Mom Pizza
January 26th, 2010Not for Me
People are sending me links to a story about making pizza in a cast iron skillet.
I appreciate the information, but my Sicilian literally could not be any better, and I don’t have to go through all those gymnastics to make it. I do it the same simple way pizzerias do it. On top of that, I can make it any size I want and any shape I want, as long as I can find a thin pan in the desired size and shape. With a skillet, you’re stuck with skillet-size, skillet-shaped pizza. Would you serve a 9″ pizza to four friends? I’d probably be killed for that. I can make an 18″ square pizza, just like the pros.
The skillet pizza reminds me of the “mom hamburger” Eddie Murphy used to talk about. His friends would go to McDonald’s, and his mom wouldn’t let him go. She’d make him a burger at home, with Wonder Bread. He’d be in the yard with his mushy bread, trying to keep the meat from falling out, and his buddies would be at McDonald’s, having what they actually wanted. This is what most homemade pizza is like. I’ve made many bad homemade pizzas; I know the pain.
If you use my methods for Sicilian and thin pizza, you’ll do very little work, you won’t use up a lot of time, and you’ll get pizza just like what you buy on the street in Manhattan, only–in most cases–better. It’s hard for me to see any reason to try another way.
I belong to a pizza forum. These people use language I don’t even understand. They talk about “hydration,” and how you have to have a certain precise amount of water in the dough to make it work. You know how I measure the water in my dough? I poke it with my finger. It’s always–ALWAYS, I’m saying–perfect. Making pizza is extremely hard; why make it worse by requiring people to buy burettes and gram scales?
Here’s something I’ve noticed in life. When people obsess about the equipment they use for a task, and they get drawn into a thicket of details, very often it means they’re not getting good results, because they don’t know what they’re doing. Oscar Peterson could make fantastic music on an upright piano; it’s the amateurs who think they have to have a Fazioli.
When I was wandering lost in the pizza wilderness, I worried a lot about equipment and so on. Now I know that stuff doesn’t matter. I have a screen, a stone, and the right ingredients. I’m golden.
Try my method. All you need are a stone, a screen or some semolina, a peel, and a food processor. Get Stanislaus sauce. Get Costco or Grande cheese, or buy sliced whole milk mozzarella at a deli. Use my recipe. You’ll win every time. Well, you might have a few false starts, but you’ll win every time, after that.
Sometimes people complain that they tried one of my recipes and it didn’t work. This almost always means they thought they were smarter than me, and they changed something. If you use my pizza recipe, follow it to the letter at first. Don’t ruin it the first time out. Once you get it to work, THEN you can change it to suit your tastes. It really works. If not, you’re the problem.
You don’t need special flour. It doesn’t matter what your tap water is like, unless it’s truly disgusting. You don’t need a special oven. Just make sure you have top-notch tomato sauce and cheese, and you’ll be fine.
Maybe the skillet pizza is great. I have no motivation to find out. When you have Sophia Loren at home, why go on a blind date?
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“Sometimes people complain that they tried one of my recipes and it didn’t work. This almost always means they thought they were smarter than me, and they changed something.”
I read that, and it occurred to me that God probably says the same thing all the time. Often, about ME.
January 26th, 2010 at 10:47 AM
Here’s my testimony to the Steve H. original thin pizza. Take a look.
http://lifeinthegreatmidwest.blogspot.com/2009/01/go-figure.html
Years ago I followed the instructions and have been producing the same fabulous pizza each and every time thanks to you Steve.
This weekend the Sicilian style will be tried and there is no doubt it will turn out just as good.
January 26th, 2010 at 11:23 AM
Thanks for the testimony. I don’t get anything out of it, but I’m glad I helped someone achieve something this important.
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The Sicilian will probably be better than the thin pizza, but be sure you read what I wrote carefully, because it’s easy to screw up.
January 27th, 2010 at 1:24 AM
Well, I’m not going to try your recipe after all. Only because wheat makes me sick, puffy, in pain and grumpy. Apparently I am an obligate carnivore. I would eat it. I just know I would, so I can’t even make it for anyone else. Not yet anyhow.
I do make a swell tomatoe sauce that I put on boring meats and veg. though. Its good too.
January 27th, 2010 at 1:14 PM
After many years off, I’m back to trying to master the art of pizza. I have made too many mom pizzas to count. Have been following Steve’s instructions. All the tips have really helped. The pizza stone makes a huge difference. I have not yet been able to get the pie off the screen with the 500 degree oven blazing in my face–it sticks–so I just leave it on the whole time, with pleasing results. The Costco mozzarella is fantastic. I used a different crust recipe Sunday, one that had less water, which I liked. Putting pepper in is a great idea.
I find it easier to mix the dough in the bowl and knead it on the counter the way I’ve done yeasted doughs since childhood. It takes less net effort, I believe, than washing my Cuisinart, which I must do by hand. Plus, I love kneading dough. I didn’t feel like paying the shipping on Stanislaus sauce so I’ve been buying canned San Marzanos and pressing them through a screen with a potato masher to get the water out. I don’t cook them at all, but mix in some oregano and red pepper flakes. It is delicious on pizza.
I’m pretty sure I am not actually smarter than Steve but I’m always tinkering with my cooking techniques, seeing how they can be improved. His meditations on pizza have been wonderfully inspiring and my boyfriend is very happy to reap the results in the form of homemade, low-cost pizza.
January 27th, 2010 at 8:19 PM
Never wash your screen, unless you have to. It makes the dough stick. Also, spread the sauce with your fingers instead of a ladle. You’ll put less pressure on the dough, and it won’t mash into the screen. Mike says he refrigerates his dough briefly while he’s preparing the pizza for baking, because it makes it easier to work with. I don’t do that, but it might help you.
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A thin aluminum peel is best for lifting a pizza off a screen during the bake. It works best if you get the peel about halfway under the pizza, lift the peel, grab the screen, and pull the screen while holding the peel in place. Hopefully, the pie will slide off as the screen retreats. This works better than trying to jam the peel all the way under the pie, which is more likely to tear the crust. I don’t know why.
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You don’t really need a screen. You can spread semolina or corn meal or Cream of Wheat on the peel, make the pie on it, and slide the pie off onto the stone. The coarse stuff acts like ball bearings. Once in a while, you may accidentally fold a pie in two, which is bad.
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Life without a dishwasher is pretty hard. I can see why you would knead by hand.
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I bought some faux “San Marzanos” (Stanislaus claims the real ones are virtually nonexistent), and I’m going to give them a try, but I’m pretty sure I did that in the past, and they didn’t do it for me. Of course, when I formulated my recipe, I had a very specific idea of what sauce should taste like, and Stanislaus was probably used in the pizzerias where I developed my preference.