Stop Touching That!

The crown prince keeps making advances faster than we expect. Every new step brings a mixture of joy and pain. We want him to develop and grow to be a man, but I am going to miss this baby a great deal. Once he’s gone, he is gone for good.

Today I awakened, rolled over, and saw a big toothless smile about 6 inches in front of me. My son was as happy as a groupie watching Mick Jagger step out of a limo. And he was lying on his side!

My wife was reluctant to push him to roll over and lie on his stomach, so he has not been quick to develop in this area. He did not learn to roll quickly. She finally admitted her mistake and relented. He yelled and thrashed a lot, but he eventually decided to man up and learn.

This morning, he outdid himself. He lay on his back between us, and when he wanted attention from one of us, he would roll in the appropriate direction. He kept going back and forth. It was a great thing to see.

His mom says he plays with her now. He pokes and grabs her and waits to see her reaction, as if she were the baby.

We just got him a sippy cup, and he sometimes takes a little water. He has started choosing what he wants. Sometimes he insists on feeding from his mother. Sometimes he wants milk or formula from a bottle. Now he is also trying to get water. He seems to demand solid food instead of liquid from time to time.

He pushes things away when he doesn’t want them.

We have to watch him around baby wipes. Our practice has been to drop one over his crotch during diaper changes to block surprise attacks, but now he likes to grab them and chew on them to get the liquid out. He can also tear them. My wife found a piece of one in his mouth a day or two back. I hope that was the only piece he managed to cram in there, because it was all we found.

He looks like an adult sometimes. He gets quiet and looks very serious while he does things, as if he is thinking hard. He seems oddly mature until it passes and he starts screaming over nothing.

Last night, he only woke up once. His mother was very pleased. She now has hopes she will be able to sleep so her memory starts working again. I am tired of closing the refrigerator door for her.

I am cautious about making biased-parent predictions, but I think he is going to be very, very smart. These days, medical science and other fields related to childrearing are shaped largely by political concerns, not evidence, so it is fashionable to say kids who develop early aren’t necessarily smart. You’re also not supposed to say a baby’s intelligence is related to the size of his head. But if you dig into the subject, you learn that babies who develop quickly are likely to be smarter as adults, and there is a relationship between head size and intelligence. My son keeps passing milestones fast, and he has an enormous melon on him.

He seems to have high social intelligence. That’s good. Nobody wants a math nerd who repels women, moves to a cabin, and mails people bombs.

When I was a baby, my mother was in a drugstore in Tampa, and I was with her. An old Jewish man looked at me and said, “He’s going to be brilliant. He has a big head.” I love that story. A blessing combined with a staggering lack of tact. Maybe he was just trying to make her feel good about my appearance.

My son inherited a big head, and I hope the God of the Jews will put something good in it.