Costco Gets Even Better

I can’t believe it. I won’t believe it. It’s too good to be true. If I believe it, it will turn out to be a hoax, and then I’ll be crushed.

A news story says PRIME BEEF IS SHOWING UP AT COSTCO.

No. It’s a cruel joke.

I am absolutely crazy about prime beef. This is one reason I love rib eyes so much. A choice rib eye is nearly as good as the prime version of some other cuts. I don’t buy a lot of prime beef, because it’s so expensive. Once in a while, I’ll get a prime rib roast, age it, cut it into steaks, and freeze them. But I haven’t done it in a while. Even I feel strange, paying over $150 for one roast.

I still laugh about the “green bag” the store gave me the last time I bought a prime roast. It’s really stupid. The greenies, in their hysteria, are moaning about a nonexistent landfill crisis caused by grocery bags, so the store decided to reward people for big buys by giving them reusable cloth bags. I paid $162.50 for a huge hunk of corn-fed prime beef, so I qualified for a ridiculous hippie green bag! I love it.

Now maybe I can get a jump on the prime beef game. According to the Wall Street Journal, the economy is hurting steakhouses, so the beef they usually buy is going to grocery stores, and the prices are low.

Did I just wake up in a dream? Don’t pinch me.

I don’t understand why prime beef has always been so hard to find in some areas. Mike lives near DC, and you would think there would be an awful lot of spoiled, narcissistic people up there who would be willing to buy prime beef which they are unable to appreciate. But he has a hard time getting it. Maybe the people who eat prime are generally willing to go to restaurants to get it.

Big mistake, if true. My steak dinners blow the steakhouses away, and yours can, too. You have to be nuts to waste money on Ruth’s Chris or Peter Luger’s when you can eat better food at home, cheaper.

I guess I was noticing a fortunate trend when I saw prime rib selling at the local store for $12 per pound last week. That’s not bad at all. It means I can get five mindblowing 2″ rib eyes for $120. If they have prime at Costco, I can do even better, although they’ll probably cut out the bone.

To me, the ideal dinner is a rib eye, a big baked potato with sour cream and butter, homebrew, and a killer dessert, like homemade blueberry cheesecake or a big apple pie. That is as good as food gets. I would guess that the ingredients for an entire cheesecake run about $10, if you downsize my recipe to make it more practical. Add $48 for the steak and maybe five bucks for the potato, and you have a dinner that will kill two people, for around $65. Why would you go to a restaurant and pay more for inferior food?

Costco charges about $5.50 for choice rib eyes. Some dude in the story I linked to says they charged him $9 for prime steaks. And Costco rib eyes are always boneless, so while I prefer bone-in, the price is even better than it looks. I would almost buy another freezer to nail that deal down.

I was thinking of filling my second beer cooler with frozen food, to make Obamanomics less frightening. I guess I should do it.

I shouldn’t be glad. People are suffering. That’s why the cheap food is turning up. In a year or so we’ll probably see many, many things dropping significantly in price. Businesses that benefit from high markups in good times have to slash their margins to survive in recessions. Prices will fall, but many people will still be unable to buy. I’m assuming Obama’s efforts to devalue our money will turn out to be weaker than downward pressure on prices.

I got a crazy deal on my milling machine. It would have been a deal at full price, but they reduced the price AND threw in a variable-speed head. I suppose they were thrilled to make a sale.

Man, I hate being on a diet. I get 1800 calories on a typical day, so I can’t fit a real meal into my schedule, even if I only eat once a day. You can get 3000 calories in a high-fat feast without really stuffing yourself. A rib eye is probably over 1500. My only decent meals come on Saturdays, when I drop the restrictions. So I only get to cook good food a couple of times a week. And this is how I plan to live from now on. Maybe I can get some relief if I make smaller portions of good food.

I guess if I can get boneless Costco prime rib eyes, I can cut them thin enough to make them fit into a normal day. When I get bone-in rib eyes, I can’t cut them any thinner than 2″, because that’s the distance between ribs.

It’s rough, writing about this on a day when I had oatmeal for breakfast.

Costco mission this week.