losing, too. When I put God on top, he changed me so I would be an asset, not a liability. After that, he had an incentive to help me marry well, and look what happened.

I know she reads my blog. Good! She needs to know these things so she will be encouraged. We are one, permanently. Doesn’t matter if praising her bothers other people. She is my flesh, and they never will be. No other person will ever have the special position she has in my life. In comparison, even my best friend is an outsider. I will side with her against anyone but God.

I’ll give you an example of how authority works. A kitten showed up in my wife’s house. It seemed very nice. My wife took pity on it and gave it some food. It decided it loved my wife, because cats love everyone who feeds them. It would dart into the house when she opened the door, so she had to throw it out. It rubbed against her ankles. Did she decide she had to be the cat’s mother? No. She said, “I don’t want a cat.” Period.

She started giving the food through someone else so the cat would not associate it with her. I told her to make sure she didn’t touch the food, so the food would not smell like her.

We were concerned about the cat’s future, and it was also getting on our nerves, so we prayed for it. A couple of days later, the security guard where she lives took it home to his family. Problem solved. The cat didn’t make my wife a slave, because my wife is better than a cat, but the cat still got what it needed. It is no longer our headache.

There was nothing we could do for it in the natural. You can’t bring a cat from Africa to the US, and she didn’t want the cat anyway. Things worked out great.

One nice thing about Africa is that they know the difference between an animal and a person. Dog sweaters and boots will never be big sellers there.

When you put God on top, he puts other creatures beneath you. He defends you from manipulation.

I hope this material helps people. If you feel beaten down, and you can’t understand why you can’t get away from people who ruin life, you need to put God first so he can put you first. Don’t believe the garbage about God giving people “grace” to live contentedly as punching bags. That’s not what the word “grace” means. If you live a life of defeat, it’s because you LACK God’s grace. “Grace” means supernatural help, and God has repeatedly promised his children they will be the head and not the tail.

Proud people may read this and think, “Just you wait. You are lucky, so you don’t understand. Wait till it happens to you.”

It already did happen to me. Defeat was my lifestyle. God showed me the way out. You can have relief, but if you prefer to hold onto unprofitable ideas, you certainly may.

Doctors Reluctantly Admit What Bright Children Knew a Year Ago

Meant to publish this earlier in the week.

As a man with a spousal visa application pending, I am always interested in coronavirus news. Today there are some interesting stories.

First of all, I guessed wrong when I said Omicron should be pretty much over with by January 15. I based that guess on what happened in South Africa, but the US and other countries are taking longer to recover. It’s now looking more like the first week of February.

Okay, I still did very well for a layman who bases his predictions on a few skimmed news articles. About 10 days ago, “experts” were still making it sound like the world had ended.

It also looks like people all over the world are going into Florida mode. Even the timid, self-emasculated government slaves known as Australians are being allowed to socialize more normally. Some of them are, anyway. Kansas City has abandoned its unrealistic contact-tracing program. Israeli doctors are admitting we are not seeing a “pandemic of the unvaccinated,” saying the difference in the infection rate between vaccinated and unvaccinated people is miniscule. They’re also expressing surprise that vaccines didn’t end the pandemic. Some places are abandoning vaccine passports.

How surprised should we be?

The pandemic can’t go away through vaccination unless we have great vaccines or cures and nearly everyone uses them, forever. A couple of years ago, I thought our vaccines could work, but that was before I knew something everyone ought to know by now: dogs, cats, rodents, deer, hippopotamuses, and, presumably, all sorts of other animals are infected. People who don’t think clearly are asking whether they can transmit the disease to humans. If interspecies transmission isn’t possible, how did deer get it? Of course it’s possible.

If every person on Earth were magically cleared of the virus this minute, the pandemic would come back soon, because animals would give it to us. We can’t vaccinate all the deer. We’re not going to vaccinate all the dogs. It’s not just an epidemic; it’s a panzootic.

We were able to get rid of smallpox because we didn’t have to worry about vaccinating the entire mammal population of the world, and because the vaccine was good. Now we have a bunch of crummy vaccines and at least billions of carriers we can’t cure or prevent from spreading the disease. On top of that, there is no reliable cure.

A CDC page says this: “cats, dogs, bank voles, ferrets, fruit bats, hamsters, mink, pigs, rabbits, racoon [sic] dogs, tree shrews, and white-tailed deer can be infected with the virus.” Hamsters are being euthanized because they are susceptible, so that means rats and mice are carrying it, too. Have I seen proof? No, but come on.

In late 2020, CNN made the patently stupid remark that infection was rare in animals, as though it were meaningful. They should have known that if some animals had it, others were going to get it. Maybe animal infections were rare back then, because the pandemic was young, or maybe there hadn’t been enough testing to reveal the full extent of the problem, but here’s the remarkable fact CNN overlooked: contagious disease case numbers grow over time.

I am not at all reluctant to suggest that CNN’s people didn’t understand this, even though it’s the single most obvious fact about contagious diseases. It’s what “contagious” means. Journalists are incredibly dumb about science. They are just not bright. It’s terribly unfortunate that we rely on a body of unintelligent people to give us information about anything.

Scientists are defending their vaccines, pointing to other shots that have low efficacy rates. Flu shots, for example, often miss the mark. Supposedly, this means our covid vaccines are okay. Their defensive arguments are clearly wrong. The smallpox vaccine has a no-infect rate of 95%. The polio vaccine is 99% effective. Indisputably, there are such things as good vaccines. Covid vaccines have a no-infect rate not far from zero, which, by any reasonable scientific standard, is not high. The best you can reasonably hope for after being vaccinated and boosted is that when you get sick, you won’t have severe symptoms, and they can’t even guarantee that. They used to tell us severe cases were impossible for the once-vaccinated, and a couple of months down the road, they sang a totally different tune.

Right now, there are only two intelligent reasons to get vaccinated. 1. To shut people up so you can get on with your life, and 2. to provide a significant but not huge increase in your chances of avoiding severe symptoms such as death. With Omicron’s dramatically decreased severity, reason 2 is getting weaker by the second. Unless you’re a cast member on My 600-Pound Life, Omicron is not likely to do you in.

A 40% efficacy rate for a flu shot is not terrible, because the flu is only rarely a serious disease, it almost never amounts to a national or global crisis, and we get a new flu (or flus) every year, so if one year’s vaccines aren’t great, there is always next year. An ineffective coronavirus vaccine armory is much worse. Coronavirus isn’t going away at the end of every year, and unlike the flu, coronavirus has disrupted civilization.

Unless the virus decides to keep getting less dangerous until the end of the world, the only answer to our problem is a really good vaccine or cure. We will continue to be exposed to covid forever, so as long as new Delta-like variants remain possible, we need something that reliably prevents severe symptoms.

All the vaccines stink. Drink that in. They stink. It’s probably a good idea to take a non-mRNA shot if you’re fat, sick, or old, but don’t expect the moon. If you squeak by with a really bad week of fever, aches, and other problems, you are doing as well as you can reasonably hope to.

If you take an mRNA shot, you have to worry about the DNA damage credible researchers say mRNA shots do, so you could be replacing a minor problem with a major one. I might conceivably take a Johnson & Johnson, Astrazeneca, or Novavax booster, but I have no interest in something that prevents my cells from repairing mutations.

The medical establishment is amazing. They try to ram antioxidants down our throats because they prevent mutations. They tell us to stay out of the sun because UV rays cause mutations. They tell us smoking causes mutations. Then researchers say mRNA shots prevent cells from repairing mutations…and everyone is quiet. If the risk isn’t real, shouldn’t they at least have told us that? They haven’t.

But we should trust them, because science. Right? Wrong. The medical establishment is politicized. Along with the press and the government, it hides things from us. It’s no wonder there are so many insane conspiracy theories about coronavirus. How many times do officially-endorsed lies and omissions have to be revealed before people start turning to alternative sources?

In Europe and other parts of the world, anti-vaccination riots have been going on for months, and not even Fox News covers them. The people at Fox pretend to be MSM outsiders, but it’s a very thin facade. Fox made its employees submit to vaccinations and tests. If riots can take place in high-profile places in Europe and we have to go to Youtube to find out about it, it proves we can’t trust the establishment. Like we needed more evidence.

Since beginning to write this piece, I have learned that Fox has just “discovered” the foreign riots. Congratulations, Fox, and welcome to last year.

We have no way of knowing whether the mRNA shots are safe, because no one in a position of power will even confront the question.

How many times have establishment claims about these shots been proven badly wrong? Many. In view of that, how can we trust the establishment now?

The establishment is run by people who don’t believe in God and have a phobia of death and a love of authoritarianism and elitism. They are genuinely scared of covid. They can’t be trusted to tell us the truth. They couldn’t make themselves do it if they wanted to. Fear leads to rationalization. It causes people to convince themselves the truth is wrong.

The establishment makes up narratives and feeds them to us, we occasionally see through them, we look for other sources, and then we start believing nutcases who say they’re injecting us with cameras or sterilizing us or God knows what else.

Solomon said, “A good name is better than precious ointment,” and the establishment’s name is no longer good at all. It’s not even good enough for government work. Credibility is something that should only be sacrificed with great reluctance, because sooner or later, you will want to use it in a very critical situation. The establishment didn’t take this into consideration.

Our anti-coronavirus measures are not working, and, as everyone with common sense predicted, fatigue has set in. People are saying, “A few deaths are okay as long as I don’t have to wear a filthy mask and recycle my own stale breath for 10 hours a day.” They want to send their kids back to school. They want to socialize, which is essential to mental health. They are remembering something they had forgotten before the pandemic started: liberty is worth the sacrifice of a certain number of lives.

You can’t make relatively free people hide in their houses and wear ineffective masks forever. They got us to comply by assuring us it was all temporary, but since they started saying that, children have been born and learned to walk and talk. Increasingly, people are not buying it.

A normal social life is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. Anyone who thinks otherwise is an ignoramus. Isolation ruins our mental and physical health. It’s remarkable that we hear so little about this. The leftists who control education and government whine about things like how much room pigs and zoo animals have to move around, but they think human beings can hole up in their homes with no ill effects.

How could anyone have been stupid enough to think zero covid was possible? How do people like that get degrees in medicine and positions in government? We should have isolated fat, sick, and old people who were willing to be isolated, and we should have been much less demanding regarding the vast majority of us.

Now people are so tired of the nonsense, even if a good approach pops up, many of us won’t want to hear about it.

The most remarkable thing about our situation after two years of coronavirus is that there has been no revival. It used to be that people were smart enough to know epidemics were caused by sin and backsliding. Not any more. America has gotten much more vociferous and fanatical in its promotion of sexual perversion, idolatry, pride, and other things that bring calamity on us. God has no reason to relent and help us out.

Because we have dug in our heels, I think Omicron will be a pause, not a finale. Either a worse variant will follow it, or some other apocalyptic evil will hit us. I hope the break will last long enough for my wife and I to get together permanently. I would be shocked if the world’s descent into chaos actually stopped.

By the way, I had an interesting revelation the other day. For some time, I’ve believed coronavirus was partly a punishment for perversion. I saw the parallel between the modern world and Sodom. Now I feel I know more about that.

Homosexuals love to claim Sodom was not punished for perversion. They cite a Biblical passage that says Sodom’s sin was selfishness. Of course, the Bible does say Sodom was punished for perversion, but why would it also mention selfishness?

England used to be America. England was the world’s big superpower, and they spread the gospel. As England’s power and wealth increased, men became drunk with ambition and greed. They were taken away from their families by their ambitions. They forgot God, too.

When men aren’t around to raise their sons properly, sexual perversion flourishes. This is why homosexual antics are such big problems at boarding schools. British men were selfish and greedy, and now British males are effeminate. It’s pretty easy to tell a typical gay American from a straight one, but most educated Englishmen seem gay regardless of their orientation.

Think about it. Pick a British or near-British celebrity at random. Piers Morgan: effeminate. Hugh Grant: effeminate. Jeremy Clarkson: effeminate. James May, Richard Hammond, Peter O’Toole, Oliver Reed, Hugh Laurie, Rex Harrison, James Mason, Colin Firth, Christopher Lee, Claude Rains, Richard Burton, Laurence Olivier, Cary Grant, Ian McKellen, Patrick Stewart, John Cleese, Eric Idle, Roger Moore, Timothy Dalton…you could make a list a yard long. The exceptions are often men who came from the lower classes, where success was presumably less of a problem.

It looks like focusing on money and power neutralizes the effectiveness of fathers, and that’s how perversion creeps in. It makes sense, because homosexuality and other perversions are commonly associated with prosperity. It’s remarkable how many high-profile people have homosexual or otherwise unusual children. Will Smith, who may hold the world record for selfishness and ambition, has two. Stephanie Seymour produced two. Dick Cheney has one. Jackie Chan, Cher, Jamie Lee Curtis, Magic Johnson, Dwyane Wade, Sally Field, Annette Bening, Barba Streisand (no surprise), Marie Osmond, Charlize Theron, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, R. Kelly…again, the list is long.

The British abandoned God for Mammon, they became effeminate, and then they lost the wealth and power for which they had traded God. It’s very interesting. It explains what’s happening to America. Men pattern themselves after their fathers, and when Dad isn’t around, Mom becomes the father.

I still see America continuing to sink. Christians are obsessed with money and “living their best lives,” so they are not helpful to people who are looking for answers. They don’t heal people. They don’t work miracles. They don’t prophesy. We complain a lot about how nonbelievers are ruining the world, but as a friend of mine says, fish rots from the head. We were supposed to lead and show our love, but we’re not doing it, and we are reaping the harvest.

I hope we get a real remedy for coronavirus, but it won’t fix the rot that brought us here.

