Haiti and Kentucky

Two prayer requests.

First, RE Haiti:

Hi Steve,

The babies from the abandoned baby unit need prayers, They are missing! Pray they are found safe.
Susie Krabacher was on CNN this morning and the url is a link to the interview.
http://www.cnn.com/video/?/video/world/2010/01/20/intv.krabacher.orphan.aid.cnn

Made “tiny” if the link is broke.
http://tinyurl.com/ye58z5b

Missing babies are the part that just breaks my heart.

Thanks,
Cindy

Second, from Kentucky, Heather is asking for help:

Hi Friends,
Just had my appointment with the high risk OB and they believe that the baby has a tumor of some sort on it’s spine. I know I depend on you for prayer for my mom and everything else in my life, but could you please ask the Lord to heal this?
They believe the tumor is non-cancerous, but would require surgery after the birth, which can be so dangerous and I would love to be able to avoid that if possible.
I am scheduled for an MRI on Friday so they can have a better look. That is the same day as mom’s oncologist appointment, and I know that I had already asked you all to pray for a good result with that.
Thank you and God Bless.
Love,
Heather

Have at it.

I Judge You for Judging, Even When You Didn’t

I got some glib, condescending comments about Pat Robertson today. I started to respond, but then I deleted them. I make an effort to check the things I write, and people show up and post judgmental comments that are obviously not supported by a scintilla of research, and they expect me to post them and take the time to respond thoughtfully. They expect me to work much harder than they do, and I get tired of it. If you’re going to argue with me about the Bible, read it first. If you’re going to argue with something I said, make sure I said it. WordPress’s comment page has a Trash link for good reason.

If you didn’t watch the Robertson video, and you didn’t read my blog posts carefully, and you don’t read the Bible, you will not read and consider my comment responses. I am not stupid enough to waste my time researching and writing for people who have proven they won’t benefit from it.

The irony of the Robertson situation is amazing. The people who are condemning him are doing exactly what they falsely accuse him of doing. They don’t watch the video. They have no idea what he said. Still, they condemn him and post lies. Because, in their own minds, they’re better Christians than he. If judging other people’s sins is bad, how bad is it to judge other people for judging, when they never did?

Robertson did not say Haitians deserved what they got. He didn’t even say they brought it on themselves. He did not express happiness over the earthquake. He sent them (and is still sending them) millions of dollars. He prays for them. He shows compassion. He is doing more for Haiti than anyone who is criticizing him, and when he pointed out that idolatry causes problems, he was doing them a kindness, as a Bible-reading Christian should already know: “Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a kindness. And let him reprove me; it shall be an excellent oil which shall not break my head.”

I guess I should point out that I’m quoting the Bible, so the uber-holy folks who don’t actually read the Bible won’t show up in my comments to tell me how stupid the above passage is.

The only thing Pat Robertson can be accused of in good faith is a breach of tact, committed out of love. I wouldn’t even go that far. If my house fell on me and I were worshiping demons, and an evangelist came to dig me out, and while he was doing it, he said, “You’ll be better off if you give up astrology and Santeria,” I’d thank him for the advice. At least I hope I would. I search the Bible and books and sermons for correction, because I know I need it. I am very concerned about the changes I need to make. What’s wrong with a little advice? I mean GOOD advice, not platitudes offered by people who write by reflex.

The left’s bizarre, unbiblical, unchristian, humanist obsession with denying the existence of sin has leached into Christianity, and now Christians think it came from God. Look, sin is bad. It causes problems. Exposing it is a good deed.

Pat Robertson didn’t kill anyone. He didn’t drive anyone to suicide. No one will have to have counseling because of what he said. BUTCH UP already. How did we end up with such stupid priorities? Bodies are rotting under fallen buildings, and people are up in arms over a few words an old man uttered in compassion. Who knows how many Haitians will hear his words, consider them, and be blessed?

I can’t believe I have to defend this guy. I am no fan, but it’s disgusting to see other Christians lie about him like this. Whatever else may be true of him, he gave his life to God, and he has brought millions of people to Christ, and when we get to paradise, they’ll all be there. How many of his ignorant, lying critics have a record like that? You people would have a Bentley crushed because of a scratch on the fender.

Stop telling lies about this man. Give it a rest and focus on helping the Haitians.

I’m not taking comments on this post. Experience has shown that it would be pointless.

Perfect, Mind-Blowing Sicilian Pizza

This is incredible. I can make Sicilian pizza. More than that, I can make the best Sicilian pizza on earth.

I made a pie today, figuring it would only be a good baseline effort. Somewhere to start. But it’s magnificent. If I had only cooked it longer and gone a little heavier on the sauce and cheese, it would have been the finest Sicilian pie imaginable. As it was, it shocked me. The smell that’s lingering in the house is still driving me crazy.

When this happens to me–and it happens a lot–is it luck, or does it mean God cares about good food? There has to be a reason he has given me so many good recipes.

I’ll tell you how to do it.

My local GFS didn’t have Super Dolce sauce, so I used Saporito. I added a little sugar to make it as sweet as Super Dolce. Other than that, I did everything the same. This is for a 12 x 18 rectangle.

INGREDIENTS

4 cups King Arthur bread flour (or any bread flour)
2 teaspoons salt
2 teaspoons pepper
4 rounded teaspoons dry yeast
1 pint water

Activate the yeast in the water. Put the other stuff in a really big food processor. Mine almost died when I did this. You may as well break your dough into two portions and process them separately.

Mix the dry stuff. Start dribbling the water and yeast in. When the dough forms a coherent glob, stop adding water and process for one minute. You want it a little sticky, but you should be able to handle it. Seems like you want as much water in it as you can manage, without ending up with something so loose you can’t make it into a pie.

