Trespassers Will be Fried
May 12th, 2018Tree Rat Feast
I had to fry squirrels again today. I had 5 in the fridge, and they were taking up a lot of room. I had them soaking in water mixed with salt and baking soda. The soda was there to kill any gaminess. It works.
The first time I fried squirrels, I had problems. I used shallow oil in a big pan, and it was not that easy to get the meat to brown correctly because some bits liked to stick up out of the oil. Today I did what I should always do. I used deeper oil. I put maybe 1-1/4″ of cheap olive oil in a saucepan. This allowed me to submerge the meat.
I cut the squirrels up differently. I divided them into arms, legs, and torsos. I kept the ribs on the torsos. There isn’t a lot of meat on a squirrel ribcage, but there is enough to make it worth keeping.
I didn’t soak the meat in buttermilk. I didn’t have enough. I drained the brine off with a colander, and then I tossed the meat in a small amount of buttermilk and drained it again.
I used the following seasonings: salt, pepper, paprika, chipotle powder, and garlic powder. The ratio was about a tablespoon of each per cup of flour, except for the garlic and pepper. I guess I used half a teaspoon of each per cup of flour.
I put 3 cups of biscuit flour (no leavening) in a bag with the seasonings, and I shook it like crazy to mix it all up. As I was cooking, I would throw one batch of squirrel parts in the bag, shake it to coat them, and extract them with tongs. It worked well but made a mess.
I added a tablespoon or so of bacon grease to the olive oil, and I used cheap olive oil with virtually no flavor. I would never fry anything in extra virgin oil or any oil that tasted like olives. It’s the wrong oil for high heat.
I used a thermometer and tried to keep the frying temperature around 350 degrees. This is important because if frying oil gets too cold, breading falls off.
I made buttermilk biscuits. The shortening was half butter and half bacon grease. I added a little cream to the buttermilk, and I put a teaspoon or two of sugar in the flour just for kicks.
After the last batch of squirrel came out, I used some of the oil (plus more bacon grease) to make gravy. I used the seasoned flour from the squirrels. I also added sage, more salt, and more pepper.
How did it come out? It was fantastic. The meat was cooked pretty evenly. The breading stayed on. The seasonings were right on target. The biscuits were perfect. The gravy was exceptional. I poured the gravy on the squirrel pieces as I was eating them. I had gravy all over me, but it was worth it.
The only complaint I have is that not all squirrels are tender. Some cook up like rubber bands. You can still eat them, but you have to work at it.
I can’t tell a tender squirrel from a tough one until I cook it. I don’t know what to do. My plan is to continue eating the tough ones along with the tender ones until I have a solution.
The brining is a great move. The squirrels had no gamy flavor at all. They were better than dark chicken meat. The taste is a little richer, with nutty overtones. Makes sense, considering what they eat.
The sight of squirrels doesn’t bother me the way it did between the end of the season and the day I found out I was allowed to shoot nuisance squirrels. After the season, they paraded around in front of me every time I left the house, as if they were trying to make a point. They ate my blueberries off my only producing bush. I was powerless. Then I got cleared to take them down, and that’s what I did. I took them down to Chinatown. Now I see them as opportunities for hunting practice as well as cheap meat.
I don’t think I’ll work too hard to exploit them for meat, however. They’re a pain to clean, they stink, and cooking them is a lot of work. I will try to train myself to throw their dead bodies out into the woods.
I gave Maynard and Marvin some squirrel arms. I thought they would enjoy picking the meat off the bones, and it saved me the aggravation of heating up their regular food.
The new trigger for the Marlin 60 .22 arrived. I’m going to see if I can install it now. It may turn out to be a much better gun than I had hoped.
I learned something disturbing about the Model 60. It’s hard to install a sling. The tube magazine takes up room in the stock, and that means there isn’t much wood to hold a front stud. You need to start with around 1/2″ of wood when you install a stud. I have about 3/8″. I think I solved the problem. I bought a stud with a nut about 1/4″ in height, and I ground it down to a little more than 1/8″. The screw isn’t very thick, and in order for a nut to work, its threaded height only has to equal the width of the screw that goes through it. I should be able to recess the nut into the inside of the stock and still have 1/4″ of wood below it to provide support for it.
I don’t want to ruin this stock by splitting it. The wood is beautiful for the price. Lots of figuring. Can’t figure out this wood found its way into a stock for a $170 rifle.
I need to make a hole inside the stock, wide enough and deep enough to hold the nut for the stud. The nut needs to fit tightly in it so the knurling on the outside of the nut will hold the nut still while I tighten the screw that goes through it. What I need is a counterbored hole. It has to be 1/4″ wide inside the stock, and then it has to decrease to about 0.090″ across for the screw.
I looked at various solutions for this, and I think a 1/4″ Forstner bit is the way to go. This is a wood bit that makes cylindrical holes accurately centered around a chosen point. I can drill the hole for the screw, put the point of the Forstner bit in it, and open the hole up, to a depth of around 5/32″.
They make sling studs for tube magazines. They have little rings that use the magazines for support. I don’t want that. Tube magazines are weak. They’re not made to hold slings, especially if you wrap your sling around your arm to steady your aim. I want a sling, but I’m not willing to bend the magazine in order to get it.
I’m wondering just how accurate a cheap .22 can be. I was hoping for 2 MOA, but maybe it can do better. We will see. Once the stud is installed on the stock, I’ll be able to use the gun with a bipod, and that will allow me to test its accuracy better than I can right now. It would be a hoot to have a .22 that would hunt at 100 yards.
Squirrels, pigs, and rabbits are the only animals I can hope to cook until the hunting seasons open up again. I could try armadillos, but the thought of handling and eating an animal that may be full of leprosy is not appealing. There are recipes for coyote, but I’m not Korean. I’ve read that bobcats taste surprisingly good. Could I enjoy eating a cat, even if it tasted good? It would be hard to get used to.
My grandmother ate possums. I just can’t. Maybe some day I’ll work up to it.
In the fall, deer season will start. I like venison. I’m not crazy about it, but it’s pretty good.
If I get the new .22 trigger to work, I’ll blog it. I look forward to having a trigger I can pull without wondering if I’m about to break it.
May 12th, 2018 at 11:08 PM
Man, cheap olive oil is not really olive oil. That industry is so corrupt and shady. Most of that stuff is terrible seed oils with just a touch of olive flavor. Euro mafia buys oil in bulk, mixes it and repackages it fraudulently.
IMO, you are better off springing the $ for a big bottle of avocado oil from costco, keep it under 375 degrees, and filter/reuse it. I think it might be heat-stable to 400+ degrees or so.
May 12th, 2018 at 11:37 PM
What I used was the cheapest Berio oil. They got sued for using olives that weren’t Italian, but they were olives.
May 13th, 2018 at 9:18 AM
Berio? Really? Hmmm, I’ll have to look into that. I’ve been buying the California Olive Ranch stuff, but it’s all finishing oil, really. None of it is light or flavorless or good for frying. And it’s $$.
May 13th, 2018 at 10:20 AM
I used olive oil because it was what I had, not because I think highly of it. The news about the olive oil scandals is interesting.
May 13th, 2018 at 10:42 AM
Get a cast iron chicken fryer. My grandfather said to catch the possum and keep it in a cage (or under the front porch in his case) and feed it what you want it to taste like. Nuts, apples, etc.