If You Hold Me Responsible for my Views, You are Ageist

What a wonderful day. Governor Ron DeSantis has banned discomfort for white people.

It must be true, because a Yahoo News headline says it is.

I am white. I try to downplay it, because it’s so embarrassing, but it’s true. Of course, I am not happy with myself. I am ashamed about not being ashamed of being white. It torments me day and night. For some reason, I just can’t seem to get down on myself over my complexion, my inability to dunk a basketball, or my secret love of golf pants. The resultant self-loathing probably costs me several minutes of sleep every year.

That’s all over with now, because White Governor Ron is going to make it impossible for me to feel bad about anything, ever again.

Oh, wait. It’s not Governor Ron. Sorry about the mistake. I guess I got the idea he was handling this because YAHOO PUT HIS PHOTO AT THE TOP OF THE STORY.

There is a bill in the Florida State Senate, proposed by a legislator named Manny Diaz, whom I have concluded, based on my remarkable investigative skills, is not Ron DeSantis. Here is what the bill says:

An individual, by virtue of his or her race or sex, does not bear responsibility for actions committed in the past by other members of the same race or sex. An individual should not be made to feel discomfort, guilt, anguish, or any other form of psychological distress on account of his or her race.

Wait…is this supposed to help white people? Because it kind of sounds like the things civil rights activists used to say in the Sixties. Back then, they told us everyone deserved a fair chance regardless of his race.

This could be a first draft. Maybe it will eventually be corrected to say things like “An individual CAUCASIAN, by virtue of his or her race or sex…”

The story says DeSantis is “pushing” the bill. Forget all those state senators. Blaming them would be like blaming keyboard keys (all black) for things I write. When Governor Ron wants a bill passed, he just sticks out his arm and does one of those Emperor Palpatine telekinesis things.

The bill will supposedly apply to state-sponsored education. It’s not clear, because the article is not written well. The person who wrote it was almost certainly educated by leftists, so we must make allowances.

I hope it applies to everything, because I just want to feel good all the time.

Is it wrong to laugh about stories like this? It must be, because I am doing it, and I am white. Everything white people do is wrong, including agreeing with little brown people, because we do it incorrectly, appropriating their cultures and somehow being motivated by the desire to turn their home countries into rubber plantations.

On the subject of subjects that make people really uncomfortable, my friend Mike has a new 25%-black granddaughter, and so far, she looks pink. I sent my wife a photo, and we laughed and laughed. The baby is very cute, so don’t get the wrong idea. It’s just that her parents are leftists, and, well, we can’t help thinking they will be disappointed if their daughter ends up looking so white she attracts CRT-style criticism and condemnation instead of sympathy and handouts.

It kind of makes you wonder what “black” means. If you’re over 75% white, and you were raised by a white dad and a 50%+ white mother, and your mother was raised by a white couple, and most people think you’re white, you’re not exactly Shaka Zulu.

It makes me think about my grandfather, who was a Cherokee Indian. He had dark skin, straight black hair, and a total inability to handle alcohol. He had to abstain completely in order to control himself. Does this make me an Indian? Granted, he was my father’s stepdad, so I’m not really related to him, but I read that the chief of the Cherokee nation was 1/32 Indian, so it seems like I should qualify. I’m 31/32 as Cherokee as my chief is. Where is my government money? I’m going to the drugstore to buy a deck of cards. My new casino opens at 5 p.m.

It wouldn’t be funny if people were hard on her for being white, but it would be extremely funny if her parents were frustrated because they had a difficult time getting her preferential treatment. This would be doubly true if my own future children, the spawn of two anti-CRT conservatives, were simultaneously pampered by the anti-white establishment. They will be darker than Mike’s granddaughter.

Rhodah wants to have kids, so we talked about these issues. I said we would have to home-school them, because otherwise they would be indoctrinated with CRT. Then I reversed course, realizing I had it all wrong. I said we definitely needed to send them to public school, because if they teach them CRT, they’ll basically be kissing their butts and doing them favors all day. Our kids would be part of the new ruling oppressor class. What could be better than that? I want my half-African kids to be ruling oppressors with all sorts of race-based privilege. Then they can buy me things.

Go, CRT! Get my kids as much preferential treatment as possible! I’m old, and I’ll be dead soon. No one cares about my future. Not even me. Just help my wife and kids.

I said we could forget about paying college tuition, because it’s so easy for black kids to get scholarships. Rhodah said we should prepare the kids for interviews by putting them out in the sun. They will want to be nice and dark.

As for me, I would simply hide. After all, I wouldn’t be the one applying. I could skip all their college events and then show up at graduation. Possibly in blackface, but that all depends on how willing I am to risk being outed and killed.

I would be well into the senility danger zone by then, so maybe I could take chances other people couldn’t. “Don’t mind him. He thinks it’s 1986, and he wants us to take him home so he can watch Gimme a Break.” If they pushed me, I could start calling everyone “Mary” and asking if the pancakes were done.

It’s wonderful, if you think about it. Right when it’s becoming fashionable to persecute me, blame me for your problems, and take my wealth, I’m about to generate a family that will belong to the new privileged class. In a way, the old white guy is still winning.

If you’re a leftist, and you’re reading this, it must burn. That’s just tough. No matter how much you hate me, you will have to love my wife and kids.

In truth, I think it would be unwise to send our kids to college unless they want to do things involving math and science. I mean, assuming we have to pay for it. For most people, College is the worst waste of money imaginable. You take incredibly stupid classes like Medieval French Poetry and English Lit., which you could just as easily learn on your own for nearly nothing, and you pay up to $90,000 per year. Think about that for a minute. Let’s say you take 10 courses per year, so $9,000 per course. So if you send your kid to Harvard, and he takes “Tacos, Tamales, and Tequila: Eating and Drinking in Ancient Mexico” (actual Harvard course), you and your retirement nest egg will shell out $200 per class session.

When I say liberal arts classes are incredibly stupid, I don’t mean the subjects are stupid, although many are. I mean it’s stupid to pay outrageous sums to learn these subjects.

A couple of years back, I felt bad about cheating in order to avoid failing a college course, so I bought all the books for the course and read them. It was torture. If you’ve read Homer and Sappho, you will understand. Nonetheless, it was very easy apart from the pain of the kidney-stone-rivaling boredom, and I’m confident I got just as much out of it as the people in my class who actually did the reading when they were young. I probably spent $250 for the books, and that’s a lot, but it’s better than going to Harvard and paying $200 per lecture for two semesters ($18000).

Actually, at Columbia, it would only run $12000 this year. Even Billy Mays would be shocked by a bargain like that.

Let’s be real. Unless you’re a 90th-percentile student in terms of sincerity and motivation, you’re not going to do the reading in literature classes. You’re going to pay thousands of dollars to be tested on your comprehension of Cliff’s Notes. Almost no one actually wants to read Don Quixote or Ulysses. You’re going to waste your parents’ money, do as little work as possible, and get a B unless you’re at either extreme on the grade curve. When you’re out in the world as a graduate, you will never look at the books you were forced to pretend to read, and they will only enrich your life to the extent that they make it easier to understand pretentious cultural references and answer Jeopardy questions.

What if, instead of paying $400,000 for my kids to learn how to be well-read waiters and cab drivers, I gave each one a subscription to IBD and The Value Line, handed over $400,000, and helped them to invest it? Three and three-quarters years later (college doesn’t really take 4 years), they would probably have net worths of $500,000 each, and we would probably have found clever, legal ways to put some of it in IRA’s. Where would their friends be? In those awful cubicles that trap most college graduates, grinding out sums little better than minimum wage, proving to the world how fungible they were. They would be commodities; my kids would be franchises.

What if they used the money to start businesses? They would probably be even better off, as long as they did it right. I could hook them up with wealthy mentors from SCORE who would advise them for nothing. Maybe they could get investors and avoid risking their own (my) capital. It worked for Arianna Huffington, who turned a balloon farm with zero profits into a fortune.

Now I’m thinking about Ulysses. I really tried to read it. I did it after college. I actually liked literature, and I figured there had to be something to the book. For 300 agonizing pages, I kept slogging, thinking the value of the novel would soon become apparent. It never did. It was unbearable and worthless. Even worse than Virginia Woolf’s The Lighthouse, which I read during my cheating penance.

Harvard has a course dedicated to Ulysses! I just checked! Imagine spending $9,000 to find out James Joyce was a horrible writer with nothing to say! Thanks, Mom and Dad! You’re going to die in blue Walmart vests, but it was all worth it!

I don’t get Joyce and Woolf. Are they supposed to be the Jackson Pollocks of literature? Was it innovative to write novels that had no plots, themes, memorable characters, wit, or messages? There is a “million monkeys at typewriters” joke in there somewhere. There should be a Million Monkeys book award.

When I was at Columbia, I took a creative writing course. Two semesters. What a waste of time and my dad’s money. The instructor was a guy named Michael Stephens. Nice guy. He had worked on a ship, so he had written a novella called Shipping Out. I actually bought it. Today, if you search for it, you will find almost no references to it. Those who can, do, and so on and so forth. When you take a STEM course at a good school, your instructor will probably be a top practitioner in his field. When you take a liberal arts course, you get people who got tired of working at The Olive Garden.

I’m not saying Mr. Stephens worked at The Olive Garden, but he wasn’t Herman Wouk.

The class was pleasant. We sat at a big table in the journalism building, which was cleverly named “Journalism”, and we were allowed to drink in class, so I would bring six-packs and share. The assignments were easy. Did they improve my writing? Of course not. We sat around and listened to Mr. Stephens talk about dharmas. The punchline of the dharma story is, “Take good care of my dharma,” in case you’re wondering. That will get you an A at your temple. It’s brilliant. Trust me; don’t try to understand why. Good American Hindus and Buddhists don’t figure things out. They just “get it.” Do what everyone else does. Pretend you got it.

No one is actually enlightened. The point is to smile a lot, say utterly meaningless things as though they were extremely important, and act like you’re high on something.

Apparently, if you want your own dharma, whatever it is, the key is to not care what other people think. That’s kind of strange, since leftists love Hinduism yet also hate people who don’t care what other people think. If it doesn’t bother you that they’re offended, you are worse than Hitler.

Maybe Trump has a huge dharma.

We also talked about the angry Irish-looking student and his girlfriend Mara Hennessy. I still remember that name. I am spelling it by sound. I didn’t have occasion to read it. Sounds like a Cognac heiress. She was very sweet and had a boxer’s nose. You don’t get one of those from happy relationships. I don’t know how she got hers, but I have suspicions. I missed one or two classes, and one night I returned and heard everyone talking about Mara and her boyfriend. Something about domestic violence and a threat toward Mr. Stephens involving a bat, and they would not be returning to class. That was interesting and sad, but not worth what my dad paid for it.

Wow. I just Googled. Her last name is Hennessey, and she married Buster Poindexter, AKA David Johansen. He’s the near-celebrity who played the weird-looking cab driver in the movie Scrooged. He has never been much of a national figure, but when I was in college, he was a big deal in New Jersey. That, in spite of being born on Staten Island. I remember seeing him on The Uncle Floyd Show. Or maybe I just thought I saw him. I drank a lot in college.

I realize you have no idea who Uncle Floyd Vivino is, and there is no valid reason to waste your time by telling you.

I will call the Irish-looking guy George, because I think that was his name. George wore a black wool overcoat, which was the standard outer garment of the Columbia tortured artist. If you didn’t like black, you could wear grey herringbone. If you really wanted to impress chicks with your torturedness, you also wore a keffiyeh around your neck, as though you actually cared about Palestinians. Columbia was heavily self-hating Jewish, so maybe the keffiyehs were intended to show the world how much Jewish kids disagreed with the productive capitalist podiatrists and orthodontists and landlords who paid their bills.

I always thought it was funny that you had to dress like all the other nonconformists if you wanted your nonconformity to be taken seriously. This was literally true.

Of course, virtually all of the tortured artists became various types of corporate drones, unless they became academics so they had cradle-to-grave security while continuing the rebel charade.

One of my friends practically worshiped a campus rebel named Elpidio. He was of Mexican descent. I don’t want to call an American a Mexican. Elpidio was all about the revolution and sticking it to the man. I remember when he came to our place to help us prepare guacamole for a party. He and I made it. He told me it wasn’t going to be a “sibli guac.” I am guessing at the spelling of the word “sibli,” which he said meant something like “sellout” or “bourgeois.” It was a Chicano revolutionary word. We didn’t have latinxs yet. Just Chicanos. We were going to have an authentic guerrilla guac worthy of Cesar Chavez, I guess. Worthy of being strained through Frida Kahlo’s moustache. I didn’t really know what he was talking about.

He ended up at Harvard Law.

The next time I heard of him, he was a corporate lawyer, representing McDonald’s against little people, some of them probably brown, whom McDonald’s didn’t want to pay. McDonald’s had one of those promotions where you, I don’t know, scratch something off a cup, maybe, and you get money. Greedy old Ronald wanted to make sure no one who was ineligible got any money, so they went after employees, their relatives, their friends…and Elpidio the tiger of the barrio was there to protect those precious capitalist gains. I thought that was hilarious. My friend thought Elpidio was an inspiration and a genius. I wonder if he ever read the McDonald’s story. Can’t recall whether I discussed it with him.

The herd leftists were really funny. They protested and posed, and then they went into academia or the business world to get financial security. They became exactly what they claimed they hated, and, remarkably, they continued to pretend to be rebels. Does this mean they changed? Of course not. It means they were never rebels; just liars who loved attention.

Where am I? Pretty far from where I started. I don’t really believe a new state law will prevent white people from being uncomfortable, but it’s amusing to read about it. I do think my children will be extremely privileged unless people connect them to me. I think it is unlikely that we’ll pay full tuition if they go to college. This is based on personal observation of the experiences of black students I have known well.