Form the dough into a smooth glob, oil it heavily, and put it in an oiled dish to rise. Probably best to use a dish that somehow resembles the pizza pan. In other words, round for a round pan, and so on. It will make it easier to make the dough fit the pan.

Punch the dough down when it rises. Let it poof back up a little. The more time it has to rise, the better the flavor will be.

Dump it in an oiled steel pan and mash it until it fits. Make the borders slightly higher than the middle. Don’t overdo it, because you can end up with a pie that’s so tall around the edges, the cheese runs into the middle.

Make sure the top of the dough is oily (light olive oil, not green), and let the dough rise some more. I let mine get up to about 3/4″ in height. You should flip the dough once while you’re making it fit, because this will make the bottom of it lumpy. That will give you wrinkles and air spaces that will give you different degrees of doneness on the bottom of the pie. This is a very good thing.

SAUCE INGREDIENTS

8 oz. Stanislaus Saporito or Super Dolce sauce
2 level teaspoons sugar (Super Dolce) or 3 (Saporito)
1/2 – 1 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon white vinegar

Man, this was good.

1 teaspoon olive oil
2 teaspoons dry oregano – get something decent, not Badia
enough water to make the sauce loose – maybe a cup

I used 3/4 this much sauce, and it wasn’t enough. It might be wise to add a little more oil to the sauce. It got a little dry in the exposed areas, but that may have been because I spread it too thin.

Smear the cheese on top of the pie. Add 16 ounces Costco mozzarella. Cut it with good provolone if you want. I used half provolone on one side of the pie, and it was very good.

Mike was right on the money with the lighter olive oil. I am never using green olive oil on pizza again.

Bake in a 550° preheated oven. I rested my pan on a stone. I gave it 8 minutes, but I should have gone ten. The pan was on the middle rack.

This will be better if you can get the pie to come out so you can give it a couple of minutes on the bare stone, but my stone is too small for that. This dough is sticky, so make sure you use a pan that really works.

I need a smaller pan. The skillet idea comes to mind.

I can’t get over this.

Pizza is a a Lifelong Pursuit

My church is going crazy these days. Unlike the major news outlets, which will be gone from Haiti in a week, we are engaged in a long-term effort, and because of the earthquake, it’s going to be ramped up. All sorts of stuff is happening. They even have me writing copy for them.

Trinity Broadcasting is all over this, and our church is going to be their main resource in the Haiti campaign. I suppose that makes sense, since most of the people who attend are Haitian. On top of that, our pastor has hooked up with Friend Ships Unlimited, and they have a boat on the way from Lake Charles. It’s going to dock in the Port of Miami and go back and forth between Miami and Port au Prince. The people making this stuff happen are working late hours and going without sleep. It’s pretty impressive.

The services this weekend were largely aimed at Haiti. The Saturday service was converted to a time of prayer, and we heard a lot about the crisis in the other services. Attendance was heavy.

One of the church’s pastors–an older gentleman of Haitian descent–was in Port au Prince when the earthquake came. He spoke to us. He said the ground shook for four or five minutes. Ordinarily, he would have been some distance out of town–he only goes to Port au Prince when he’s on the way back to Miami–but on this occasion he was in Port au Prince a day earlier than usual.

He said he was in a hotel, on the second story, when it hit. The ground moved vertically as well as horizontally. He had to hold onto a doorframe. When it was over, he went out in the short street where the hotel was located, and six people were already dead. One was a little girl whose head had been severed. He also found a woman whose hand had been amputated when her fallen ceiling pinned her wrist against her refrigerator door. She was trapped for six hours like that. The hand was severed, but the arm was still trapped. She had to stand and wait while rescuers freed her.

The neighborhood was white with concrete dust. It must have been like 911.

When the quake was over, no one at church knew whether this man was alive or dead. He managed to hitch a ride to Miami on a military flight, and he arrived in the sanctuary without notice, much to everyone’s relief.

We work with Mission of Hope. They have a big campus outside Port au Prince. It was far enough to be spared significant damage. I suppose now it will be bursting with people who need help.

I don’t know all that much about our involvement, because I have never participated in it. I guess that will change. I don’t know what they’ll want me to do.

There are tons of good charities working on this. I doubt it matters which one you help, as long as they check out. If you want to find out about our organization, you can find it at this link.

I still don’t know what’s going on with their plan to put me to work in their cafe. I hope they follow through on their plan to get a pizza oven. I don’t know if it’s practical, though. I rarely eat anything more complicated than cheese pizza, but most people want a lot of toppings, and that makes the whole business much more complex and bothersome.

My flour education never stops. This weekend, I learned some people use flour made from durum wheat, which is the same stuff used to make coarse semolina. You can’t get fine semolina flour around here, as far as I know. Whole Foods doesn’t have it. I’d like to try it. I’ve also learned that Gordon Food Supply sells a brand of flour that’s very high in gluten. That would be fun to try, although if I don’t like it, I’m stuck with a huge bag of useless flour. I’m sure it would be great, but these days, I tend to lean toward low-gluten flour, and by that I mean 3 grams per “serving,” as defined on the label.

I had read that Caputo 00 flour was low in gluten, and I repeated it, but this weekend I found an “expert” website bearing a claim that 00 flour is actually high in gluten. I don’t know what to believe. I guess I could look for a Caputo label, online.

Man, I love the Internet. Apparently, it’s 11.5% gluten, which is high.

I had read that it was low in gluten, and that the things that made it special were its purity and the fineness of the grind, but apparently I was deceived. I don’t like it in pizza, so it doesn’t matter, but I don’t like being wrong, either.

