I Love a Nice Hypodermic in the Gums

Today I go back to the dentist. What a lucky, lucky man I am. He is going to pry out one of my Nixon-era fillings and replace it with something which, hopefully, contains a little less mercury and arsenic and plutonium. I can’t complain. Thirty-plus years on a filling is a good long run. And the mercury vapor has been most enjoyable.

After that, I suspect I will be shopping with my sister. My dad’s birthday is practically on Christmas Day, so every year, I have to come up with two bang-up gifts at once, and this year, it has been hard. I came up with one idea: pricey German waterproof panniers for his bike. But it looks like he may be getting clothes to make up the deficit.

In the past, buying for him was not hard. Cigars and expensive liquor. But I feel a little funny buying booze for him these days, and cigars, while appreciated, are in a moral grey area for me.

I also have to come up with his gift for my sister. I sort of wonder if he has ever bought a gift in his life. He always asks someone else to do it. Actually, that’s not totally correct. When we were small, and he went on business trips, he always brought each of us a gift when he came back. We got so we felt entitled to that stuff. That was a long time ago. Things have certainly changed. It has probably been three years since my sister has been involved in our Christmas.

I can write about his Christmas and birthday gifts all day without worrying that I’m spoiling the surprise. I am positive he couldn’t tell me the name of my blog if I asked.

I can’t help being full of hope these days. There has been a miraculous transformation in my relationship with my sister. It wasn’t just a matter of being touchy-feely and having a California-style group hug and making a decision to try to get along. It didn’t come from Oprah or Dr. Phil. It came from God, as an answer to prayer. It was impossible–not hard, but impossible–for us to get along in the past. You would have to have seen it to understand. You may not believe it, but I have always been an easy person to get along with, and I just could not make it work, and I eventually gave up, except for prayer. We got along so badly, family members didn’t want to be around us. Sometimes they visited Miami and didn’t tell my sister.

Fast-forward to today, when I look forward to hearing from her, and I enjoy spending time with her. We sit in church together. We talk about how God is repairing the family. We exchange thoughts on religion. We do things for each other.

It’s so strange, how different things are when you make peace with a person. Before you make peace, that person is a source of misery. They drain your strength. They fill you with dread. You wish they would disappear from your life. If you lack maturity and character, you may seek to harm them. After the change, that person becomes a source of strength. An asset. Someone you value. It’s like turning rat poison into penicillin.

I’ve reconciled with people before, but never with someone for whom I had so little hope. It gives me faith that there is almost no one I can’t make peace with.

I suppose shlepping around a mall while my sister looks at Christmas ornaments and overpriced dog toys is a small price to pay.