I think my kids should go into business and forget college. The true purpose of college is to ensure financial prosperity, and it does a poor job of that. In the process, it teaches people to hate God, love poisonous socialism, fornicate, experiment with perversion, and take drugs.

I hope Jesus returns before such decisions have to be made. I am ready to go. Today. Tomorrow. Yesterday. My main plan for the future is to intercede for others and try to help people know God. I’m not interested in establishing a dynasty in a gangrenous world.

Popeil Appeal

I guess I have a lot of nerve, because I have decided to second-guess the great Ron Popeil.

As some readers know, I recently picked up a Ronco Showtime rotisserie oven, unused, on Ebay. I felt I needed it. My dad had one, and it was great. My friend Mike has two of them. You would think nothing with the Popeil name on it could possibly be worth buying, what with all the attention his spray-on hair got, but it isn’t true. The original Showtime was a reasonably well-built product made in South Korea, and it did what he said it would do. It made great food.

It’s very weird that the Showtime has no present-day competitors. George Foreman sold rotisseries, but they vanished from the market. You can get vertical rotisseries, but they’re stupid. The fat runs off the food. No self-basting.

I’m going to guess the food Nazis are behind the vertical rotisserie problem. Who else would drive a policy that dumb? Competent cooking is literally impossible without fat, and fat is good for you, but people are still convinced it’s evil. What kind of fool would spend hundreds of dollars on a machine designed to cleanse food of the very thing that makes it delicious and juicy?

So far, I have cooked four things in the oven: a chicken, a rib roast, and two pork roasts. I learned a couple of things.

1. You have to be careful about applying too much salt, because the rotation of the spits makes it hard for things to run off the food. More of the salt will stay where you put it.

2. Some dishes would probably be better if the oven had a lower heat setting.

The pork roasts I fixed were magnificent. The rib roast I made was fine, but it was too salty. The chicken was done, but not done enough to be tender, and the skin was getting dark when I took it out of the oven.

The Showtime has three settings, but none of them have anything to do with heat. You get one heat setting, and you’re expected to accept it. The spit assembly can be placed in two different positions, one of which is farther from the heat, but the difference in heat that reaches the food is small.

I looked into ways to vary the heat, and I found three solutions, only one of which have I seen applied.

1. Attach a simmerstat to the oven.

2. Buy an AC speed control for power tools and splice it into the heating element circuit.

3. Put a diode and a switch in the same circuit.

A simmerstat is a device found on stove burners. It turns a burner on and off repeatedly. The overall effect is to lower the heat output. Depending on the ratio of on time to off time, you can get plenty of control. Because the simmerstat shuts the juice off instead of shunting it through a resistor, it doesn’t give off a lot of heat. Resistors always use up energy and give off heat. A stove burner coil is a resistor.

I do not know how a speed control works, but since they don’t heat up and catch fire, I know they don’t use big resistors. Maybe they work like simmerstats.

A diode will only pass current in one direction. A heating element in a Showtime oven runs on AC, which means the current switches direction 60 times per second. If you stick a diode in the circuit, half of the time, the circuit will not pass current. That means you should get something like a quarter of the energy output. For DC, it would be a quarter for sure. Don’t ask me about AC, because AC is somewhat different, but half is in the ballpark.

A Youtube genius got himself a big diode and a switch, and he modified his oven. Now he can cook stuff slowly when he wants to.

I considered the alternatives, and I decided to get a diode. A simmerstat or speed control would involve a lot of work to make it part of the oven, and I don’t think I really need a wide range of heat settings. I think high, low, and off will get the job done. I ordered a diode, an SPDT switch, and some spade connectors, and when they get here, I plan to roast a chicken. When I’m done working on the oven, it will look no different than it does now, but for a toggle switch on the control box.

Once the heat issue is solved, my only complaint will be that the top of the little broiler-style drip pan that sits in the bottom of the oven is hard to keep clean.

The oven literature says the pan is nonstick, but to me, it looks like plated steel covered with some kind of ceramic. It sticks to everything. Whenever I use the oven, I cover the pan and grate with foil and poke holes in the top for the grease, but stuff still burns onto the top.

I don’t trust the pan to remain rust-free in the dishwasher, but maybe it will. The new ones do. I need to find out. The dishwasher should remove nearly all of the crud.

I made my second pork roast last night, and it was superb. I will post the recipe, which is extremely simple. Obviously, it will also work in a conventional oven.

INGREDIENTS

pork roast (shoulder)
12 oz. apricot or peach nectar
2 tsp. pressed garlic
1 tsp. sage
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tbsp. butter
1/2 cup sweet Marsala or Harvey’s Bristol Cream

Salt your pork roast and let it sit for a while to take the salt in. Boil the other ingredients together until you get a thick syrup that doesn’t run. Cover the roast with the syrup and roast it however you want. Make sure you burn the outside a little to make a nice crust. You’re looking for around 150° on the inside. I think low and slow is the way to go, followed by increased heat to brown the crust.

I gave a 4-pound roast something like 25 minutes per pound, and it was excellent. Very juicy.

It would probably be even better to double the sauce and reapply it halfway through. It’s easier to apply the sauce once the roast is attached to the spits.

I like to bone my roasts and tie them back up, tightly, with twine. You save maybe $1.50 per pound for 5 minutes’ work. To make tying easy, use a butcher’s knot. Look it up.

You can’t imagine how good this tastes.

Smell the pork package at the store to make sure there is no boar taint. If you get a smelly roast anyway, you can brine it with baking soda to kill the stink.

I look forward to my first low-temperature chicken. Should be wonderful.

If You Did These Things, You Might Just be a Sociopath

Last night, I heard a new story about the most consistently disappointing person I’ve ever known.

This individual threw her life away on drugs, spent her fortune, lost her professional license, got convicted of a felony because she didn’t feel like completing a diversion program, lost her house and possessions, ended up in a homeless shelter, and was taken in by a kindly aunt. Once she was in her aunt’s home, she took over a guest room, made her aunt pay for her food, stained the carpet and furniture, and caused roaches to move in. She told her aunt she couldn’t be evicted because of coronavirus.

Here is the new story: when she was finally thrown out, the aunt found chewing gum stuck to the underside of her dinner table. Several big blobs. And her guest has very few teeth.

Human depravity is a marvel.

Before things turned completely sour, the aunt’s daughter offered to give this person a 2008 vehicle in very good shape. The offer was declined. She said she wanted a BMW.

Sit and let that soak in.

Hell doesn’t exist solely to punish. It also exists to bless the righteous by keeping the depraved out of their sight. When you’re in hell, the people in heaven can’t see you or hear you. They don’t get updates on you. They don’t visit. They never ask God to help you. They don’t think they owe you anything. They don’t remember you existed. You can’t put on a black outfit and a mask and go to heaven to riot for what you think are your rights.

This has to be one of the best things about heaven.

God told me it’s more important to get the wrong people out of your life than it is to bring the right people in. If you have 5 friends and one enemy whose presence is a stench in your nostrils, you’re better off cutting the enemy off than looking for a 6th friend.

I think hell is very important. I believe God will not annihilate a spirit, and this is consistent with the Bible. That means every evil being ever created still lives. Based on my observations of humanity, I also believe every spirit grows more powerful given sufficient time and opportunity. I think the pain of hell and the lake of fire isn’t just punishment; I think it prevents spirits from getting stronger and causing more problems. All they can focus on is their agony. People who claim they’ve visited hell and the lake of fire say the spirits in these places are close together in distance but completely alone when it comes to interaction. That makes sense to me, because it prevents them from unifying against God.

I am sure there are many people in hell who have never repented. I’m sure there are people there who still think they’re right and that God has mistreated them. I think that even if God somehow found a way to give them the opportunity to be saved, they would stand in the flames, curse him, and turn him down. I have been on Earth for several decades observing human nature, and my opinion is based on what I have seen.

It’s pleasant to think God has a plan for cleaning out hell and fixing the spirits who are confined there, but I have no reason to think that will happen, and there is a ton of evidence that it won’t.

It’s important to understand depravity and to admit it exists. Otherwise, you will always see God as cruel and unfair for building the lake of fire.

I have learned that most people do not believe in depravity. We love to say people are basically good. That’s completely wrong. The very best of us may be good by human standards, but by God’s standards, all human beings are filthy and evil. We all deserve hell, and many of us are so vile we should be killed on sight. As I write this, babies and children are being raped, tortured, and murdered by people who are not merely able to tolerate it but extremely aroused sexually. Slaves are being beaten. Doctors are tearing the unborn apart and thinking about the money they’re making. In order to stand this life, we develop the habit of avoiding thinking about the evil around us and inside us, but it’s always there.

Pride tells us we’re not so bad. No wonder homosexuals call their movement “pride.” We can’t see God sitting on the throne, so we have no idea what good looks like. We therefore decide we must be good.

When you know someone who is extremely depraved, the only people who will believe your stories about that person are other people who know the depraved. Everyone else who hears what you say will think you’re a self-righteous bastard. Sometimes people who don’t believe you will take up a depraved person’s cause and give them things like housing and money. Trying to do what the bastard should have done. Then what happens a little later? They call and express their amazement at the depravity. Either they’re mad at you because you didn’t warn them, although you did, or they want to apologize over and over for not believing you.

The death penalty exists for a reason. Life without parole exists for a reason. Solitary confinement exists for a reason.

They say a conservative is a liberal who got mugged. That principle is at work in our dealings with the depraved. There are some lessons the proud can’t learn except from experience. If you won’t trust an honest person who tries to warn you, and you think you know better and that you’re morally superior, bad things will happen to you.

There is always symmetry in the supernatural. There are many beings who harm us simply by existing and being seen and heard by us. It’s easy to hurt other people simply by being perceived in some way. Think about women who dress like sluts. They tempt and corrupt men just by showing up. Think about pop musicians who put filth in our minds every time we hear them. Consider perverts who perform public displays of affection in front of children. Consider people who wear T-shirts with obscene slogans on them. It’s very easy to harm people simply by being seen or heard, and people who do that kind of harm also hurt us when they interact with us. To protect yourself from some people, it’s not enough to try to coexist peacefully. You have to be in a place where they can’t go.

On the other hand, by symmetry, there is one being who benefits us every time we see him, hear him, read his words, pray to him, or think about him. God’s presence is joy, love, peace, faith, and healing. Unless he has given up on you, which happens all the time, to be near him is to be blessed, even when he criticizes or chastises you. God is completely beneficial. By symmetry, he is the counterpart of depravity. He helps us to become like him so we are beneficial, too. Children are supposed to take after their father, and he is literally the father of Holy-Spirit-filled Christians.

I don’t regret discarding people. I have never discarded anyone who wasn’t a minus. I never wish I had any of them back. I am glad they’re gone. I thank God for their absence a lot, and I ask him to keep them away until they change. Some, I just want gone, period, because I know they won’t change. I quit praying for them.

Maybe some of them will be redeemed eventually, but most will be separated from me eternally, so why maintain destructive relationships that will end when I die?

It’s fascinating, the way the universe works. It’s remarkable that no one teaches us these things. I have never seen the ideas I am explaining anywhere. This knowledge could save many millions of people a lot of unnecessary suffering, but it’s just not out there for them to see.

Preachers generally do not hear from the Holy Spirit. To get God’s guidance, you have to pray in tongues a lot, and you have to like being corrected. You can’t be proud. You can’t defend yourself. They don’t hear from God, so they make up crazy doctrine, and they feed it to people and tell them it’s true. People believe it, because they don’t pray in tongues either. Then they stop looking for the truth, which is much better.

Everyone is supposed to hear from God, every day. It’s not just for guys with strange, gigantic hats and self-glorifying robes. It’s not just for people who have TV cameras pointed at them. God knows who you are, and he has been waiting for an opportunity to teach you, but if you are convinced that some old monk in a creepy robe or some grinning jackass with a church the size of a basketball stadium has all the answers, you will never get what God has prepared for you.

Other people can’t teach you everything anyway. There is just too much revelation. You need God to explain it.

I wish somebody would give me a free 2008 car. I’d be all over that like a duck on a June bug.

EUREKA

Aside from the day I “met” my wife (online) or the day we married–no, wait–aside from the day I accepted salvation, the day I received the baptism with the Holy Spirit, AND the days I “met” and married my wife (bases covered now), today is the most triumphant day of my life. I stuck it to the greenies by modifying my old-fashioned eco-hostile washing machine to make the inlet valve easier to clean, and I made the best thin pizza I have ever had.

I got myself a Maytag Commercial washer from Lowe’s last year. It would have been better to get a sister model from another vendor, because the Lowe’s job has a shorter warranty, but I needed a washer fast, and Lowe’s was ready. I got the washer because my old clothes-fermenting Samsung washer was making new noises.

The people who used to own this house weren’t cheap, so they got very expensive laundry machines. Unfortunately, they bought them after Uncle Sam (more like Aunt Sam or maybe Uncle Rupaul) ruined washers with stupid environmentalist rules. Newer washers use too little water, and they never dry out, so they make clothing stink with mildew. There is no remedy for this. If you’ve ever stood next to someone and assumed he smelled like mildew because he was a filthy person, you were almost certainly wrong. Everyone who uses a greenie machine smells like mildew on warm days.

My Samsung started making noise, and I leapt for joy, because I was awaiting the day when I would have an excuse to junk it. I didn’t even consider having it repaired. I had already done my research. Speed Queen used to make good washers, but they stopped. Maytag was the best option.

The Maytag will do a load of clothes in 27 minutes instead of the 90 minutes the Samsung needed, and it only has minimal electronics, so I don’t have to worry about trying to buy a discontinued computer in the future. It uses tons of water, and it dries out between uses. It’s the best.

