Home Furnishings for the Aesthetically Flexible

Forgive me readers, for I have neglected you. It has been one week since my last blog post.

Things here are going well. Having a friend living in the house with me has been a blessing. It motivates me to do things people have stopped doing during the pandemic, such as showering and getting dressed before noon. I have also resumed looking after practical obligations around the house. I changed my A/C filters, changed the oil in my car, fixed the batteries in my truck and garden tractor, and attended to some other things I had been ignoring.

I have procrastinated because I keep feeling like nothing people do now matters, apart from drawing close to God. I believe the apocalypse is here, so the main thing people need to be concerned about is qualifying for the rapture. Short of dying and going to hell, it is hard to think of any fate worse than missing the rapture. The plagues of the tribulation will be a lot like the plagues of Egypt, but they will cover the entire world, and the only way to escape will be to out yourself as a Christian and be executed.

Most people don’t know what “apocalypse” means. It means “revelation,” which is why the Revelation is so named. It doesn’t mean “disaster” or “doomsday.” It’s probably inaccurate to refer to the hard years at the conclusion of the end time as the apocalypse, even though I do it. The word “revelation” seems to refer to the revelation John received; God revealed what would happen in the future. We have gotten used to calling the end of the age the apocalypse, though, and we use the word more generally to mean any extremely difficult period that would end the world or at least the current age.

Do you know what this means? It means the apocalypse is over! It already happened. About 1900 years ago, on Patmos. What great news!

Maybe I shouldn’t joke. People are going to beg for death.

I have put lots of things off. Maybe it matters, or maybe I’ll be removed from the earth before there are any consequences. In any case, it’s nice to get up and get things done.

I was delivered from a spirit of laziness years ago, but it returned, and I have learned I have to keep casting it out. When it’s gone, I get all sorts of things done. I’m like a slingshot someone has just released. I feel I’m fighting it successfully this week.

I’m getting rid of my awful living room chairs. I have a cheap lift recliner I got for my dad, and I used it when I’m watching Youtube with Marvin. It’s the best chair in the living room. The other two are horribly uncomfortable armchairs with Queen Anne legs. I knew Mike was not happy in them, and he would be here a while, so I said he ought to get a recliner of his own. He could take it with him when he got his own place. We went and picked up a Craigslist beauty, and now I can get rid of the armchairs. I’m not changing anything else until Rhodah gets here, because she will want a say in decorating.

She’s not hard to get along with. I told her we had to choose between comfort and elegance, and she picked comfort instantly. She is actually interested in setting the living room up with twin recliners. Most women hate recliners and would threaten divorce to get rid of them.

Why do women hate so many fantastic things? Recliners, suspenders, overalls, deer mounts…

My mother didn’t like convertibles. Unbelievable. She said we would roll over in a canal and die. Convertibles are among life’s great joys.

Mike thinks he can sell the recliners on Craigslist. I wish him luck, because I tried. I see us hauling them to the Salvation Army with one month.

The armchairs are torture devices, and they’re ancient. My late aunt had them in her house, and when she died, for some unfathomable reason, my mother took them and moved them from Kentucky to Florida. They’re like a curse that follows the family.

The main reason I’m blogging today is to share testimony, not to ramble about chores and chairs.

Yesterday, Rhodah had a vision. She was in bed in the morning, awake, and suddenly, she saw two angels beside her bed, hosing it with fire. The bed was covered with some kind of elegant comforter or something. It was white. She was wearing some sort of beautiful white gown. She said the vision showed her how God was looking after her.

It’s funny that the angels used fire. Rhodah says, “FIRE!”, all the time. It means she’s calling down fire on things. She uses it seriously, for things like coronavirus. If I said I thought I were getting coronavirus, she would say, “FIRE to coronavirus!” She also says it when she doesn’t mean it, though. “FIRE to getting to the airport late!” “FIRE to sitting in the middle seat!”

It’s wonderful to have occasional signs and wonders. When I say that, people with little pinchy faces like to say, “We are not supposed to follow signs and wonders!” Welllll…the Bible says signs and wonders will follow US. See Matthew 16. Put that in your pipe and smoke it a while. If you’re not getting any signs or wonders, something is wrong. Shouldn’t you be looking into it?

Today my friend Leah asked if we needed prayer for anything. She didn’t know about Rhodah’s vision. Rhodah and I visited Ireland last month, and her luggage is still in France. We are getting no help from Air France, Aer Lingus, or South African Airlink, even though they are all responsible. I asked Leah to pray. She said she would ask God to send two angels to protect and return it.

Mike has some health problems, and they make life very unpleasant sometimes. Yesterday, I got him to let Rhodah and me pray for him on WhatsApp. I got him to say he forgave everyone who had sinned against him, and I got him to say he believed he would be healed. We told the disorders to leave him, and we commanded his body to be healed. He felt strange pulsing waves going through his back and arms. Today some of his symptoms are gone. We are going to continue.

In the morning, before we prayed, he told me he had been praying on his own about his blood sugar, and afterward, he had checked it. The value was lower than ever. He was extremely excited.

I have been asking God to make my home a house of prayer, and he is doing it. What a relief.

This is all I have right now. Hope people find it helpful.