One More Appalling Threshold

I’m still not over gay Superman.

Ever since I heard about DC’s new Superman’s status as the sort of superhero who lets other men use his tortured orifices for sexual pleasure, I have been texting people, groaning aloud, and complaining to Marvin. How can you respect a superhero who has to have another man get off his back before saving you?

In remarkably timely related news, it looks like archaologists have found Sodom. I don’t mean Christian archaeologists with high school educations. I mean secular archaeologists who rely on traditional scientific methods.

In southern Jordan, to the northeast of the Dead Sea, there is a tel. A tel is a mound where a settlement used to be. The tel is named Tall el Hammam. Scientists have been working it over for a long time. They now say they believe it was bigger and more important than Jerusalem in its time, and they believe it was blown apart and melted in around 1650 BC, putting it in the temporal ballpark with the destruction of Sodom.

Their theory is that a meteor exploded above it, because the city got so hot, there is no other natural explanation. Clay and stone melted. The people of the Bronze Age couldn’t create that kind of heat.

I don’t know why the Bronze Age was called the Bronze Age, when steel was already being produced, but then I am to historians what Joy Behar is to political scientists.

Meteors are interesting because go off like bombs even though they’re made of things that aren’t explosive. They move really fast, and that causes them to blow up. Meteor craters are usually round, even though meteors don’t usually hit the earth head-on. They’re round because they blow up when they hit the earth. Their kinetic energy is so great, when they hit the earth, the energy suddenly turns into immense heat, so a lump of iron and nickel can go off like a cherry bomb.

Nearly all meteors burn up or explode in flight. Friction with the air can heat a meteor until it explodes. It is believed that the famous Tunguska blast of 1908 was caused by a big meteor that exploded before it could hit the ground in Siberia. It blew up with more energy than all but the biggest fission bombs, and it looks like whatever flattened Sodom was even bigger.

The scientists found debris over a wide area, including severed limbs without bodies. They think whatever hit Sodom destroyed some things with heat and others with explosive forces.

Is Tall el Hammam Sodom? The flippant answer to that question is, “No, it’s one of the dozens of other huge cities by the Dead Sea that were blown up and melted in the 17th century BC.” I think it’s Sodom. If not, where is Sodom, and why isn’t Tall el Hammam mentioned in the Bible? I’m going to go with it.

Gays like to say Sodom was only destroyed because the Sodomites were selfish. They like to say that when they’re not saying the Bible is nonsense, I mean. The truth is that homosexuality was a huge factor. Sodom was also destroyed because of greed, cruelty, and selfishness, but the final straw was the attempted rape of the angels by a gang of men, and later in the Bible, the term “sodomite” is used to mean “homosexual,” not “greedy, selfish, cruel person.” The Hebrews became greedy and selfish, but God never called them sodomites because of it. He called homosexuality an abomination. He never said that about greed or selfishness.

Did a meteor hit Sodom? I doubt it. I think it was just God’s power, perhaps wielded through angels. God doesn’t need meteors to get things done. He still does miracles, and they don’t involve obvious natural means. An event which has a natural cause is not a miracle. By definition, an miracle has to defy nature.

Joe Biden has turned America’s troops and diplomats into a legion of homosexuality conquistadors, we’re putting rainbow flags up in countries where same-sex romance is about as welcome as Ebola, Superman’s bodily openings are being used like a girl’s, and suddenly, the location of Sodom has been revealed, confirming the account in Genesis.

It must all be coincidence.

California just passed a law preventing toy stores from having separate aisles dedicated to boys and girls, and it’s also illegal to use pink and blue to distinguish the sexes. Did I fail to mention that? I should have thrown that in.

Over 10% of Americans have the misfortune to live in California, so when California passes a sick law involving products or retailing, companies that have to comply with it are likely to force California’s standards on the rest of us to reduce costs. I wonder if toy stores in relatively healthy states are going to start obeying California’s gendrification law.

It’s horrifying to think that flakes elected by Californians can rule over the rest of us, but it’s true, just as it’s true that extremist Muslim leaders changed the security rules for airline passengers the world over.

I can’t wait to see what happens next. The blessed get more and more blessed, which is wonderful to see, and the cursed get more and more cursed, which is, sadly, interesting because of morbid curiosity. The rapture will be the culmination of a centrifuging process. Nobody will remain where they are. Everyone will ascend or descend.

I can’t relax. I guess I will be wound up for the rest of the evening.