Type 1 Diabetic Runs Marathons

Meant to tell you about this yesterday. Reader Ruth H. has a granddaughter named Jordan Hoese, and she is believed to be the youngest diabetic marathon runner in the US. And she has been on the news! You can see a video at that link.

I think I could do a marathon. On a bike. If it were all downhill.

No, I know my limitations.

I especially like the idea of taking carbohydrates with you when you run. But I find that the wind keeps blowing the pizza box open.

Congratulations, Jordan!

Plus Jon Voight, Bringing the Smackdown

Am I the only one who is loving Jon Voight’s in-your-face Washington Times op-ed? Kind of reminds me of Reagan. Lots of common sense, and low in BS.

Thank God, it’s coming from one of Hollywood’s finest actors. Ordinarily, as soon as something like this comes out, the liberal damage control squad pops up and says it’s a failed actor trying to get attention. But Voight is one of the most charismatic and effective actors of his generation. Even in movies like Anaconda, you can’t take your eyes off of him. Everything he says drips with significance.

I realize, he’ll never be half the thespian Rosie O’Donnell is. But enough fat jokes.

I keep thinking about Obama, bailing out on his own family in Kenya. He was going to help his family’s village build a school, and they have been waiting two years, and he hasn’t done a thing. Imagine how painful that must be to the people he let down. Imagine the hope he put in their hearts and then allowed to wither.

Here’s a question. If this is how he keeps promises to his own relatives and their friends, how well will he keep his promises to us?

Now look at John McCain. A man who adopts other people’s children and refuses to make hay of it. Hey, I know the answer. Let’s have John McCain adopt Obama’s village.

Another possible solution: tax the bejeezus out of the village. That way, they’ll have tons of revenue to spend on schools. That’s how taxes work, isn’t it? In Obamaworld, I mean. Maybe we can get a teacher’s union in there while we’re at it, to make sure no one is working too hard and that the place doesn’t become infected with insane ideas like meritocracy.

Maybe we could auction a pair of Obama’s boxers on Ebay. If we can start a bidding war between Chris Matthews and Frank Rich, we’ll be able to buy the village a school plus its own aircraft carrier.

Shun This Site

Drudgebart links to a story that says Cuil.com (pronounced “Cool”) is poised to crush its main competitor in the search engine biz, Google.

Here is why I hope that is not true:

“We didn’t find any results for ‘”eat what you want and die like a man’”

Aren’t Politicians Great?

Baldilocks has a project.

If you don’t know Baldi, let me introduce you. She’s an American. Her dad is a Kenyan immigrant. She belongs to the same tribe as Barack Obama.

In 2006, Obama visited Kenya, and he spoke at a school there, in the village where his father was born. He promised to provide assistance for the school. But he didn’t come through. He hasn’t done anything. Funny thing is, a good number of the kids that would have been helped are Obama’s relatives.

Baldi would like to publicize the situation and get some money headed in the direction of the school. She says there is also an orphanage involved. I had some ideas, which she and I will be talking about today, but for now, why not run over to her blog and read about the story? Here is the link.

I don’t know if it will be possible to help these kids effectively without the effort looking like a cheap political attack, but Senator Obama could always put an end to the matter by making a call or two, so it seems to me that if the affair reflects badly on him, it’s his own fault.

At Last we Meet

I spent 4 months on a kibbutz back in the Eighties. While I was there, I became good friends with a cop from New Zealand. He told me about Fred Dagg, a character created by Kiwi comedian John Clarke. A dagg is a clod of manure in a sheep’s wool. Fred is a sheep farmer with lots of strong but uninformed opinions.

When I got home from abroad, my friend sent me a videotape full of Fred Dagg’s antics. But I was never able to play it, because it was recorded on an NTSC VCR. Or because it was recorded on a PAL VCR. The one we don’t have here, whatever that is. I never got to see Fred Dagg.

Recently, I did a radio interview to promote my book, and today I got an email from the hosts, linking to this Youtube video. If you look in the comments below the screen, you can see someone pointing out that the bald guy in the video is Fred Dagg! Actually, it’s John Clarke, doing a different role, but you can find Dagg videos on Youtube. Naturally, I had to search for more them. If I can find a DVD, I’m going to buy it.

What a wild coincidence.

You might enjoy this bit of Clarke’s work, taken from a movie which no one saw because it was filmed in New Zealand. If you want to watch Dagg videos, it’s important to remember that most men in New Zealand are named Trevor.

Here is Clarke AS Dagg:

Shake the Dust Off Your Shoes, Dan

While Barack Obama was defiling the Temple Mount with his campaign posters and his ridiculous heathen idol, a true friend of Israel was saying goodbye. Read Rabbi Yechiel Eckstein’s tribute to departing Israeli ambassador Dan Gillerman, who is finishing up his tour of the festering, anti-Semitic, socialist, snakepit known as the UN.

Creepy

Received this from a reader. Not sure what it’s all about. Reminds me of Tony Shalhoub in Men in Black, right after Tommy Lee Jones shot his head off.

If this is racist, please let me know.

Oh, wait. It’s about Obama. It HAS to be racist.

More

Bad Chris! Bad!

Unlikely

Today I read the Drudgebart-linked story about how former astronaut Edgar Mitchell says aliens have visited earth, and that various governments know it but have succeeded in covering it up. For some reason which he did not specify.

Okay.