You can get flour that’s 14% gluten. That must be interesting. Sometimes when I make pizza, I add gluten with a spoon, so it’s not like you’re limited to what you get in the bag. Gluten is easy to buy, and it beats working yourself to death trying to find the ultimate flour.

Costco cheese continues to exceed expectations. I have learned that a lot of the things I do to make pizza work are actually necessary only to compensate for bad cheese.

I put white vinegar in my sauce. It turns out the reason I need that is that most cheese has no flavor. With Costco cheese, I can reduce it or omit it. I also add olive oil to my sauce. I didn’t think it had much effect on the cheese, but it does. If I go over a tablespoon in two ounces (weighed as it comes from the can) of Super Dolce sauce, the oil rises up into the cheese and makes the pie too oily. This doesn’t happen with Gordon Food Supply Primo Gusto cheese, but it’s a problem with Costco mozzarella, so I have to drop the olive oil down to a teaspoon or two. It’s good to be able to reduce the olive oil, because the oil I have degrades the taste of the sauce a little. Oil oxidizes in the bottle before you buy it, and I think that gives the sauce a slight cardboard taste. Mike says the answer is lighter, cheaper olive oil, but if the olive oil is reduced, I don’t have to worry about it.

Someone advised me to add cheddar to my cheese. This pumps up the fat content and adds sourness, which you need. Works great with Primo Gusto, but there is no need to do it with Costco cheese. It might be nice to cut it with a good provolone or scamorza, however.

Mike advised me to underlay the mozzarella with grated Romano. Again, it depends on the mozzarella.

I’ve noticed that Costco cheese has a smoky smell. I was afraid I had gotten something on the bag, but it turns out the smell comes from the cheese. I guess it has a fragrance because it’s quality cheese.

I have read that Gordon Food Service will special-order Grande Cheese, but you have to buy a whole 30-pound case. I don’t think it’s worth it. I know it’s fantastic cheese, but things are going so well now, what’s the point?

I may run up to GFS and get more sauce to freeze. I plan to make more frozen dough portions. They don’t save time, because it takes a couple of hours to turn frozen dough into a pie. But they do minimize the mess and the work. If you can plan a meal three hours ahead, frozen dough will work for you. If you have to have pizza faster than that, because you can’t anticipate the need, forget it.

You’re better off planning ahead and freezing dough or refrigerating it for a day, because the flavor and texture will improve a little as the dough sits. If I could manage to make sourdough portions, I’d be in paradise. You can’t do that on the spur of the moment. Freezing and sourdough crust go together naturally. I should order some starter.

I could also freeze dough for garlic rolls, although I don’t know if I’d ever use it. A small pizza is a reasonable meal. It won’t make you fat. Add two garlic rolls, and you’re way over budget. Maybe on rare occasions I could fix myself three or four rolls, but it’s risky.

Freezing entire pizzas would be great, but you need a very big vacuum sealer. I don’t see it happening.

The major breakthrough that made all this possible was the decision to use the food processor to knead dough. If I had to use my hands or a mixer, I would never have been willing to make pizza often enough to learn anything. The food processor turns it into a three-minute job, from kneading the dough to putting the food processor parts in the dishwasher. The actual kneading is a little over a minute, and the dough is perfect.

Sooner or later I need to get my Sicilian working. I never found a steel pan I liked. Maybe the best thing is to use a big cast iron skillet. If I dedicate one to pizza, I’ll be able to develop a finish that will assure stick-free crusts. I can make excellent thick-crust pizzas just by using more dough in my regular recipe, but I like the pan-baked crusts they make in New York. They’re a little oily and very crunchy on the outside. My thick crusts are plain old pizza crusts. Wonderful, but not Sicilian. Ordinary pizza crust is like baked bread, which must be why you have to use a stone. A stone lets the crust dry as it bakes. Sicilian is sort of fried on the bottom.

This stuff never ends. But it’s okay. I remember a time when my pizza was disgusting. Now it’s always great; the only issue is whether it has the precise characteristics I imagine before I make it.

The Future is Ours

I had to skip piano practice on Friday because I was busy working on Haiti stuff for my church, but last night, I got back to work. I took out my book of Bach sinfonias and inventions and worked on sight-reading. It was remarkable. I went maybe an hour and a half, and it was not particularly tedious, and it got easier and easier as time passed. I did not make music by any stretch of the imagination, but I felt like something had broken loose and I was finally on my way.

This happens when you try to develop skills. I remember reaching a point in my physics studies where things started to flow. The variables seemed to move around on their own, instead of requiring me to push them. And when I used to play the guitar, I got to a point where my hands sometimes took off by themselves.

The only other skill in which I have this feeling is writing, and the breakthrough has become permanent, because I stuck with it. I write effortlessly now. I don’t think about it. It just appears on the screen. If I could get to the point where I could compose like that, it would be as great a gift as I could ask for. Writing is great, but it’s an extremely difficult skill to market, and unless you hit it big, you don’t touch many people or accomplish anything worthwhile. I’d get more satisfaction out of creating music. I can get words out of my head just fine. The music is still stuck in there.

I screwed up when I was studying physics, even though I had reached the point where I was working pretty fluently. I got burned out after several years of accelerated study, and I couldn’t catch myself no matter what I did. The people at the University of Texas could not have cared less. They didn’t want a troubled student inconveniencing them, so they gave me no help, and they waited for me to give up. I’m sure they were relieved when I quit.

I think I would have been fine had I listened to my own mind. I had found that the way to solve problems was to stop thinking and wait for the solutions to appear through creativity, not analysis. That was the most reliable thing I had going for me. Stop thinking, and wait. But I couldn’t make myself rely on it. It was too weird.