Problem: the inlet screens were not removable.

Washers typically have hot and cold water inlets in the back, and these inlets are almost always fitted with internal plastic screens you can pull out and clean. This keeps rocks out of your clothing. I can’t believe tiny rocks will damage clothes, and I doubt they hurt washers, since washing machine instructions never say, “Don’t put muddy clothes in machine.” The screens are there, however, so you have to live with them.

My water has a lot of rocks in it, so every few months, the washer starts making scary sounds. Then it quits. The first time this happened, I thought it was broken. No. It was just whining.

I saw that the inlet screens were full of crud, so I tried to pull one out. It would not budge. I couldn’t get it out with pliers. Turning it didn’t help. It wasn’t screwed in. It was a permanent fixture.

Things like this remind me that every engineering class has a bottom 5%.

To clean the screens, I had to pull the washer out into the room, remove the hoses, and use things like an old toothbrush. Unacceptable.

I didn’t want to butcher the original valve. Some day I may need warranty service, and I don’t want the lonely Maytag guy to look at my modified valve, tell me I’ve been a bad boy, and refuse to work on the machine. I decided it was worth it to buy a whole new valve assembly. I forget what it cost. Probably around $60.

I also bought some removable screens made for other washers. You can find them on Amazon. I got 4 for about $7.

I took the new valve and ripped the screens out of it. I shoved new ones in. They fit perfectly. I was ready. I stored the valve assembly in the laundry room and waited for the day when the washer started whining again. Today is that day.

In order to get the old valve out, I had to take the control panel off the machine. That was impossible, because it was held on with special Torx screws that require bits with cavities in the ends. Tamper-proof screws, because, as everyone knows, repairing your own belongings is TAMPERING. I gave up and called Maytag.

Are you high? Do you really think I don’t have a huge supply of tamper-proof bits? Did you seriously fall for that? I got the bits out, took the washer apart, slapped the new valve in there so it looked OEM, stored the old valve, and washed my clothes.

The next time the rocks build up, I can remove a hose, pull a screen out, rinse it in the sink, reverse the procedure, and go back to making pizza or whatever. If the washer develops any other problems during the warranty period, I’ll put the old valve back in before the repair guy arrives.

Is it wrong to play warranty tricks on Maytag? Sometimes. If I had a CNC shop, and I decided to make my own souped-up washer transmission, and it ruined the machine, it would be wrong to put the old transmission back in and pretend it had always been in there. Inlet screens are different. The screens I put in do the same job the old ones did, only better. It will be impossible for them to harm the machine. It would be unfair for Maytag to use inlet screens as an excuse to cheat me out of warranty work.

Corporations play that game sometimes. Some won’t touch a product that has been opened by a consumer. That’s just plain evil, so I don’t feel bound to cooperate.

I only have a three-year warranty, and I probably won’t get to use it, so I don’t think my subterfuge will ever come into play in a repair situation. I still think the money I spent on the new valve was well worth it. A non-warranty repair on a major part could cost a great deal. Also, inlet valves go bad often, and now I have a replacement valve ready to go.

As for pizza, today I had the best thin pizza ever, from any source, anywhere. I am done searching. I’m sure I will continue tinkering, but the recipe I used is recorded and stored, and unless a miracle happens and I manage to improve it, I will use it until I die.

The best thing about it is that it didn’t take a day or more to prepare. People claim you have to let dough ferment for over a day, preferably in a refrigerator. I did that a few days back, and today’s pizza, which rose over about 4 hours, was better. The texture and flavor were magnificent. It puffed up nicely. It had big bubbles, which I like. It browned beautifully. I literally start to drift into a dream state when I close my eyes and remember how it tasted.

I used the last recipe I posted here. I made the dough with cold water to slow down the rise, and I proofed it at 75° on my kitchen counter, on a pan, under a glass bowl to reduce evaporation. It took around 4 hours, not 24. I suppose it could be 2% better if Gordon Ramsay moved in and worked on it for a month, but I have never eaten its equal.

For cheese, I used about 3 ounces of Boar’s Head low-moisture, whole milk mozzarella from the Publix deli, sliced, combined with Sargento thin-sliced provolone. I put the provolone on top because it doesn’t burn easily. Anyone can find these cheeses or their equivalents. No Internet orders or road trips needed.

Walmart sells LMWM mozzarella in blocks for $3.68 per pound. I plan to try it. Boar’s Head costs $10 per pound, which is impossible to justify based on the manufacturer’s cost. If other companies can sell it for less than half that price, Boar’s Head has to be overpriced.

I plan to get a piece of steel for pizza. People say steel is better than a pizza stone. A good pizza steel only costs $139 on the web, so why not?

You believed that? You really thought I would pay that? I’m going to my metal dealer. I’ll bet I can get a 15″ square of 3/8″ plate for under $25.

I don’t know what kind of tool-illiterate leggings-wearing morphodite would pay $140 for a piece of steel plate, but he isn’t me.

It must seem silly for a grown man to get so excited about pizza, but I have been trying to get to this point for decades. I summited the Sicilian pizza mountain 12 years ago, but I was never completely certain my thin pizza was perfect until today. It was good. No restaurant I knew could touch it. But it wasn’t my dream New-York-style pie.

This must be how Edison felt when he stumbled on tungsten.

The only thing left for me to perfect is fried chicken. I have no other food Everests to conquer. There are innumerable things I don’t know how to cook, but then I don’t want to cook them. I know how to make everything I want.

Except chicken.

Pizza is unbelievably difficult. An ideal pizza you picture in your mind is an extremely elusive target. When you make recipe changes you are sure will work, they will often move you further away from your goal. It’s maddening. The really annoying thing about it is that once you get your recipe dialed in, making it over and over is simple. The execution is a joke. The search for the recipe is what crushes your soul.

I ate an entire 12″ pizza earlier, and I want to make another one right now, even though I’m not hungry. I want to relive my victory. I’m not going to do it, but I want to.

I bought two pounds of cheese today. I may have to chain myself to something.

My Greens are Greener Than Your Greens

It’s amazing how stupid people are. Unfortunately, I am a person, so my generalization applies to me.

When I was a kid, there was no such thing as a plastic trash bag. People put their trash in paper grocery bags that leaked and tore. Garbage was disgusting. You would simply throw your bags into your rusty galvanized can, and it would rot and ooze until pickup day. The cans stank even when they were empty. Indoor cans also stank and had to be washed out. It’s not like that today. I have indoor cans that have never been washed, thanks to plastic bags. They still look and smell new, apart from the holes my pets have chewed in them.

Digression: I use the words “trash” and “garbage” interchangeably, because the dictionary gives pretty much identical definitions for them. A lot of people think “trash” means dry stuff like paper, but Mr. Webster disagrees.

It’s sort of remarkable that the human race didn’t start using plastic as its default material for trash bags until I was out of diapers. In patent law, one of the requirements for a new patent is that the invention must be “nonobvious,” and that means it’s not obvious to “one skilled in the art.” The use of plastic for trash bags should have been obvious to everyone, not just bag manufacturers. Plastic bags already existed. For some reason, the little wires in people’s heads didn’t touch, and we were deprived of a great boon for a disgracefully long time.

The Internet says plastic bags were first used for institutional trash in 1950, and Glad introduced plastic trash bags to the public in 1966. They took a surprisingly long time to catch on. Paper bags were commonly used during the first few years of the next decade.

We didn’t have trash bags, but we did have Baggies. These were thin polyethylene bags for food storage. People put them in lunchboxes and so on. They came with little wire ties because the bags didn’t have zipper closures on them. Baggies, or a similar product, were introduced in 1957, so why did consumer trash bags take so long?

When zipper bags came out, the writing was on the wall for Baggies. When I go to the store, I can’t find Baggies. I guess they were discontinued long ago.

I have bought zipper bags for decades. I don’t like them. They’re small and expensive, and the zippers often fail. The zippers are stiff, so the zipper end of a bag always has to be relatively straight. You can’t gather it up.

Really cheap people wash them and reuse them, but who wants to do that? It comes across like a mental disorder, and the bags take forever to dry. Said the guy who actually tried it.

I used to walk around in grocery stores, lamenting the absence of Baggies, pushing a cart containing produce I had stuffed in bags that were almost exactly like Baggies. Again, the little wires failed to make contact.

I started eating salads for breakfast recently, and that means I had to deal with lettuce. I ended up with a storage problem.

It all began with concerns about washing lettuce. I wondered if it was really necessary. I doubted restaurants did it. Washing lettuce is time-consuming, and in the end, you get wet lettuce which is hard to dry.

I checked the web to learn whether washing lettuce was actually important, and I read some disgusting stuff. Evidently, it really is important. Things like sand, bugs, worms, frogs, and fecal bacteria are found on vegetables, even if the packaging says, “Pre-washed.”

As if it were necessary, I am reminded why I have no respect for vegetarians. They love telling us they’re “eating clean” and that meat makes us sick. They also have a big bias against cooked food. Guess what? Frog poop isn’t clean, but a nice steak is. Bacteria can’t do much to the inside of a steak, because it takes them weeks to get there. Microbes can’t do much to people who eat cooked food, because cooking kills germs. Their precious salads kill lots of people every year! Have you ever noticed that nearly all germ-related food recalls involve vegetables?

Okay, that’s not totally true. Ground beef gets a few recalls. But it’s worth the risk, because it’s meat!

You can use a device called a salad spinner. It’s basically a spinning colander in a bowl. You spin your greens and hope the water goes out through the holes. I started looking for a salad spinner. I could not find one that didn’t get awful reviews. They break. They warp in the dishwasher. They’re useless.

OXO used to make a good one, but of course, they quit and replaced it with one that falls apart.

Until I figure out what to do about a salad spinner, I will be rinsing lettuce in the sink and standing the leaves up in a colander to dry. Then I have to store the ones I don’t eat right away. That involves bags.

I can use gallon zip bags at a minimum of about 13 cents each. Okay, I admit it. This adds up to maybe $12 per year, so I can probaby swing it, but it still annoyed me. The bags are not as versatile as a produce bag, they hold a lot less, and I can get produce bags for three cents each.

Needless to say, I just ordered 700 produce bags off Ebay.

“Wow, an eccentric saved himself $7 per year. Why should I care?” I’ll tell you why.

I have a big roll of Costco plastic wrap. It’s useful for covering bowls, but that’s about it. When you wrap things like cheese and bread, it’s a pain to use. It clings to itself and wads up, and you can never open it up so you can use its full length and width. It’s narrow, so it can be hard to get it to cover a dish or bowl well without using several wraps.

It gets on my nerves.

A big ol’ produce bag will hold a fairly large dish or bowl. You can just shove it in there. The bag won’t stick to itself, either.

“The bag won’t close!” Sure it will. If whatever you put in it is under a certain size, you can tie an overhand knot in the open end of the bag. If it’s bigger, you can rest the bag on top of the open end, closing it.

It’s genius.

Obvious genius.

I can also use a produce bag to line the bottom of Marv’s pooping basket. I have a big basket for him, and he sits on the handle when he has to poop. When I’m lucky. I used to put newspapers in the bottom, but I quit subscribing. A three-cent bag will do the job fine.

I already use big cheap bags to line his cage. They’re fantastic. So much cleaner and easier to handle than paper. Every day, he gets a new bag. His poop tray stays clean.

I bought the cheap bags for him, but now I use them for trash.

I found that trash bags ran around a quarter apiece, which is ridiculous. We buy very tough bags when we don’t really need them. If you’re a lazy sack of manure, and you only take your trash out once a week, okay, maybe you need a strong bag. You’ll want something tough so you can crush the trash every day with your shoe to make room, and while the trash is sitting in your kitchen, it will rot and feed roaches, ants, and mice. If you’re a clean person, you’ll remove all the edible garbage from the inside of your house every night, and you’ll get rid of it before it causes problems. You only need your bags to hold a reasonable amount of trash, and they don’t have to hold it very long.

I buy 30-gallon bags for 10 cents each. They’re wonderful. A truck just pulled up and dropped 1500 of them on my porch.

I was an idiot to buy Hefty bags. They’re for suckers. There’s a reason why you never see them at malls, stadiums, and so on. Their crews use cheap bags like mine.

I can still use zip bags and plastic wrap for certain purposes, but basically, I have switched over.

If I still lived in Coral Gables, where the nutbars have banned economical, environmentally sound plastic grocery bags, I would buy a stack of those bags and take them to the store with me. I would drop them in front of the cashier and say, “You encourage people to bring their own bags. Eat your words, baby.”

There is a ban on providing plastic bags for customers. There is no ban on customer-owned plastic.

I may get a couple of rolls of mid-size produce bags, between my trash bags and the produce bags I just ordered.

Of course, I feel bad about filling landfills with so much plastic. It probably adds up to half a pound per month. Clearly a crisis. I’m sure it would be a lot better to use several pounds of paper bags which never degrade once they’re covered with fresh trash. Your greenie virtue-signaling bags will still be intact when your great-great-grandchildren are in assisted living. Then there’s the environmental damage associated with the paper industry.

Don’t think about it. Listen to great geniuses like Jessica Alba and Whoopi Goldberg. How can they be wrong if they’re famous?

Greetings, Fellow Racist Pigs

As part of my program of submitting to wokational traing and becoming as woke-tified as humanly possible, I am here to deliver my daily whiteness confession. I just caught myself whistling “Jingle Bells” in the kitchen.

As you surely must know, if you were educated according to Wokandan guidelines, “Jingle Bells” is a racist anthem, and anyone who sings it or plays it or whistles it in his kitchen full of WHITE cabinets is a vile racist of the lowest order.

