I Have Been Too Hard on Myself

I got a few comments yesterday that were so favorable, they were somewhat embarrassing. Of course, I am grateful. I’m not complaining.

One of the dangers of addressing an audience is that people may begin to think too highly of you. So you can start out with good intentions and end up moonwalking on top of an SUV outside a courthouse, because you have become convinced you can do no wrong. I sincerely espouse solid Christian morals and principles of good character, but that doesn’t mean I do a good job of living up to them.

Since I started trying to write for a living, I have become concerned that I would eventually become something of a public figure, and that people might treat me with more regard than I am due. It’s a funny thing; if you have even a little fame, people you don’t even know will start trying to give you things and do things for you, and some will treat you as though you are more than human. I can’t help being concerned about that. I think glory is like wealth. A certain amount is okay, but if you get too much, you face the risk that it will corrupt you. I have always wished I could write books that were famous, without becoming famous, personally. I know that’s not realistic; it’s a hard trick to pull off. Especially when you have to do interviews in order to get where you want to be.

Some people desire fame. I think it’s one of the worst things that can happen to you. If I could sign a contract right now that assured that I would make a good living from writing, but that only my friends and family and professional contacts would know who I was, I’d do it in a heartbeat.

I sometimes think one of the reasons lower beings are supposed to glorify God is that the alternative is to accept the glory for themselves and become poisoned by it. There are some things you are supposed to hand over to God. Vengeance, for example. A portion of your time. A portion of your income. I believe we’re supposed to be like oxen that tread out corn. We’re allowed to take a reasonable amount of what we produce–we’re not muzzled–but we’re not supposed to keep everything.

If things go well, I will try not to allow my head to be turned.

In other news, Baldilocks has bought a domain for the site she intends to put up to get PR for her efforts to fund the Kenyan school Barack Obama abandoned. But she needs a web designer. Someone give her a hand.