I’m wrong; that wasn’t the real answer. Ultimately, the problem was that I was away from God, so I had plenty of enemies but no help. I prayed, but I didn’t try to change my life fundamentally. So nothing happened. It was as though the ceiling were made of brass and the prayers bounced off of it.

What an idiot. I was in Texas; there were probably great churches all around me. But it didn’t occur to me that I needed to go in and recommit myself to God and get the help I needed.

God will let you flounder and suffer. Under some circumstances, he will let you die while you wander in confusion. You can’t always expect him to wipe your nose for you. I was in a mess because I had done something stupid. I knew better. I had no right to expect to be rescued.

People let me down, too. I’m sure there were people who were supposed to pray for me and reach out to me, but they blew it off. Fixing the world is our responsibility, even though God gives us the power to do it. Bad things happen because there aren’t enough of us on the job.

When I left my church in Miami before taking up physics, I didn’t get persistent calls, asking if I was okay. People didn’t come to see about me. The friends I had made didn’t bang on my door and ask to pray for me. Now that church doesn’t exist. No surprise. Church isn’t primarily about getting miracles and prosperity and growing a giant congregation and getting on TV. I think those are things too many charismatic churches focus on, and that was definitely the case when I was involved twenty years ago. Church is about seeking God’s face and doing what is right. My church wasn’t there for people who needed help, and God wasn’t there for my church. He let it dry up and vanish.

I blew it. My pastor blew it. The other members of the church blew it. I ended up wasting about eighteen years, and during that time, my mother got lung cancer, and my sister continued the smoking habit that eventually gave her lung cancer, and things went badly for my family.

I don’t condemn anyone. It seems like the body of Christ has been burdened with ignorance for about 1900 years–blinded like Samson–and things are still being restored. I know the people in my old church would have done the right things, had they been better informed. I sure would have. I can’t condemn them, when my own performance has been so bad.

Unity is important. Predators usually won’t plunge into cohesive herds. They look for animals that wander off on their own. It’s stupid to think the mission of a church is to build a big facility and get lots of video coverage for a fast-talking pastor who hawks dubious DVDs with his leering, comb-overed photo on the boxes. You look after the members first, and you try to do God’s will. A church is made of members, not bricks. Let Satan get at the members, and the church will fall.

The church I go to now does a better job of binding its members together. There are lots of prayer groups. There are activities and outreaches that get people together. It could be better (and I know it will be), but it beats what I’ve seen in the past.

Piano practice is going well. Lots of things are going well. I think things that have been taken from me in the past will be restored as time goes by. Maybe not everything, but many things. Then when my life is over, I’ll be free from the struggle forever. The vicious, parasitic spirits that torment us like horseflies seem powerful now, but they will be like ticks and worms compared to us, and they won’t be able to follow us where we’re going.

It’s a good deal. Freedom from persecution, and public execution for our enemies. You can’t beat that. We’ll be like Mordecai and Esther, living in safety and peace while Haman and his dead sons were publicly impaled on high poles.

Shame on Us

This morning’s prayer group was phenomenal. Oddly enough, the regular leader was out of town, and the guy who led the meeting is Haitian. He has family in Haiti; he still doesn’t know exactly what’s going on with them, and he is very concerned. Guess what he talked about? Ezekiel 33. Read it. If you think Pat Robertson was wrong to say what he did, imagine how you’d feel if he had read this chapter aloud on his TV show. Here is an excerpt:

1 And the word of the LORD came to me, saying, 2 “Son of man, speak to the sons of your people and say to them, ‘If I bring a sword upon a land, and the people of the land take one man from among them and make him their watchman, 3 and he sees the sword coming upon the land and blows on the trumpet and warns the people, 4 then he who hears the sound of the trumpet and does not take warning, and a sword comes and takes him away, his blood will be on his own head. 5 ‘He heard the sound of the trumpet but did not take warning; his blood will be on himself. But had he taken warning, he would have delivered his life. 6 ‘But if the watchman sees the sword coming and does not blow the trumpet and the people are not warned, and a sword comes and takes a person from them, he is taken away in his iniquity; but his blood I will require from the watchman’s hand.’

That goes way beyond what I feel entitled to say. I just said idolatry causes severe problems, and that it’s a good idea to knock it off.

Funny thing; one of the other guys in the group is Haitian, and he disapproved of Robertson’s words, while agreeing that it was appropriate to talk about Ezekiel 33.

The guy who led the group was a great choice. He knows the Bible really well, and he has tremendous enthusiasm and sensitivity. One of the best things about church is meeting people who stand beside you and reinforce you in your walk. I’m so glad I’m not limited to an hour and a half a week, sitting in a pew, completely passive.

Tonight I’ll be helping with PR, as we reach out to Haiti. Should be interesting.

Blogging Skills are Actually Useful on Rare Occasions

I contacted my church to see if they needed help during the Haiti crisis. BIG mistake. Now I’m cranking out copy for their website and trying to help them get a blog going. The PR lady at the church says she has been sleeping two hours a night. They’re going to be doing a lot of work, partnering with charities, TBN, and ministries.

Not sure why they didn’t call me instead of waiting, but there it is.

Hope I can be of use.

Partnership

My pastor says they can use my help with their Haitian relief effort, but as yet, I have no idea what form that help will take. Hopefully it will not be something that results in me fainting from exerting myself while this virus lingers. Although that would make for a good Youtube.

On Twitter, he reports that Trinity Church will be partnering with Friend Ships Unlimited. That will be interesting. Apparently they’ll be working out of the Port of Miami.

Plus Pizza Ruminations

Tragedy is always with us. Back to lighter topics.

I had a big–HUGE–breakthrough last night while practicing the piano.

