New Prayer Partner: my Dad

I spent time with my dad today at the ALF. He was very worried. He said he was unhappy. He asked me if I had any sisters.

It was a very good visit.

Doesn’t sound like a good visit, does it? It was, though. Several good things happened. I got to spend time with someone who is likely to forget he knows me pretty soon. I got to pray with my dad, the former atheist, and I was able to talk to him about developing a relationship with God. Those things are worth a lot.

The problems would be there no matter what, but we could have ended up with a situation in which he hadn’t asked for salvation and refused to pray. Because we did not, I am grateful.

I think I understand why he keeps paying me compliments and telling me how important I am to him. I’m the only person he knows. He interacts with the ALF staff, but he can’t get to know them. He has forgotten my sister. My mother is dead. He has no friends left to come see him. One of his sisters is dead, his other sister has dementia, and none of his relatives are going to drop by. That leaves me. I can see why he has become more attached to me.

I’m not saying he never loved me or that selfishness is the only reason he craves my company now, but when you only know one person, that person will necessarily be important to you.

He finally knows he has dementia. He should have realized it a long time ago. Maybe a spirit helped him stay in denial. He wants to know certain things, in order to feel secure, but he knows that if I tell him, he won’t remember them after I’m gone. It drives him crazy.

He says that when I’m gone, he doesn’t know whether I’m ever coming back. He knows he can’t remember where I live. He knows he can’t recall my phone number. I said I would put some facts on a sheet of paper, have it laminated, and bring it to him. He can keep it by the bed. Maybe it will make him feel more secure. We have written things down already, but he misplaces the papers.

I told him he needed to start talking to God. Only God is available 24 hours a day. I told him God knew who he was, that he cared about him, and that he would help. I told him God was just waiting to hear from him.

When we prayed, I asked God to visit him and help him to be free from worry. I don’t recall my exact words, but I’m sure I prayed for God to help him to be close to him and to pray often. My dad agreed in prayer, and he was serious.

His problem is that he gave in to God after he became demented. He was not in the habit of praying, and now he can’t form that habit unless God gives him supernatural help.

For some reason, security is a huge issue for him. He has the idea that if we don’t live together, something could happen to me, and then he would have no one to look after him and see that he gets care. I had to tell him our living together wouldn’t protect me from things like that.

When I was a little boy, sometimes I thought about the possibility that my mother would die, and I couldn’t stand it. It seemed to me that the world would end if she were gone. Maybe that’s how my dad feels about me.

We talked in circles for a long time. “Why can’t we stay together?” “Taking care of you is too much work for one person.” “I can look after myself.” “I wish you could, but you’re not able.” “Try me.” “We tried it for several years, and it got so hard we had to give up.” “There has to be a solution.” “This is best solution I could come up with.” When we got far enough from the original question, he would go back to it, and we would start over.

I lost count of the number of times he asked me where he lived.

We got to pray together. I got to have another session with the man who raised me, before he forgets me. I have hope that we’ll be together forever. These are the things that matter. They’re why I’ll look forward to seeing him from now on.

God told me my dad would be saved. He has been telling me for years. Sometimes I doubted. Now he has pulled it off. That’s our God for you. Never say a word against him. He cares about every one of us, and he is completely faithful. I wish I could say he had told me every person I had prayed about would be saved. I can’t. I’m very glad he got through to this one, however.