Being a racist, I had no idea “Jingle Bells” was problematic until a day or two ago, when I read that a school board somewhere had banned it from schools, right before issuing a bulleting declaring that it had not, in fact, been banned. It had merely been removed from consideration for being sung in schools, which is totally not a ban.

It seems like a ban to me, but then I am a racist, so my opinion is white and therefore invalid.

The explanation seems to be that “Jingle Bells” was performed by minstrels during the 19th century. Also, it contains references to snow, and, well, do I even have to explain?

I know my caucasian contributions don’t mean anything, but I have to wonder if we’ve gone far enough. Minstrels used musical instruments. Shouldn’t we ban those? Especially instruments like the banjo, which are mostly white. We should also ban the clarinet, because it’s black, and white musicians force it to do their will. The black clarinet makes all the noise, and the white man gets all the money.

Minstrels often wore hats and gloves, so those must be white supremacist symbols. Maybe we should abandon clothing entirely. After all, guess who used to pick cotton?

I told my African wife about “Jingle Bells,” and she thought the whole thing was asinine, but then she’s a sellout race traitor who married the problem of whiteness.

I feel bad about typing the phrase “Jingle Bells.” It’s incredibly offensive and packed with triggeration. Maybe we should come up with something less inappropriate. How about “Jinga Bells”? Totally different. Or we could just say “The JB-Song.”

It’s getting really hard to parody wokism. No matter what implausible excess you conjure up, you will usually find it has already been outdone by reality. Life has become an Ionesco play.

In other apocalypse-related news, I just learned that a bill has been PASSED (not merely proposed) that will require new cars to contain remotely-accessible kill switches. Also, cars will have to be able to “monitor” our performance to determine whether we are “impaired.”

This is beautiful. Saw it coming. So did everyone else who wasn’t in a coma. I think it’s fantastic, because it means our totalitarian near-future, and by extension, the apocalypse and man’s need to repent and get to know God, are being rubbed in our noses. We need that.

They already know where we go, using government cameras, private security cameras, cell phone records, computerized tolls, license tag scanners, and those obvious roadside sensors they have never explained to us. Now they will be able to keep us from going.

Let’s see. There are states with voter registration systems that work off driver’s licenses. All cars have to be registered, too, so they know who owns which cars. If you’re not a Democrat, the Deep State will be able to limit or end your driving privileges by pushing buttons a long way off. Won’t that be nice?

What if conservatives want to have a rally in a known location? Sorry. Might have to walk while Antifa and BLM drive. What if civil war comes, and the leftist side has the power to turn the opposition into pedestrians?

What if you really need to run from the government? That’s not crazy talk. The government is going full-throttle Nurse Ratched. If prophecy pans out the way it looks like it will, imprisonments and beheadings will be real possibilities for dissidents before long. If you want to save yourself, you’ll be limited to rollerblades.

What if the Deep State just plain thinks you drive too much? So much carbon! What if they decide you get a thousand miles per month, and you hit the thousand mark a week early? What a great concept. Rationing liberty.

Don’t worry about hackers, though. Our government knows how to keep them out of sensitive systems. It’s not like they’ve ever gotten into networks belonging to government agencies, OVER AND OVER.

So if you have a crazy ex-husband who’s into murder-suicide, don’t worry. He will never be able to pay a pimply non-binary to shut your engine down while you’re trying to beat him to a police station.

The kill switches will never go off accidentally, either. Computers never crash or malfunction. You’ll never get stuck in your truck 40 miles from the nearest city in below-zero weather.

We can now look forward to a future in which we have to beg and comply in order to use our vehicles. If coronavirus persists and gets worse, it will be a perfect storm. No stores or restaurants for you without a vaccine passport. No driving, either.

This stuff is all going to happen. You need to accept it and stop hoping Trump’s AR-15 army will save America. The new Nuremberg era started years ago.

We have already been crippled on social media. Governors and mayors have assumed powers no one ever thought they had 5 years ago. Corporations are turning against us. White people have almost disappeared from TV commercials. Churches have been shut down.

You may think things aren’t that bad right now. Well, they weren’t that bad for Jews when the Nazis began taking their rights away incrementally. Things got worse for the Jews, and they will get worse here for anyone who seems to be associated with Bible-believing Christianity. And the Jews. They never escape notice.

When things really hit the fan, you may have no car, no credit cards, a frozen bank account, no cell service, no electricity or water, and a face that has been fed into the Antichrist’s nifty nationwide or global facial-recognition database.

It’s disgusting how tech-minded, God-dismissing people want to turn us into a big colonial organism with a digital nervous system that connects all the parts. It’s amazing they have so much faith in the collective. Governments are stupid and cruel. History shows us that. It should be obvious that we need distancing from each other and the coercion forced intimacy brings. We need government with inefficiency and blind spots. We need to be able to get away with things sometimes.

Tech people tend to be sort of autistic about the way social groups act. They lack empathy. They are ignorant of the lessons history has taught us about authoritarianism. They are not aware that government is inherently evil and has to be restrained.

They will learn, the same way all proud, ignorant people learn. From their own self-destruction. Their colonial organism will favor them at first, because they’ll design favor into it, but it will turn on them. No one can count on the approval of an authoritarian collective for life. Ask Leon Trotsky.

You can’t remain one of the cool kids forever.

I don’t want to be closer to humanity. I don’t want other people’s reeking, putrid values or their stupid, peer-pressure-based, wrong opinions. I will never be part of the “family.” If your global family is bound together by wires and satellites, I reject it. I don’t care what you ate today; I don’t want to see it on Facebook. I don’t want to know what airheads like Chrissy Teigen, George Takei, and Greta Thunberg think of my ethos.

The walls of the fishbowls we live in are getting thinner every day, so my advice is to prepare to abandon ship. You’re not going to come to a peaceful equilibrium with the children of Satan. Equilibrium has never interested their father.

Full Refund if You’re not Satisfied

My wife and I finally made a move that should have been obvious. I posted a video offering people free prayer.

The pandemic has had people glued in place. There is less face-to-face interaction than there used to be. Travel is also hard. My wife is not here, we can only get together a few times per year, and I don’t see other people often. The other day it occurred to me that we could still do something for the kingdom of heaven. By posting the video, I made it possible for us to be helpful even when we’re apart and unable to be with others.

The basic pitch is this: tell us what you want us to pray about, and we will do it. Obviously, we will not pray for stupid things. We will not pray your ex-wife gets eaten by a shark. We will not pray God helps you beat the casinos. But we are available to people who have problems like addiction, poverty, mental illness, diseases, and so on. The catch is that we will also pray for them to become Holy-Spirit-filled Christians.

Having put the video up, I had a surprising thought. I realized I had never seen another channel offering prayer.

I know of one guy–Mark Hemans–who holds Zoom meetings and posts the video on Youtube. I don’t know of anyone who does what we’re doing.

I’ve seen tons of Christians trying to sell books. I’ve seen them beg for money for their weird projects. I’ve seen people like Kat Kerr and Johnny Enlow, delivering ludicrous fake prophecies in order to avoid honest work. I’ve seen people who were very concerned about the apocalypse and who wanted to share their revelations and dreams. Of course, I’ve seen the TBN crowd, slandering the Holy Spirit by pretending God rewards the poor for sending them their mortgage payments and electricity money. I just haven’t seen financially disinterested Christians offering to pray.

There must be some out there. I should look for them. It’s so obvious; shouldn’t everyone be doing it?

I made it clear we will not accept money or anything else from people. We have no plans to start living off the gospel.

Prior to posting the video, I had felt stagnant. We interceded for people, but we found ourselves praying for the same individuals over and over, and most of them didn’t seem to benefit. I believe people’s problems always stem from their relationships with God, and most people don’t want to change. They want healing, money, and so on, but they don’t want to give themselves to God, admit fault, or turn over new leaves. Their attitudes limit their results.

My hope is that by using Youtube, we will encounter new people who are better prospects.

At least we’ll be doing something other than thinking about ourselves and our plans. That will be nice.

We are still working on travel plans. I believe Omicron will be nearly gone from most of the world by February 1. If it weren’t for that, I’d be in a hurry. It seems like a bad idea to travel until the peak has passed. I’m not afraid of Omicron, because it’s about like a cold, but who wants a cold? Rhodah and I went to Egypt and Turkey, and I got sick both times. That’s plenty.

I expect coronavirus to become a minor issue before spring. Whether that will last, I can’t guess. Maybe a really serious and highly contagious variant will emerge later in the year, and Omicron won’t give us much resistance to it. I think we are very likely to have several months of relief in 2022, either way.

Of course, I am concerned because travel will become unpleasant if restrictions drop and people storm the airports. In Egypt and Turkey, we didn’t have to deal with crowds. We got to fly on planes that weren’t very full. What if we get approved to go to Switzerland or some other dream destination just as jets start filling to the ceiling?

Rhodah had a dream last night. She was at our house, and she was hanging laundry out to dry. A man she was in a toxic relationship parked his car outside the gate and started questioning her about our marriage. He was not happy about it. She told him she really loved me, and she also told him to get lost.

We feel he represents the supernatural influence of spirits that work in Zambia. They don’t want her to leave. On the one hand, Zambia is a Christian nation, unlike the United States, but on the other, there is a great deal of witchcraft there, and cursing other people is a very popular pastime. I doubt the spirits that killed Rhodah’s parents and kept her single are happy about her departure.

She thinks things must be going well with her green card application. She thinks spirits know it’s about to be approved, so they are attacking in order to sow doubt.

If Rhodah gets her visa soon, we can forget about traveling three or four times a year. Our next non-American destination should be our last for quite some time.

The earliest we can expect a green card is the beginning of next month. If that doesn’t happen, it could be as late as June. Either way, I don’t think we’ll need to travel again more than twice.

Of course, Rhodah wants to travel after we’re together. Last year was pretty exciting for her. I don’t know if she has prepared for the possibility that our globetrotting ways might change soon.

A Youtuber I follow posts videos featuring prophecies. Sometimes he talks about other things. He just spoke about a woman he knows. She’s a big prayer warrior. He says her life doesn’t go well. She has suffered a lot.

He says God manifested himself to her recently and asked her whether she wanted to stay here and complete the job she was called to do or leave. She said she couldn’t answer the question. Her heart started fluttering as though she were having an attack. She felt peace come over her, and she fell asleep.

She believes God knew she was about to have a heart attack, so he came to her. It’s not clear, but it seems she thinks he got her through it.

She says her impression is that her future work involves a time of tremendous suffering for the world. She mentioned something from Revelation 6. In that book, when the sixth seal opens, people call on rocks and mountains to fall on them and hide them from the anger of Jesus.

This got me thinking. I believe in a pre-tribulation rapture. All the evidence seems to point to it. Noah’s family was lifted off the earth before the flood. Lot’s family was saved from Sodom before it was destroyed. The Hebrews walked out of the Red Sea before it closed up on the Egyptians. Jesus told the church of Philadelphia it would be spared the hour of temptation that would come upon the entire world, and he was clearly speaking about the future.

If the rapture comes before the tribulation, why would this lady foresee working for God during a worldwide catastrophe predicted in Revelation 6? Shouldn’t she be gone by then?

When I read the Revelation, it appears there are two parts to the final set of miseries that will hit the earth. The first part takes place after the sixth seal is opened. The Bible says people will be terrified, but it doesn’t say there will be global destruction and death.

After the sixth seal is opened, God will seal 144,000 sons of Israel in their foreheads so they will not be harmed. Then a huge number of people appear before God in white robes. They must be in heaven, because they are assembled around his throne. I don’t see any indication the 144,000 will be in heaven at this time.

The people in the great assembly before God are said to have come out of great tribulation, but is it THE tribulation? Every Christian who is serious experiences persecution on Earth. Perhaps these people are the raptured. Perhaps they have been persecuted, but they haven’t experienced the tribulation which destroys the world. After all, the ruin of the world doesn’t take place until the seventh seal is opened.

I’m inclined to think there will be great fear on Earth before the tribulation. This may be what the lady who had the visitation foresaw.

Or maybe she could be wrong about the whole thing.

When I listened to the video, I didn’t understand why someone who was described as close to God would suffer so much on Earth. I have found that if I pray in tongues enough and try to be honest with God, things go pretty smoothly. I have challenges, but they don’t overcome me. Shouldn’t things that work for me work for others?

Of course, maybe she’s not praying in tongues.

The Bible is full of promises of peace and victory, so it’s hard for me to believe a Christian who is doing things well can have a difficult life. Paul suffered a lot, but then he was also a proud and angry man. Maybe he caused himself unnecessary problems. He went to Jerusalem after a prophet warned him he would be imprisoned if he did, uttering what seemed like a proud remark about his dedication to God. He also appealed to the Romans to save him when he got in trouble instead of going to God.

Paul was not perfect.

I have noticed that people who claim to have spoken with Jesus face to face don’t always get their problems solved, and they don’t come away with all the answers. It seems that Jesus doesn’t automatically make up for the gaps in your knowledge just because he visits you or you visit heaven. Teaching people is the job of the Holy Spirit, and we are supposed to access his knowledge through things like prayer in tongues and prophecy.

A pilot named Dale Black says he died in a plane crash and visited heaven. He has a ministry now. He talks with great confidence about many things, but I wonder if he really knows all that much.

He made a lot of money during his career, after the crash, and then, according to him, he sold a business worth $11 million and went into full-time ministry. A little while back, he posted a video asking people to give him $200,000 for a down payment on a piece of land for an off-the-grid Christian pre-tribulation compound.

I had questions.

If he amassed that much wealth, how could he find himself unable to make a down payment on a piece of land? Why would he borrow? The Bible says the borrower is the servant of the lender. It says the righteous will lend and not borrow. Okay, maybe God told him to spend his money on ministry and charity, so maybe the money is gone, but since when does God tell people to beg or borrow? The word says, “Yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken nor his seed begging bread.” If God is really behind this project, I would expect him to provide enough to buy the land outright.