I recently decided to resume piano, but instead of trying to learn pieces, my only goal was to learn to sight-read fluently. If you can’t sight read (and you’re not a savant), you can’t truly understand music, and composing will be very tough. It will be like using the hunt-and-peck method to type a novel. That’s not the only reason I wanted to learn. My memory just isn’t good enough to allow me to store piano pieces over the long term. I was advised to learn to sight read in order to be develop the ability to play things I had learned in the past. The sheet music helps you over the rough spots.

For weeks, I’ve been using a boring sight-reading book for an hour a day. That’s all I could stand. I put in fifteen minutes of note reading with each hand, and I also did half an hour of timing training.

I got to the point where the book was frustrating. There was very little material in it, and I had a problem with the exercises getting into my memory. Once that happens, you’re not sight-reading. You’re playing from memory, so your sight-reading skills get no workout.

I moved on to a boring book of horrendous Bach pieces, plus a book of easy classics. That helped a lot, but I was frustrated because I wasn’t yet mixing note-reading with timing practice. When I practiced timing, I used the sight-reading book, which features a bunch of exercises using one “A” key for each hand. When I practiced note reading, I ignored the timing, because I couldn’t focus on timing and finger placement at the same time.

Last night I found some very simple pieces in my books, and I started putting the notes and timing together. It works. I played abominably, but I managed to get through the measures. I only used one hand, but it was still great progress. Now I don’t have to suffer with separate exercises for notes and timing, and what I play sort of resembles music, so it’s not as boring. It goes much faster, and it’s much more satisfying to do. And I’m not forced to rely on a training book. Instead of gritting my teeth and quitting the instant the timer rings, I enjoy this enough to go past an hour. That should make a gigantic difference in my progress.

I’d like to write some Christian music. The industry seems to be in a slump right now. It could use a shot in the arm. Maybe I could make a contribution. I ask God for his help all the time. I ask him to help me master music. It seems to be paying off. Whether or not I ever publish anything, at least I’ll be able to read music properly and write it without struggling. That’s a tremendous gift. I’m thrilled about it. Last night, in my head, I heard the wildest variation on Vince Guaraldi’s “Linus and Lucy.” I’d love to put it in MIDI form, just for fun. Can’t do that if I can’t write music.

Christian music sounds dull, right? Wrong. Amazing Grace. Handel’s Messiah. Good Christian music appeals to everyone. Only the lame stuff is dull.

What else is going on? I still struggle with pizza. I flirted with cheddar for a while, but then I got some more Costco mozzarella, and I felt like a philanderer. That’s some cheese, that Costco cheese. Might be better if it had a little more sourness to it, but it’s just about perfect. Adding cheddar is just about pointless. I can use it straight.

The problem with that is that it affects the sauce. Mike advised me to use white vinegar in my tomato sauce, and it works, but recent pizzas lead me to suspect that the main reason the vinegar is necessary is the inadequacy of the cheese. When I use Costco cheese, I have to cut way back on the vinegar. Today I plan to make a pie with no vinegar at all. It’s not gluttony. It’s research. I am actually looking forward to eating something else for lunch. I love pizza and I want it constantly (even while I’m asleep), but even a small one makes it necessary for me to watch my intake for the rest of the day, and it makes my diet unbalanced.

Another odd thing: better cheese seems to reduce the need for sauce.

I’m thinking I might start making tiny pizzas with half a cup of flour, but here’s a funny fact: to test a recipe, you need a certain amount of food. One bite doesn’t tell you much. A 12″ pizza is about the minimum for a quality trial. If I halve the flour, I’ll end up with pizzas about 8 1/2″ in diameter, which is not too bad, but not optimal.

The dough is also on my mind. I’ve been using bread flour and no fat, and then I’ve been putting olive oil on the outside of the dough so it won’t crack when I toss it. But I had a lot of great biscuit-flour pizzas in the past, and I’m wondering if I should try it again, with the oil on the outside. Low-gluten biscuit flour tends to crack more easily than bread flour, so it may be a challenge.

Today I’m going to make a biscuit-flour pie with little or no vinegar in the sauce. I guess I’ll learn something.

It’s good that I exist to do all this testing. I think I’m bringing the world valuable information. Imagine having to do all this for yourselves.

To the best of my knowledge, pizza is the single hardest food to make well. I have never come across another culinary challenge that even came close. I suppose this is fitting, because pizza is the best food there is. Some would say it’s wrong to claim one food is better than all others. That it’s subjective. No; pizza is king. That is an absolute truth, predating the creation of the universe. If I denied it, my head would explode.

Blood Needed

According to news reports, there is a big need for blood donations after the Haiti earthquake. I’m going to see if they’ll have me. I don’t know if I can donate while I’m getting over a virus. I suppose everyone who reads this will already be aware of the need, but it can’t hurt to point it out.

My church is soliciting donations, but I didn’t know that when I heard about the quake. I always go to World Vision when I hear about a need like this. We are having some kind of prayer service tomorrow. I feel kind of useless because I’m still taking it pretty easy while the virus wears off.

It turns out the vast majority of the church is Haitian. I knew there were a lot of them there, but I wasn’t sure it was that big a segment. Maybe there will be a way for me to get involved, beyond prayer and donations.

It’s amazing how vulnerable people in certain countries are. They suffer terribly from problems that are easily avoided. In Africa, tiny children go blind all the time simply because their mothers don’t wash their faces. The Haitian tragedy could have been averted with rebar and adherence to building codes. We have a big problem with Haitians drowning in the Gulf Stream, because they get on overloaded boats without taking flotation devices and without learning to swim. How do you explain a thing like that? How can an adult do a thing like that in 2010? Cubans cross the Stream, too, but they usually bring fresh water and things that float. An empty gallon jug retrieved from Haiti’s inexhaustible supply of litter can keep you alive until someone spots you. It’s not like there is an economic barrier preventing people from taking basic steps to protect themselves.

