Speaking my Mime

This morning Usurvivable Killer Hurricane Eta passed over my house. When I woke up after an uneventful and restful sleep, I looked out the window and noticed that it was completely still. Then I checked the Internet to find out if I had the date wrong. No, I was right under Eta. Probably in the north eyewall.

Have I been watching the news, like a responsible person? Of course not. People who watch the weather news are not responsible. They are just gullible.

They were telling us 73-mph gusts were on the way. Did they actually believe it, or were they just trying to sell more diapers and SUV’s? It’s impossible to know. When people lie to you over and over, you can’t evaluate anything they say without corroboration from credible sources. It’s like listening to Joe Biden talk about fracking. Or, well, anything else.

Remember how the Weather Channel got caught faking the intensity of the wind? A reporter was leaning into the wind like he was trapped behind a jet engine, and people entered the frame, walking normally. Guess what? They’re still doing it.

I think the worst thing about their antics is that they don’t credit the master. They never mention the man who taught them everything they know. It’s criminal. I won’t stand for it.

Here, then, is the granddaddy of all Weather Channel hurricane reporters. Enjoy.