Why would this man go live in the wilderness? I live on a farm, and I want to stay in the country so leftist mobs don’t find me a convenient prey, but I’m not planning to build an apocalypse bunker a hundred miles from humanity and stock it with dried food. I don’t expect to remain on Earth long enough to make that kind of investment necessary, and if I ran off to the woods and hid, how would I be useful to the people God put me here to reach? Carnal millionaires are building weird shelters in remote areas, as rats and gophers would do if they could prepare for disasters. It’s selfish, holing up with a few Christians and hiding food from everyone else while the world disintegrates. It doesn’t sound like something God would tell Christians to do.

The Bible says, “He who loves his life will lose it.” We are not supposed to hold onto this life too hard.

His resurrection story seems convincing to me, but I don’t think he received all the answers. Maybe I’m wrong.

If God spoke to the lady with the heart problem, it doesn’t necessarily mean he corrected all her errors.

Jesus visited me twice, but I can’t stand on those experiences and tell people I should be pope. What I learned was extremely important, but I learned very little. Most of what I know was imparted to me much later, after I was given a strong habit of prayer in tongues.

There are people who say they’ve died and returned, who say they have important instructions from Jesus, yet they don’t mention prayer in tongues, which is incredibly important. I know for a fact that it is essential, but these people do not, and they say they spoke to Jesus. I don’t think he told them everything. Mankind has a responsibility to educate itself, and Jesus will let us remain ignorant even if he visits us.

I’ve seen testimonies from people who were injured badly, lost consciousness, and spoke to Jesus. Some say he told them they would eventually heal, without saying he healed them with miraculous speed. Some of them went through very long periods of healing that didn’t bring total restoration.

That doesn’t make sense to me. If Jesus came to your hospital room in the flesh, he would heal you extremely quickly. There is no doubt of that. He never gave anyone a partial or slow healing in the Bible. I think the people who took a long time to heal, or who didn’t heal completely, must not have had enough faith and knowledge to get it done, or maybe they had things of which they needed to repent. I assume they didn’t make up their encounters.

There is a real tendency for people who have had encounters with God to think they know everything. It’s just not true. They may also try to convince others what happened to them is the best outcome possible when it is not.

It’s very important to learn. John made it clear we are to learn from the Holy Spirit. The Bible is very useful, but translations are never unambiguous, any more than the original Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek were. Anyone can read diligently and still be wrong. You have to pray in tongues and ask for revelation and wisdom.

If you know what you should do to get knowledge, and you don’t do it, God will probably let you flounder in ignorance until you die.

Rhodah and I prayed for the man who makes the videos, as well as the lady he talked about. I hope things get better and better for them.

No More Fungal Bungling

It’s impossible for me to quit fooling with my recipe for thin pizza. My Sicilian is like the pizza they eat in heaven, but I have never truly nailed thin pizza down. Today I really dialed the crust in, and I made an excellent sauce using grocery store tomato products.

It turned out I had been using way too much yeast. Like by a factor of 12. I believe this is the reason my thin pizza sometimes had an unwanted taste that reminded me of cardboard.

I have been experimenting a lot lately, and as of this morning, I thought I was very close. I made a pizza today with some new adjustments, and it was so good, I had to make a second one to see if I could do even better. I succeeded.

CRUST INGREDIENTS

180 g flour (I used King Arthur bread flour.)
115 g water
1 tsp. salt
1 tbsp. sugar
1/2 tsp. instant yeast
1 tsp. cheap olive oil

Put everything but the oil and water in a food processor with a chopping blade. Process to mix. Heat the water to something like 110° and process it in, just until everything is blended well. The dry stuff may stick to the walls of the bowl. You can use a silicone spatula to shove it back down so you can blend it in. Let the dough sit in the processor for 10 minutes. Add the oil and give the dough maybe another 30 seconds. You just want to turn it into a nice wet dough.

It will be hard to handle, so put a thin coat of olive oil on your hands before picking it up. Make a ball. Put it on a lightly oiled dish. Cover it with a glass bowl so you can see it rise, making sure the bowl is big enough for expansion without touching the dough. Let it rise at 75°-85° for about one hour and 15 minutes. You want the dough nice and loose.

While you’re doing all this, you should be heating your oven and pizza stone to 500°. Hotter might be better. I’m limited to 500°. You can use a laser thermometer to check the temperature of the stone. My stone gets up to around 530°, probably because it’s down close to the heat. I like to put a metal object like the grate from a broiling pan on a rack above the pizza to keep heat from browning the top too much.

Tear off two 14″ long sheets of nonstick foil. Join them by folding so you get a wide sheet 14″ long. Cut off the excess so you have a 14″ square.

Toss the dough. You should get a pizza around 12″-13″ in circumference. I like to leave a big lip on the outside, with a center maybe 1/16″ thick.

Spread the dough on the foil. Add your sauce and cheese and use a pizza peel to transfer the whole operation to the stone. The foil will make sure it’s easy to assemble and handle the pizza, and it will keep it from sticking to the stone. Pull the foil out after three minutes. Cook the pizza for about 9 more.

You can get enough sauce for a bunch of pizzas from two cans of tomato products.

SAUCE INGREDIENTS

1 can Cento peeled San Marzanos (contains basil leaves)
1/2 can Muir Glen paste
1 tbsp. garlic
2 tsp. oregano
1/2 tsp. salt
3 tbsp. sugar
1 tbsp. oil
1/2 cup water

Unfortunately, the garlic and oregano measurements are guesses.

You just process this stuff until it has a uniform texture.

This might be better with only half a can of paste. It’s a little sweet, but I wouldn’t go with less that 2.5 tablespoons of sugar.

As for the cheese, my inventory was low, so I had to use 5 slices of Sargento provolone and one slice of Sargento Mozzarella. The pizza was excellent, but I think in the future I should go with 8 ounces of provolone instead of my usual 12 ounces of mixed cheese. If you substitute a little sharp cheddar, it will add some zing.

I sprinkled oregano on the pie before baking.

After it was done, I put it on an aluminum pan, waited 5 minutes, and cut it with a wheel. If I had had company, I would have cut it a little sooner so it would stay hot longer.

I don’t think there is any point in trying to improve this crust, but I probably will anyway. I may reduce the yeast to 1/4 teaspoon. The crust might be better if it started out cool and rose overnight in the fridge, but I like pizza on demand.

I used to use Cento “Italian style” tomatoes, but I can’t find them any more. I like them better than real San Marzanos. I don’t use organic San Marzanos.

If the crust is too chewy for you, I suppose doubling the oil will tame it. I like a real old-fashioned rim you can give your dog for a toy.

Adding a little pepper to the crust will give it more flavor, oddly resembling cherries.

I believe I can finally relax and get over the stress of being 90 minutes from the nearest source of my favorite ingredients. My area has really good pizza, but I can’t get anything as good as what I made today.

Having Ruined Christmas, the Left Moves on to New Year’s Day

The habitual victims among us now have something new to feel bad about! Surely this is cause for rejoicing, because feeling bad is their bag.

It’s kind of surprising I didn’t see this coming. It turns out New Year’s Day is racist!

Some delightful person who works for The Daily Beast just wrote an article saying that in the state of Rhode Island, New Year’s Day was known for a statewide orgy of slave transfers. A sort of Black Friday, but not the kind where you come home with a video game console. Evidently, the event wasn’t limited to Rhode Island. It was a nationwide thing. New Year’s Day was called Hiring Day, and it is said that on Hiring Day, slaves were commonly sold for year-long terms, after which they went back to their owners.

If there is anything to be praised about this article, it’s the astounding admission that Northerners had slaves. They always pretend 1) there were never any slaves in the North, 2) Northerners never profited from slavery after it was banned in their states, and 3) Southerners invented the institution of slavery.

Hello? All of the colonies permitted slavery at first, and Northerners have always had lots of investments below the Mason-Dixon line. Southerners have a long history of selling their natural resources to Northerners for pennies. Maybe a few people have heard the name “Andrew Carnegie.”

Here’s the money part: :

When the American Revolution began in 1775, “Rhode Island was the largest slave trading colony in British America,” according to Leonardo Marques, author of The United States and the Transatlantic Slave Trade to the Americas.

Mike drop. Bazinga.

Is it true? Could be. The fact that a liberal quoted it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a lie.

Slaves were afraid they would be rented out on New Year’s Day, if the story is true, and they feared their families would be broken up.

Okay, that was extremely bad. Over a century and a half ago. It’s 2021.

About a third of the Jewish people were exterminated around 80 years ago, and the Jews were pretty much back on their feet 20 years later. Just saying. I have never had a Jewish person accost me and tell me I should be ashamed of myself because America rejected Jewish refugees fleeing Hitler. America did that, but no one has ever tried to make me feel like it was my fault.

For God’s sake; the Germans, Japanese, and Vietnamese have forgiven America.

It doesn’t matter, because it’s official now: we are no longer allowed to celebrate the new year. Just stop. You’re probably too hung over to celebrate, but if you were starting to feel better, knock it off. Racist scum.

I’m glad this happened, because I had this feeling there were still too many things left for people to enjoy.

I don’t celebrate New Year’s Eve because it’s one of the dumbest holidays of the year, and also because I like knowing where I am when I wake up, but I’m glad to see someone is working to make sure no one else has fun.

Several black people have texted to wish me a happy new year today. Those racist jerks! Clearly, they are white supremacists. At best, they are Uncle Toms. I need to put some white liberals in touch with them to happiness-shame them and teach them the correct way to be black.

Groundhog Day comes in one month. I’ll be ready. I’ll have my offense face on. I shouldn’t have to explain why Groundhog Day is racist. That’s obvious. At least it’s not as bad as Valentine’s Day, when men give women packages wrapped in red, to symbolize the blood of the slaves, and the women chew up chocolates which just happen to be BROWN. Some women receive diamonds. You know where those come from. AFRICA!

My computer is racist! I’m typing little black letters, forcing them to serve me, on a big white page symbolizing white privilege! Why didn’t I see this before? Those poor little letters probably only get 5% of the page.

I’m typing on stolen screen space!

I hope everyone is suitably miserable today. I am, and it feels great.

Movies This Bad Should Come With Warning Labels

I just want to warn the other inhabitants of Earth: do NOT believe the good reviews critics gave for Amazon’s The Lost City of Z.

I felt like watching a mindless adventure/action movie with a pizza, so I went through a bunch of reviews, trying to find something suitable. Something on a par with Pacific Rim or the Spider-Man movies. I tried to find lists of action movies at Rotten Tomatoes, based on audience score. Their audience ratings are the only reliable ratings I’ve ever seen.

Naturally, they refuse to provide such lists. Instead you get Tomatometer scores. The Tomatometer is based on reviews from critics who are, hello, on the take and notoriously wokationified. Even in 2021, critics want to tell you what to watch, and studios tell critics what to recommend.

I found a review for The Lost City of Z, and it looked good. Something about a British explorer on a quest to find a lost advanced civilization in the Amazon basin. I figured it would be sort of like Lost Horizon. A starving explorer would be dragged through an invisible portal into a magnificent city and so on. Sort of like Wokanda, except hopefully less ridiculous.

The movie is nothing like that. It’s based on the story of a real British army officer. It’s unbelievably boring. It’s over two hours long even though it contains enough legitimate material for a 4-minute Youtube video.

The explorer is played by Charlie Hunnam. Until a minute ago (Wikipedia), I had no idea he was British, because he does a really bad British accent. I realize this makes no sense, but he sounded like an American actor who used an incompetent accent coach. Some actors just can’t relax and sound natural. I guess he’s one of them.

Obviously, spoilers are coming, not that you should care. Hunnam is sent into the forest, way up into Bolivia, in order to draw a map and somehow prevent a war between Bolivia and Brazil. During the trip, he finds some pottery fragments and ugly, crude sculptures. A native tells him there used to be a big city with golden stuff, and the junk he finds convinces him it’s true.

He is ridiculed in England, because the very idea that Indians could make pottery and be as smart as white people is just too outrageous and liberal. When I saw this part, I realized why critics pretended to like the movie and gave it affirmative action. It was about brilliant Indians who run around naked and fat, bigoted white people who eat meat and have big carbon footprints.

Why does wokeness have to ruin everything? Can’t we have honest movie reviews? Did crooked reviews for this appalling movie help Indians in Bolivia? Is anyone stupid enough to believe that? Was I supposed to come away from over two hours of torture hating caucasians?

There have actually been entertaining movies that blamed white people for the world’s problems. If you’re going to revise history, it’s not a good excuse for being bad at your job. You can’t say you needed to make a lame movie in order to advance leftism. Even lies can be told skillfully and in an engaging manner.

Have you heard of an amazing ancient Bolivian civilization? No. This means you know how the movie ends. Whatever the big discovery is, it’s not Mexico City all over again. Wikipedia says the actual explorer, Percy Fawcett, failed utterly. I am not willing to watch the rest of the movie to find out how Amazon handled that.

Fawcett’s son went back to South America with him, and they both died. Who wants to see that?

Their big discoveries indicating advancement among Indian tribes were a field of crops planted in rows, and the ability to catch fish by poisoning them. I can totally understand why a person might wonder if they had a space program. The fact that they didn’t have metals, the wheel, or clothing might be considered contrarian evidence, as would their habits of killing people for no reason and eating dead bodies.

Some societies just don’t get much done. Let’s accept it and move on.

There is also a pointless scene in which the explorer’s wife has a loud fight with him because she wants to go. Women can do everything men can do! Remind me of that the next time a man with his testicles sliced off breaks a women’s sports record. It should be this coming month, and again, perhaps several times, the month after that.