One remarkable thing about the earthquake is that it killed people from other nations. If you go to Haiti as a charity worker, you may end up living in a structure that isn’t sound, so when an earthquake comes, you’re no better off than the locals. Where, then, are the relief workers staying today? I’d be happy to go over and help, but you couldn’t get me to sleep inside a Haitian building. You don’t have this problem when they get hurricanes and floods. An earthquake is worse. Aftershocks can keep killing after the main event.

Haiti is cursed. I don’t care who doesn’t believe it. I come from a place that is under a curse–a white rural ghetto that receives missionaries from other parts of America–and I am not afraid to say there are other places with the same problem. The only permanent answer to Haiti’s problems is the eradication of demon worship. The PC crowd doesn’t want to offend by mentioning the real problem. They’d rather shoot the messenger than acknowledge the cause of the suffering. I don’t care. In the end, they will not be my judges. They are enablers. I have no respect for their half-baked opinions. They’re wrong about everything else. This is just business as usual.

Put This in His Personnel File

Here’s a Bible lesson for people who think it’s wrong for a Christian to criticize another religion. It’s an excerpt from the first book of Kings.

So Obadiah went to King Ahab and told him, and Ahab set off to meet Elijah. When Ahab saw him, he said, “So there you are–the worst troublemaker in Israel!”

“I am not the troublemaker,” Elijah answered. “You are–you and your father. You are disobeying the LORD’s commands and worshiping the idols of Baal. Now order all the people of Israel to meet me at Mount Carmel. Bring along the 450 prophets of Baal and the 400 prophets of the goddess Asherah who are supported by Queen Jezebel.”

So Ahab summoned all the Israelites and the prophets of Baal to meet at Mount Carmel. Elijah went up to the people and said, “How much longer will it take you to make up your minds? If the LORD is God, worship him; but if Baal is God, worship him!” But the people didn’t say a word.

Then Elijah said, “I am the only prophet of the LORD still left, but there are 450 prophets of Baal. Bring two bulls; let the prophets of Baal take one, kill it, cut it in pieces, and put it on the wood–but don’t light the fire. I will do the same with the other bull. Then let the prophets of Baal pray to their god, and I will pray to the LORD, and the god who answers by sending fire–he is God.”

The people shouted their approval.

Then Elijah said to the prophets of Baal. “Since there are so many of you, you take a bull and prepare it first. Pray to your god, but don’t set fire to the wood.”

They took the bull that was brought to them, prepared it, and prayed to Baal until noon. They shouted. “Answer us. Baal!” and kept dancing around the altar they had built. But no answer came.

At noon Elijah started making fun of them; “Pray louder! Hi is a god! Maybe he is day-dreaming or relieving himself, or perhaps he’s gone off on a trip! Or maybe he’s sleeping, and you’ve got to wake him up!” So the prophets prayed louder and cut themselves with knives and daggers, according to their ritual, until blood flowed. They kept on ranting and raving until the middle of the afternoon; but no answer came, not sound was heard.

Then Elijah said to the people, “Come closer to me.” and they all gathered around him. He set about repairing the altar of the LORD which had been torn down. He took twelve stones, one for each of the twelve tribes named for the sons of Jacob, the man to whom the LORD had given the name Israel With these stones he rebuilt the altar for the worship of the LORD. He dug a trench around it, large enough to hold about four gallons of water. Then he placed the wood on the altar, cut the bull in pieces, and laid it on the wood. He said, “Fill four jars with water and pour it on the offering and the wood.” They did so, and the said, “Do it again”–and they did. “Do it once more,” he said–and they did. The water ran down around the altar and filled the trench.

At the hour of the afternoon sacrifice the prophet Elijah approached the altar and prayed, “O LORD, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, prove now that you are the God of Israel. and that I am your servant and have done all this at your command. Answer me, LORD, answer me, so that this people will know that you, the LORD, are God and that you are bringing them back to yourself.”

The LORD sent fire down, and it burned up the sacrifice, the wood, and the stones, scorched the earth and dried up the water in the trench.

When the people saw this, they threw themselves on the ground and exclaimed. “The LORD is God; the LORD alone is God!”

Elijah ordered, “Seize the prophets of Baal; don’t let any of them get away!” The people seized them all, and Elijah led them down to Kishon Brook and killed them.

Man, that Elijah was intolerant and backward. I wonder who put him up to that.

Strait is the Gate and Small the Tent

I don’t know what to say about my eye exam.

On the one hand, I’m having a bad eye day. Some days I see better than others, and today is not a good day. On the other, the doctor said my vision was very good. No need of correction.

I can’t help being bummed out when I remember the way I used to see, but I’m so much luckier than most people, I should be celebrating.

After the exam, I helped the dockmaster at my dad’s marina fix a shore cable, and he told me his daughter was diagnosed with a retinal blastoma. This is a cancer that strikes very young kids. Typically, it’s discovered when the pupil of one eye looks white in a photo. The tumors are white, and they’re on the retina, so a flashbulb brings them out.

She has had 40 operations and only sees out of one eye. I had thirty years of vision better than most people will ever experience, and even now, apart from some farsightedness, I’m better off than most teenagers.

If you want to say a prayer for this girl, be my guest. I don’t know her name.

I got some angry comments when I asserted that Pat Robertson was right to suggest Haiti was under a curse because of idolatry. He’s a strange guy, and I would not call myself an admirer, but I can’t fault him for humbly and compassionately expressing his sadness about a nation that has a history of indulging in a dangerous practice. I would also remind people that he did so while helping funnel millions of dollars to Haiti.

People say he blamed the Haitians and that he said they deserved what they got, but that’s not what he said in the video. The accusations about Robertson appear to be stupid, deliberate, vicious lies. Nothing new there. If they are deliberate lies, the people who are spewing this propaganda are guilty of something much worse than suggesting a nation needs to turn to God.

One of Satan’s best tricks is turning evil into good and good into evil. We’re seeing it more and more now. If you caution people against homosexuality, because you care about them and you know it leads to misery, you’re not showing kindess; no, you’re a hate-filled bigot who likes seeing people die from AIDS. If you say it’s wrong for teachers to show your kids the “safe” way to fornicate, you’re not a responsible parent; you’re a freak who wants to condemn kids to death by projecting your backward sexual hangups onto them. If you think a seven-month fetus shouldn’t be torn apart without anaesthesia for the convenience of an irresponsible mother, you’re not protecting babies; you’re persecuting the sexually enlightened and forcing unwanted babies to live in anguish. And if you say Satan worship leads to misery, you’re punishing victims of a totally random tragedy. Like the many totally random tragedies that inexplicably strike Haiti just about every year while missing the other half of the island on which Haiti sits.

Jesus told us that before he returned to earth, it would be as it was in the days of Noah. What were those days like? Humanity was so perverse, God was willing to wipe it from the face of the earth and start over. The Talmud tells us the final straw was the forming of marriage contracts between people and animals. The one righteous man on earth, Noah, was a laughingstock (until it started raining).

We’re headed that way again. Perversion and arrogance and self-love are virtues. Exposing sin–one of the most helpful things you can do, and something the Bible requires us to do, proactively–is “hate.” Up is down. Day is night. Noah would feel right at home.

Whether or not Pat Robertson is right to suspect the current catastrophe is linked to Satan worship, he’s right to say Haitians need to turn from it. Satan is real, and he is powerful. He gets his due, with interest, and that means disease, violence, natural disasters, poverty, and every other ill imaginable. In short, it means your life will probably be like life in Haiti. God wants people to turn away from Satan so he can protect and bless them, and every Christian should be proud to say so.

Jesus was not tolerant, in the modern, amoral sense of the word. He was forgiving. It’s not the same thing. He didn’t associate with sinners because what they were doing was okay. He associated with them because they needed him more than other people; he said that, himself. He never said, “Your sins are forgiven, and it’s okay if you keep sinning.” He said, “go and sin no more.” He would not have held hands with Buddha and Mohammed and said they were basically colleagues. The most likely thing is that he sent both of them to hell, along with millions of their dupes. He spoke about hell. It’s a real place. He made it clear that many people were headed there. He made it clear that he was the only ticket out. Tolerance was the furthest thing from his mind. He didn’t even tolerate Jews he thought were in error; why would anyone think he would have tolerated voodoo?

The real meaning of tolerance is that you put up with something. It doesn’t mean you endorse it. We have warped the meaning of the word to make it synonymous with approval.

We are told that if we don’t warn people about their error, their blood is on our heads. If that is true, how can it be wrong to criticize idolatry? Ignoring egregious, perilous sin is like refusing to tell someone you saw a melanoma on his back or a rattlesnake under his bed. It’s not “tolerant.” It’s selfish, lazy, and cowardly.

Christianity is an exclusive faith. It does not allow for the possibility that other faiths are anything but evil. The New Testament makes that clear, over and over. The notion that there are other ways to be saved is a hundred percent contrary to Christianity. People choose not to think about this, because it’s inconvenient and makes them unpopular, but it’s undeniable. They have the strange idea that Christianity can be modernized and improved by removing the exclusivity, but if you believe that, you believe Jesus himself was wrong. That makes you a very funny kind of Christian, at best.

People who tell the truth about God are always persecuted. Jesus told us to expect it. It’s normal. It’s evidence that they’re right. If your goal is to please God, you have to set aside your hopes of being popular. It’s not going to happen. You can’t have it both ways. Jeremiah was beaten and imprisoned. Jesus was crucified. Zechariah was murdered. Micaiah was jailed. Elijah was hunted like an animal. Noah’s neighbors reviled him. Nehemiah had to work with a sword in one hand, because his enemies were a constant threat. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were bound and thrown into a furnace. Mordecai and the Jews of ancient Persia were threatened with genocide for refusing to treat a man like an idol. Ten of the original disciples were martyred, as was the one who replaced Judas. Paul was martyred. Stephen was martyred. The Romans used Christians as torches. The Bible could almost be described as a collection of tales about religious persecution. The fact that we make people angry does not mean we’re wrong. If we did not make people angry from time to time, it would mean something was amiss.

This is not our world. It belongs to Satan, and we are foreign insurgents. Every Gideon Bible is like an IED. A Christian in this world is like a festering splinter in a person’s body. The world becomes inflamed and tries to expel us, and sometimes, it succeeds. It’s normal. Jesus told us we would be hated, and that the world had hated him first. Did he lie?

The same idea that drives voodoo drives the tolerance craze. Voodoo practitioners believe you can alloy Christianity with demon worship, and that by doing so, you get the benefits of both. The tolerance pushers think you can be a good Christian while condoning everything the non-Christian world approves of. It doesn’t work that way. You’re on one side of the fence or the other. You cannot reconcile Christianity with secular values. No way.

It’s no wonder the tolerance crowd is mad at Pat Robertson. He’s criticizing idolatry, and in their hearts, idolatry is what they want for themselves. They want to be worldly Christians, serving themselves and other gods and Jesus. You can’t do that. Read the First Commandment.