Girls are just as good as boys. What a revolutionary message. I remember how exciting it was when I saw it expressed for the first time. I believe it was in 1967, on The Andy Griffith Show,when Andy’s girlfriend beat him at bowling. Still so fresh and relevant in new movies, over 50 years later. I can’t get enough of it. Until I saw this movie, I honestly thought women would get too uppity if we let them wear shoes.

The criminal who wrote this movie clearly thought the woke lady scene was important, even though it brings the movie to a halt and has no relevance to anything that happens later. Wonder Woman stays home when her husband goes back to Bolivia to become the main dish at a barbecue.

This movie really stinks. Do not watch it under any circumstances. I cannot stress this enough: it is not good.

Someone could get rich buying the Rotten Tomatoes audience ratings and using them to provide online guides to movies people actually liked. Meanwhile, critics and other social engineers will keep telling us what they think we SHOULD like.

In closing, CHINESE VIRUS CHINESE VIRUS CHINESE VIRUS CHINESE VIRUS CHINESE VIRUS CHINESE VIRUS CHINESE VIRUS.

Thank you for your time.

Therapy Puppies Will not be Provided

Before I begin today’s blog post, I would like to say some things:

CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU CHINESE VIRUS KUNG FLU SHANGHAI SHIVERS WUHAN FLU

Also:

MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA. MRNA SHOTS DAMAGE DNA.

Furthermore:

TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN. TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN.

To quote Fearless Leader, end of message. On to the post.

Well, shame on me. I was overconfident when I said coronavirus had already peaked in Florida. I was also wrong to say New York State had about 86,000 new daily cases without noting that the health people had done what they always do: they skipped reporting one day and then combined two days’ results for the next day, giving an inflated figure. Finally, I believe I was mistaken to say Omicron had peaked in Zambia. They are still getting around 10% of Florida’s numbers, and while it does look like Florida has peaked, it’s not completely clear.

What was I right about? I was right to say New York State was doing much worse than Florida. It still is. I was also right to say the press was ignoring New York while pretending Florida was a crisis zone. So my premises were completely correct, but I got ahead of myself regarding Florida, and I think what I said about Zambia was factually wrong. I still expect Zambia to turn around fast.

I was right about Omicron going away in South Africa, and I still expect Omicron to go away soon here. South Africa’s spike lasted almost exactly one month. Florida is about two weeks into Omicron. The daily histogram, viewed over a two-week period, appears to show a peak that occurred about two days ago, causing today’s 7-day average to jump. That average can go up the day after a spike peaks. If we get lower figures today and tomorrow, it will suggest the peak hit yesterday and the day before. I think the figure on January 15 will be very close to the low figure we saw on December 15.

New York State’s spike didn’t start with Omicron. It was already moving into a new Delta wave that appears to have missed Florida. The 30-day histogram suggests Omicron piled on top of Delta as of about December 15, so if that’s true, Omicron should go away in the middle of January, but because Delta is still a big deal in New York State, New York may still be in trouble then.

Delta has longer spikes, so I think New York’s figures will remain higher than Florida’s for several weeks.

Let’s see who knows more. Me, a layman who makes wild guesses, or the doctors and scientists who have gotten so many things wrong already.

I was just asking myself this: are they really as stupid as they seem? Can it be that mediocrity is that big a problem among medical people?

This occurred to me: maybe the problem isn’t that they’re stupid. All sorts of brilliant people go into medicine. Maybe the ones that aren’t useless (under 10% in any profession) are trying their best to tell us the truth, but the others are choking them for political reasons and monetary gain. Maybe doctors all over the country are huddling in fear, knowing the truth yet afraid to say it because they’ll lose hospital privileges and referrals.

I know someone who works for a state university. This person can’t say things like, “I don’t think masks work very well” at work. To do so would be to invite termination. My acquaintance isn’t even in the medical field, so it must be worse at that university’s hospitals and laboratories.

Youtube is taking extraordinary measures to keep the truth hidden. Even though I have long predicted this kind of thing, even I was surprised when I saw how bad it had gotten.

Day before yesterday, a ministry I like posted a video saying Christians only had a year to get it together. The ministry’s leader said countries were in the process of passing vaccine laws that would make travel and emigration impossible for people who refused to take shots. I didn’t understand why this was so upsetting to him. No one should be forced to take untested medicines, but the truth appears to be that the viral vector shots are very safe. The mRNA shots have been shown to damage DNA and affect the body’s ability to repair it, but if you can take a viral vector shot and only face a fleeing blood clot risk that only affects 5 or 6 people per million, you shouldn’t be that scared of vaccines. Unless you know something the rest of us don’t.

I wanted to know what he knew, so I posted a comment, including the stuff about the vaccines. The comment vanished. Later, I posted it again. It vanished in a few minutes.

I thought the minister had gone off the rails. I thought he was murdering dissent. Preachers often get that way.

Eventually, I wondered if Youtube was the criminal. I posted a third comment, and the minister said he hadn’t seen the other two.

I finally reposted my comment, using spellings like “DEE ENN AY,” “NJEKSHUN,” and “BLUD KLOTZ.” It stayed up.

Youtube is automatically deleting information which is not only true and important but previously published by MSM sources. What I wrote was factually true, it wasn’t obscene, it wasn’t hateful, it didn’t criticize perverts, and it didn’t encourage violence or the wearing of red hats. It still got erased, and Youtube gave me no notice or warning.

If Youtube is doing this to me, who knows what hospitals, the AMA, universities, and the press are doing to doctors and scientists who want us to hear the truth? A lot of them are getting their messages through, but are those messages neutered to get past the truth-killers? Also, are the communications that get through shadowbanned or otherwise throttled, in order to reduce their reach while giving the false appearance of fairness?

We will probably never know. The truth-killers control the news and write history.

In order to get my comment to work, I went to a different video I had no interest in and kept posting and editing the comment until it survived. I also put up a comment using an anti-homosexual slur to see what would happen. That time, a window popped up, asking me if my comment violated community standards. Whose community? Never mind that question. Anyway, at least Youtube crawled out from under its rock and revealed what it was doing. I deleted the comment after it served its diagnostic purpose.

Try criticizing homosexuality or BLM in a Youtube comment, and see what happens. You won’t like it.

I love this blog, because the daily reads are in 4 figures, and I can say what I like. HONG KONG FLUEY. HONG KONG FLUEY. No one can stop me or keep readers away. Not yet. Eventually, that will change.

It’s really annoying when people say phrases like “Chinese virus,” “CCP flu,” and “Shanghai shivers” are racist. They’re obviously not. Identifying a disease with its geographical origin is not racist, nor is identifying the political party which lied about it and turned it loose on the world without warning us.

The Taiwanese, who are Chinese if not Chinese nationals, say “Wuhan pneumonia.” It is beyond dispute that the virus came from China, and saying so in a lighthearted way, or attaching the initialism “CCP” to it in order to properly allocate blame for the CCP’s near-genocidal coverup, is morally right.

Here’s something leftists don’t get: you don’t actually get to decide what is racist or what other people can say. No one put you in charge of other people. Midget, Indian, illegal alien, looting, riot, whore, pro-life, snowflake, pervert, Eskimo.

Lefto-nuts claim coronavirus slang terms cause idiots to beat up Asians. That’s ridiculous. If people are beating up Asians over the Chinese virus, it’s partly because they’ve seen 5 million news stories saying it came from China, but mostly because they’re idiots.

A lot of people were beating up Asians before coronavirus. They still beat them up for reasons unrelated to the pandemic. Many American blacks are extremely racist, and they commit most anti-Asian attacks. If they mention coronavirus while attacking, it probably doesn’t mean much. Violent, racist criminals will cite whatever excuse they have on hand.

By the way, don’t be deceived. “Attack” doesn’t mean speech. Saying “Chinese virus” is neither a hate crime nor an attack. Leftists claim white people are behind most anti-Asian attacks, and that isn’t even nearly true. They broaden the label “attack” to include nearly everything. A real attack involves physical violence.

In San Francisco, which has a huge Chinatown (Racist term?), a 2008 study determined that 85% of all reported violent attacks (on anyone) were black-on-Asian. That’s not white supremacy or Asian racism at work. Asians were systematically targeted by black people. Nothing could be more racist. At the time, the term “Chinese virus” had not been coined.

Anti-Asian crime is generally rooted in envy. Asians have a long history of moving into blighted minority neighborhoods, opening businesses, and becoming successful where the inhabitants and their ancestors have consistently failed. Many people in these neighborhoods think this is somehow unfair, probably because leftists have been teaching them inequality of outcome proves they are victims of racism, not their own bad behavior. Attacks flow from the victimhood mentality.

Black racists also attack a lot of Arabs and Indians in similar positions, and they are hell on Orthodox Jews. “Shanghai shivers” isn’t the problem. There is zero evidence that slang terms for coronavirus motivate attacks. No criminal has ever said, “I loved Chinese people until I heard somebody say ‘Wuhan flu,’ and then something inside me snapped.”

I’ve been white all my life, and I would know if white people hated Asians. I have only known one white person who seemed to dislike Asians. An uncle of mine doesn’t seem to like Koreans. He thinks they’re mean. I think he may have encountered some angry Korean students in his profession. White Americans generally admire Asians, and my impression is that they like them somewhat better than whites.

Far-Eastern Asians are a little smarter than we are. In America, they commit less crime (not including tax evasion), and they make good money and pay taxes instead of living off them. No one is afraid to walk in an Asian neighborhood at night, except, ironically, Asians. They are afraid of other groups, for good reason. They are probably better Americans, on the whole, than caucasians. What’s not to like?

The CCP is different. It’s important to hold the CCP accountable for the pandemic. It’s not happening, but it should be. Reminding the world the CCP let the virus escape without warning the rest of us could help us prepare for other world-changing CCP crimes which are underway or in the pipeline.

Chinese virus, Chinese virus, Chinese virus. Read it here while you still can.

Unless Xi’s moronic crackdown on capitalism, and by extension, success cripples the whole country, China will continue to ascend. America’s dominance seems certain to vanish soon. God isn’t going to continue favoring a country that abandons him and tries to compel better nations to promote homosexuality, which God absolutely hates.

I think the CCP will go after Taiwan soon. Why should they be afraid? They beat us in Korea and Vietnam, after all. No one likes to say that, but it’s true. We won’t lose because our military is weak. We will lose because we give up.

We will only put up token resistance before accepting humiliation and making up excuses. See if I’m wrong. They’ll probably get the South China Sea, too. Chinese businessmen will continue to lie to us, poison us, and steal our intellectual property with Xi’s help, and we’ll keep buying and buying and buying because America is cursed with submission.

Beijing will probably become the new Rome or London, with a global empire that goes unchallenged for decades or until the beast rises. Who knows? Maybe he’ll be Chinese.

It’s wrong to hate Chinese people for being Chinese, but it’s very good to hate the CCP, and it’s also good to criticize mainland Chinese morals, because they cause a lot of suffering. For example, in mainland China right now, people are cutting dogs up alive and throwing them in boiling water. Look it up. Don’t believe me until you look it up. Also, mainland Chinese are extremely dishonest in business.

The First Amendment has lost a tremendous portion of its power, thanks to the tech kids and people who vote for socialists who give them other people’s property. On top of that, demonic delusion is everywhere, so even when the truth is known, people prefer bizarre theories with no foundation in reality. It’s no coincidence that Q Anon and the flat Earth crazies arose just as the apocalypse began.

One of the great benefits of praying in tongues is that if you do it a lot, the Holy Spirit will lead you out of delusion. As the word says:

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.

Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand.

If you listen to the Holy Spirit, you may draw some bad conclusions, but you will soon recover and know the truth. You’re not going to get the truth from the press, preachers, or the people around you, so you might as well start listening to the source.

In Which Your Host Fails Yet Again to Heed Proverbs 26:4

From time to time, I have written things about Massad Ayoob’s really bad legal advice. He is a non-attorney and freelance writer who worked as a part-time cop in a town containing several times fewer people than a college basketball stadium. He has also worked as an expert witness from time to time, and many people consider him an authority on firearms tactics.

Mr. Ayoob is not a ballistician, gunsmith, engineer, physician, military veteran, or lawyer. He didn’t have gunfights with criminals when he was a cop; if he had, we would never have heard the end of it. Far as I can determine, his education is limited to a bachelor’s degree.

A number of people have given me hell for criticizing the Great Ayoob because he makes videos and writes articles in which he pretends to understand the law. He may be a true expert on protecting yourself with a gun, but he has no business talking about legal matters. He did an inept analysis of the Zimmerman case, and he has also coached people on the things they should say to the police after a shooting. Real attorneys coach them on what they should not say, which is…anything. Ayoob tells people to say nasty things about the deceased and claim innocence, and these are real stupid ideas.

An Internet commenter has accused Ayoob of propagating “Fuddlore” on the web. That is funny. I almost never type this, but LOL.

One thing that bugged me about this man’s uninformed, intractable defenders was that they often claimed he was a legal expert because he had testified in court cases as an expert witness. An expert witness is legally barred from testifying about the law. In a court, attorneys try to tell the judge what the law is (because often, he has no idea), and he makes all rulings of law. No witness gets to butt in. If Matlock himself were giving testimony in a case, and he tried to talk about the law, he would be interrupted and told to knock it off.

You don’t have to be a big brain to be an expert witness. If you go to sites listing the areas in which expert witnesses offer to testify, you will find they list things like marijuana cultivation. In South Florida, a portly local personality and famous fishing captain named Bouncer Smith has worked as an expert. He used to be the voice of the fishing hotline, which I called from time to time for tips on catching dolphin and sailfish. He got in trouble once for refusing to move his boat to help a man who was nearby, drowning. Hey, he had paying customers.