I regret the many things that I’ve done that amount to idolatry. I wish I had been warned about them earlier. I wish I were more aware of my current chronic errors, and I pray regularly for God to show them to me. I wish I had been raised in a real Christian home, so I would not have made so many mistakes. The Bible tells us to do unto others as we would have them do unto us. Add it all together, and the conclusion I draw is that it’s good to warn people when they make mistakes. It’s what I wish people had done for me. The psalms say “Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a blessing. And let him reprove me: it shall be an excellent oil which shall not break my head.” There is nothing self-righteous about warning people, any more than pulling someone into a lifeboat is self-righteous. It’s what you do, when you care.

On a per capita basis, Christians will probably send more money to Hait–unconditionally–than any other group, with the possible exception of Jews. When the critics can match that performance, I’ll listen to their tolerance spiel.

No, not even then.

Nouveau Christianity Says “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”

I can’t believe the responses I’m getting to my post about Pat Robertson, who pointed out that Haiti is cursed because of idolatry.

Curses on entire nations are as scriptural as the Ten Commandments. I can’t believe any Christian would say otherwise. I can think of a number of examples without opening a Bible.

1. Egypt was cursed because of the enslavement of the Jews. The nation endured ten plagues, including the slaying (by God) of all the firstborn males. Think about that. God himself killed young male children in Egypt, by the hundreds of thousands. God killed BABIES. Nice touchy-feely uber-tolerant liberal God, right?

2. God punished the Jews by allowing the Babylonians to blind the king, castrate his descendants, and take the cream of the population to Babylon in chains.

3. According to prophecy, God is going to punish the nations that divide Israel, and it’s not going to be a mild punishment. It’s going to involve death and unbearable suffering, on a grand scale.

If you want to suggest God doesn’t do these things any more, you’ll have to provide scripture. Prophecy says he is going to slaughter people IN PERSON, with the sword of his mouth. If he has changed, how can that be true? Prophecy is about the future.

I can’t believe people think God doesn’t punish sin. Do you want a list? Adam. Eve. Satan. Cain. Nebuchadnezzar. Ananias. Sapphira. The sons of Eli. Shiloh. Sodom. Gomorrah. Ahab. Jezebel. David. Absalom. Herod. Judas. How many do you want? Samson. Samson’s tormentors. Goliath. Go ahead; say “when.” Belshazzar. Everyone who lived before the flood, except Noah’s family. Pharaoh. Korah.

Look, this is ridiculous. It’s like arguing about whether Jesus was Jewish. I’m so obviously right, I shouldn’t have to point it out. Shut me up, and the Bible will still make it clear.

If it’s wrong to say someone is under a curse, then every evangelist should be silenced. Every time an evangelist tells someone to come to Christ, he is saying that person is under a curse. If you haven’t accepted Jesus, you are under a curse. That is the central issue of Christianity. If you don’t believe in curses, you are not a Christian, because you don’t believe anyone needs salvation.

If Pat Robertson says that, should we condemn him? It’s no different from what he said about Haiti. Caribbean idol worship is a great, great evil, and every Christian has an obligation to warn people when they’re in peril. How can any Christian argue with that?

I’ve said many times that I believed my family had been under a curse. Do you think I hate my family? I’ve said it about myself. Surely no one thinks I hate myself, or that I don’t want the best for myself.

Maybe idolatry isn’t the reason for the Haitian earthquake, but it is an invitation to disaster, and criticizing voodoo is a righteous act. Voodoo is evil, and it should be eradicated, and no Christian should be afraid to say so.

2,000 Years Later, his Followers are Still At It

I just saw the video of Pat Robertson saying Haiti was under a curse because Haitians had made a pact with the devil. Commenters on Drudgebart.tv were generally furious with him.

Someone explain this to me. I’m not sure Robertson has both oars in the water, but it is undeniably true that the prevailing religion in Haiti is demon worship, better known as voodoo. God exists. Satan exists. God is the good one. Satan is the bad one. What, exactly, is wrong with what Robertson said? I can understand atheists and voodoo practitioners getting upset, but what about ordinary Americans? Most of us claim to be Christians, and that means we believe in God and Satan.

Why do people think it’s an insult to say someone is under a curse? How is this different from saying a person has cancer or that he needs to have his brake lights fixed so he doesn’t have an accident? When people are in trouble, you speak up, don’t you? Isn’t that the kindest thing you can do?

I’m fairly sure the largest ethnic group at my church is made up of Haitians. I’ll bet none of them are mad at Pat Robertson today. They probably tell their relatives the same thing all the time, trying to help them get free. Christians have historically pumped gigantic amounts of money and manpower into Haiti, and they’re heavily involved in the current disaster response. You can’t say that about random Internet commenters who showed up today to bash Pat Robertson. He’s amassing donations and providing humanitarian aid. What are the commenters doing?

Mention Satan or sin, and get smacked down. Nothing new there. If anything, the venomous and irrational responses are evidence that Christians are right.

When did we stop believing in Satan and demons? It’s so sad. Most American Christians think Jesus was a really nice guy–probably gay–who preached unconditional love and was basically insane. In reality, he was a warrior who battled Satan and planted the seed that doomed his kingdom.

Mindless tolerance was not his message. There is a difference between forgiveness and tolerance. He condemned sin, and he condemned all religions other than his own. He would condemn voodoo and santeria and other forms of demon worship, in terms much stronger than those used by Pat Robertson.

Jesus talked about Satan day in and day out. He knew he was real. He had conversations with demons, including Satan himself. He cast them out of people who would be misdiagnosed as blind, deaf, and epileptic today. If Jesus were here in the flesh, the Drudgebart commenters would hate him as much as they hate Pat Robertson.

Link

World Vision is already on it. Click to donate.

Sometimes I think that if you want a glimpse of what life will be like in the Tribulation, you only have to go to a nation where demon worship or atheism prevail. Look at Burma and Haiti.