Imagine his expert testimony.

Plaintiff’s Counsel: Dr. Bouncer, let’s say it’s 10 a.m., mid-June, two to four-foot seas, a nice weedline but no birds working, nice color change, sunny, and you’re in 1200 feet of water off Haulover Beach with a heading of 172°. Finger mullet on a bead rig, or a staggered spread of Dolphin Jrs.?

Dr. Bouncer: That’s a trick question! No one uses a bead rig with finger mullet!

Defense Counsel: Bastard!

Would you hire Captain Bouncer to represent you in a divorce?

I looked up some things Ayoob allegedly said about his experience as a witness, and I found them pretty silly, not to mention impossible to believe.

Ayoob said he was a witness in a “court” case involving Christine Hansen, a disgruntled FBI agent, and other members of her class. He said, “I testified. The court listened.”

The obvious implications here are 1) there was a court case, 2) Ayoob testified in court, and 3) the court delivered an order implementing changes based on Ayoob’s remarks.

Today I learned that none of those things are true. There was no court. That’s the thread you pull to unravel the sweater.

Ayoob calls the case Christine Hansen et. al., v. Federal Bureau of Investigation. I used to try to look it up, and I couldn’t find it anywhere. I couldn’t understand why. You can find any federal case online, as long as an opinion was published. Today I found out there was no court, therefore no court case, therefore no Ayoob in-court testimony.

What actually happened, then? Hansen felt women were facing discrimination from the FBI, so she filed an EEOC complaint. Ayoob talked to the EEOC, which is the farthest thing from a court. The EEOC took Hansen’s side to some extent, and it supposedly made recommendations. The DOJ, which owns the FBI, had a special officer named Squire Padgett issue an internal opinion, and in that opinion, he agreed with the EEOC on a number of points, but not all. The DOJ made some changes based on the EEOC’s “recommendations.”

I use quotation marks because I have worked with the EEOC, and I don’t recall seeing them issue recommendations. They make findings and tell people they can sue. Maybe they do make recommendations. It has been a long time, and I have forgotten a lot of what I knew. Making recommendations would carry zero legal weight and add work (the civil servant’s kryptonite), so it would be pointless.

In certain types of employment cases, a plaintiff can’t run out and sue an employer right off the bat. Federal law requires the filing of an EEOC complaint, and after the EEOC makes its findings, it issues a right to sue letter. Then you go to federal court, and the actual case begins. If the EEOC takes too long to issue the letter, you can go to court without it.

The EEOC is kind of a joke. Forcing attorneys to work with it is almost a harassment tactic. They can’t stop lawsuits from going forward. All their investigations do is waste people’s time and money. Lawyers (plaintiffs’ lawyers, anyway) want to get into court and get their money. They are not interested in kissing and making up before the EEOC.

The EEOC has “investigators.” Unless the ones I know about are unusual, they don’t really do anything. I had an investigator call me, an attorney with a clear agenda, asking for facts. This made it unnecessary for this person to get out of a comfortable chair and do real work, and that was probably the goal.

I am amazed to see that Ayoob says he “testified.” I didn’t know the EEOC had hearings with witnesses, and I was an employment lawyer. Maybe I once knew and forgot. I don’t recall having a hearing in any of my cases. The web says they have examiners who function as administrative judges, so the EEOC is apparently like the National Labor Relations Board and the Florida Public Employee Relations Commission.

An administrative hearing is not court, so talking to the EEOC is not court testimony, and your words would presumably be inadmissible hearsay in a court anyway. I believe a court would expect you to show up to testify again. I can’t think of an applicable hearsay exception offhand. I don’t think Ayoob knows the definition of hearsay or how courts feel about it.

Thinking the EEOC is a court would be proof one doesn’t know much about the legal system.

Before my first visit to the EEOC, my dad told me what to expect. He let me know I was in for a laugh. When I arrived, I saw exactly what he described. Big, pleasant women padding around in houseshoes. The office was more like their apartment than a place of business. They had made it downright homey. It was like a slumber party at Oprah’s house.

Walking into a federal courtroom is a lot different. After you show the marshals you’re not armed, you go into a big, cold room where people’s lives are completely destroyed every day, and you wait with armed bailiffs and whoever else works there. You turn your cell phone off, and you check it and recheck it, because God forbid it should ring while Judge Thanos is talking. He may confiscate it and give it to a homeless shelter, and if he’s really nuts, you may get fined or held in contempt. There is no refrigerator with grandchildren’s drawings on it. There are no cookies. Forget about wearing houseshoes.

I can’t find the Hansen documents online. I could look them up somewhere with additional effort, but it would be a pain. What I know, I found in news articles.

The FBI has had problems with female agents, including their physical weakness and their unwillingness or inability to learn how to shoot a 10mm pistol. The FBI’s experts recommended the 10mm in the wake of the famous Miami shootout, which suggested their existing firearms weren’t too good. Female agents and near-men said it was too much for them, so, famously or infamously, the 10mm was cut down for girls and sissies, and the .40 S&W was created.

Anyway, Hansen and the gals complained about a number of things including transfers, assignments, and being weeded out through difficult-for-ladies firearms requirements. They probably complained about sexual harassment, too, because every big organization has a harassment problem.

Obviously, Ayoob couldn’t testify as an expert about everything, so it is extremely unlikely that he was asked about anything other than firearms. No one wants to know what Massad Ayoob thinks about punitive reassignments.

The DOJ’s man, Padgett, supposedly agreed with some or all of the EEOC’s recommendations. Hansen is quoted as saying she was not going to appeal the DOJ’s decision. It was good enough for her.

Did Ayoob persuade Padgett? Maybe, but maybe his input wasn’t needed. Government employers are not known for standing up to feminists. My best guess is that the DOJ planned to buckle from the word “go.” It was the Carter/Reagan era, and times were changing fast. The FBI may have been in the wrong on some issues, the government definitely didn’t want the limitless financial exposure of a trial, and the DOJ probably wanted to score PR points with the public.

If I went outside on a cloudy day and yelled “RAIN!!!”, and then it rained, it wouldn’t mean the clouds listened to me.

I don’t think it would.

The gals got some money, some FBI policies were changed, and the case never went to court. This is what is known as an out-of-court settlement, not a verdict.

Ayoob later made it look like he was very brave to testify, saying something about how he was told (by unnamed persons) his career would be over if he did. This, I do not believe. Maybe a bartender told him that. Maybe his wife told him. Maybe a bored federal prosecutor in a courthouse elevator said it as a prank. No professional would have said it with any seriousness.

No one cares what expert witnesses do. It is understood that they will show up and say whatever their clients want them to, to the greatest extent possible without having their pants, on the witness stand, actually burst into flames. No one ever leaves a courtroom and whispers, “That accountant is DEAD.”

It’s also unclear what repercussions Ayoob expected. Surely he didn’t expect a rendition to a CIA safe house stocked with rubber hoses and, maybe, a VCR and a shelf full of Mork and Mindy tapes.

Actually, that last part might not work on Ayoob, but it would definitely work on me. I would roll on my own mother to avoid hearing Robin Williams say “shazbat” again.

It has been suggested to me that Ayoob might have feared that law enforcement agencies and prosecutors would never hire him to testify again. The problem with that idea is that in criminal cases, he was a defense witness, and the government is not in the defense business. If he really testified in lots of criminal cases, he did so for defendants, against LEO’s and DA’s. If he testified in civil cases involving the government, he worked as a plaintiff’s witness, and the government is not in the business of suing itself.

Look, the government doesn’t need to pay self-taught magazine writers for expert testimony. They generally use people they already employ. People like Dr. Michael Baden and Dr. Martin Fackler. People like “Dr. Lak” in the OJ farce. They don’t have to pay these people insane expert witness fees; they’re already on salary. And they have lots of degrees.

If you’ve seen any criminal cases involving forensic experts, you’ve probably noticed the government’s witnesses were government employees. There must be exceptions, but the government probably never hired Ayoob, and I’m sure it wasn’t making his monthly nut. No DA ever said, “Send the pathologist from Johns Hopkins home! We found a guy who writes for Guns & Ammo!”

The government couldn’t retaliate by refusing to hire him again, because it never hired him to begin with, except to write speeding tickets in New Hampshire. It couldn’t tell lawyers not to hire him, either. First, it would be free advertisement for Ayoob. Second, lawyers would’t pay any attention to the FBI’s requests. Third, there would be ethical problems which would guarantee Ayoob more free advertising. “Hire the man who got 10 prosecutors disbarred!”

It makes no sense to say Ayoob was afraid of offending LEO’s and their pals. He has buddied around with that exact crowd his whole life. It’s strange, but he seems very popular with them even though he has tried to help free people, probably including guilty ones, they strove to imprison.

I don’t know how effective Ayoob was, but all over the US, really good expert witnesses make prosecutors and cops like like morons every day, they never turn up floating in canals or scattered around wood chippers, and they don’t get blackballed. No one cares.

Retaliating against an expert who testified in an EEOC hearing would be like hiring a hitman because you lost a nursing home shuffleboard tournament. “I’ll teach YOU to wax your pucks!!!”

It’s inconceivable to me that he was worried at all. If he was, he was deluded. I think he just wants people to think he’s a hero who took on the MAN and risked it all, when in reality, he was doing what thousands of expert witnesses do every day. Anyone who works in a town with 4 or 5 police officers, puts two bars on each side of his collar, and calls himself Captain Ayoob has to be eyed critically.

From now on, I’m Captain Steve, heading my farm’s private police force. I live alone with Marvin the parrot, so he’s my lieutenant. That makes the wife Officer Rhodah. I won’t tell her Marvin outranks her. I wonder if there is any way I could locate and buy Inspector Clouseau’s Silver Hornet.

Captain? What am I thinking? General. Generalissimo. Generalissimo Esteban.

You’re all errand boys sent by grocery clerks to collect bills.

The more I learn about this guy, the less impressed I am. His legal advice is crazy wrong. I used to think he was a useful source of information on defending myself, but now I question even that. I have read two of his books, and the information in them seemed basic, intuitive, and unproven. Anyone could write 300 pages of his best guesses and call it a treatise. There are zillions of real cops and veterans out there who have actually used firearms successfully, so why would I listen to a guy who has no real-world resume? A good Grand Theft Auto player probably knows more about the subject.

You don’t have to be John von Neumann to come up with good ideas for dealing with burglars.

Let me write a treatise right here, off the top of my head.

Don’t open the door to strangers. Get a camera system and identify everyone who comes to your house. If someone enters your house, lock yourself in a bedroom, call the police, and get your gun ready. If someone enters your yard, stay indoors, call the police, watch from a safe place, and get your gun ready. Do not go outside unless you like being bitten by dogs and shot full of .40 S&W.

Being a he-man sounds exciting, but the cops will do it for nothing, and you get to stay inside, alive, with your cocoa. If someone kills a burglar and gets charged with a crime, it won’t be you. You’ll be safe at home, watching him get the Chauvin treatment on TV. Never engage or even make your presence known unless you have no choice. If you can do it, run away and conceal yourself on another property until the cops arrive.

Use a rifle with a big magazine for home defense. If you use a pistol, you may shoot yourself, you’re likely to miss the burglar, and if you hit him, he may keep right on coming. A good rifle will shred his organs. If you’re really serious, get night vision and kill the lights.

Don’t use a shotgun. They hold too few rounds. If you use a shotgun anyway, use a semiauto. Pumps are unreliable, and they are slow for repeat shots.

Keep your cell phone charged all the time. Keep it on you. Keep shoes, a jacket, a flashlight, and ear protection beside your bed.

Use a pocket holster for concealed carry. Other holsters are very hard to draw from, and they can get you killed. A pocket holster is fast and safe, and you can put your hands in your pockets when confronted without letting anyone know you’re already holding your gun. Carry as much ammunition as you can stand to. No one ever walked away from a gunfight complaining about having too much ammo.

Get a Crimson trace pistol laser. They really work, and they require no brains to operate. They turn on automatically. Get a pistol with no manual safety, because you will forget to disengage a manual safety when you’re scared, and you will look like an idiot confidently pulling the trigger on a gun that won’t fire.

Keep a round in the chamber. You will never remember to rack the slide when you need to.

Learn to shoot well. A .22 short in the middle of the face can better than 10 9mm rounds in nonvital areas such as walls. Practice with whatever you choose to use.

Get bulletproof bedroom and closet doors with gun ports. Why not? Can’t hurt. Your walls won’t stop anything, so you might as well have something.

Carry a really big, really sharp knife. A machete would be good. A pointed sword is better. If you can’t hit the perp with your gun, you will need something else. The general rule with knife fights is that the long knife wins. This is why swords exist.

Buy a big, illegal laser pointer and the proper eye protection. You can blind your burglar from a good distance, and there will be no recoil or reloading to deal with.

Get three really big pit bulls or something similar. Before you shoot, turn them loose. Maybe you can prevent a gunfight, and they will be hell on destructive squirrels and coons.

If you’re the shooter, make someone else call the cops. Everything you say is admissible in court to put you away. You can deny anything someone else says, and it will also be hearsay, which may be excluded from evidence. Meanwhile, call your attorney. When your helper calls 911, they start recording while the phone is still ringing. Keep that in mind. Don’t say, “Remember the lies I told you to tell after I murdered this guy.” Actually, don’t use the advice in this paragraph. I’m not your attorney, and my legal advice may be wrong. See how I’m smarter than Massad Ayoob?

I just made all that stuff up, but it looks pretty good. Is it right? Am I an expert?

Should I write a book? Don’t think so.

Now that I seem to know what actually happened in the FBI case, I think I can rest.