I totally believe that. We can’t keep our defense secrets out of the hands of the Chinese, but a whole slew of incompetent governments can keep aliens under wraps for sixty years. Sure, no problem. After all, hiding the aliens is much more important to our government than little things like preventing the Chinese from sinking our nuclear submarines. Because…

Oh, right. People would panic in the streets, by the tens of millions. The way they just did when Mitchell’s story hit the Internet. Why do UFO kooks always claim the public will spaz out if they find out aliens are here? Think of all the big stories we’ve been exposed to. Stock market crashes. Terrorist attacks. Pearl Harbor. Those things, we manage to deal with. But the thought that somewhere on an Air Force base, a three-foot tall alien might be posing for photos, eating a Snickers bar, ready to give us a cure for cancer…that would send us screaming into the night.

I know there is no reason why aliens can’t exist, and maybe they really do visit earth, but I also happen to have a little thing I call “common sense,” which ruins the whole fantasy. Quantum mechanics is insane, and it keeps telling us things we thought were impossible actually happen. But so far, the best science we have tells us that there is no way to get to earth from the nearest star fast enough to avoid dying en route, or getting so old and senile you forget why you left the house in the first place. By the time aliens got here, they’d be like Henry Fonda in On Golden Pond, getting lost while picking blueberries a hundred feet from his house. They’d say, “We come in peace. And we hope we’re in time for the early bird special.”

“Gort. Klaatu. Geritol. Depends.”

Speaking of diapers, people are saying this guy has to be telling the truth, because he’s a former astronaut…like Lisa Nowak. Let’s be real. He walked on the moon, but he’s not claiming he met any aliens while he was there, and he associates with weirdos, and he runs something called the Institute of Noetic Science. Here is what its homepage says:

Located in Northern California [case closed], IONS is a nonprofit membership organization that conducts and sponsors leading-edge research into the potentials and powers of human consciousness.

Translation: “We like to get stoned and stare at the covers of Yes albums.”

He may be on the level, but my money is on “wacko.” Sadly, when you deal with human beings making claims like this, that’s the safest place for your money to be.

Now watch the aliens kidnap me and give me a punitive probe.

Get me a Job at The New Yorker

People seem to like Barack Urkel, so I thought I’d show you a better version of the art, done by Aaron.

Am I selling T-shirts? No. But I hope Aaron will.

Someone do a Better Version

I don’t understand why no one else is doing this.

The GOP’s Sergeant Pepper

The other day I heard Rush Limbaugh say McCain seemed surprised that his liberal pals in the media were suddenly ignoring him. Rush’s take seemed to amount to “DUH.” Every intelligent conservative commentator saw this coming. My question: how come the voters didn’t notice? I hate to cite Ann Coulter, given her faults, but she was right on the money with this one. And she made an obvious point, i.e., ordinarily you don’t let your enemies choose your candidate.

The same liberal media goofs who are backing the Stalin-worthy “Fairness Doctrine” are now ignoring McCain with open contempt. Three anchors left the country with Obama, reporters don’t bother to show up when McCain’s plane arrives, and McCain can’t get a piece published in the New York Times AFTER they published Obama’s unaltered work.

I don’t watch much TV, but when I do watch, it seems like McCain is invisible. I saw more of him during the primaries. Where are his ads? Where are the interviews? Does he even have a campaign manager? If you’ve seen a lot of his ads, tell me about it in the comments. I can’t remember a single one.

And when is McCain going to pick a running mate? He should have been thinking about this last year; isn’t that obvious? How can it still be a puzzle in late July?

I thought Fred Thompson was a wimp, but McCain is outdoing him. This election should be a walk for the GOP, once people find out what Obama is really all about. But they’re not going to find out if we don’t get moving. It’s as if McCain and the RNC have swallowed the hype surrounding the 143-day messiah, and they’re afraid of going to hell.

Like I always say, you can’t be made manager at KMart after 143 days on the job. How can the same amount of experience qualify you to lead the most powerful nation in the world?

The party, including McCain himself, needs to get more excited about McCain. Sure, he’s not conservative enough. But he’s more conservative than Obama; so was Che Guevara. And even if he leans too far left, he’s not going to pack the federal courts with socialists. At least not the kind Obama would pick. Nobody cares about that. If you walk into a room with ten conservatives and point out that bad judicial appointments are the most damaging things a President can do, 19 of them will be amazed to hear it. What ignorance. Federal judges are like gods. Do you really want to see Hillary Clinton or Robert Reich or Laurence Tribe on the Supreme Court? Imagine three or four Ginsburgs. And let’s not even talk about the appellate and district judges, who have many, many times the power of the Supreme Court.

I think we ended up with McCain for a couple of reasons. First, Fred Thompson is a fool, and he got our hopes up and then proved he was just teasing us to make his wife happy. Second, Republicans are determined to make Democrats love them. We keep mewling about how we can’t get elected if we’re not aiming for the middle (like Ronald Reagan always did), and we forget that voters are attracted to confidence. The American people are more ignorant than ever, and they are not smart enough to make voting decisions based on the issues. But they love a confident candidate with a strong message. And we’re telling them our message is wrong and needs to be watered down. We’re offering them McCain as our liberalized, improved conservative. And of course, they already have a real liberal, so they’re not interested.

Say what you want about George Bush. The man exudes confidence, at least when he speaks. Remember the first Kerry debate? He just showed up and leaned on the podium. As if it had never occurred to him that he could lose. When he talked about North Korea, he said, “I know how the world WORKS.” Like it was painfully obvious that Kerry couldn’t match his understanding of world politics. Wasn’t that the first debate? I believe it was. I think confidence explains why Bush blew that debate, and it also explains why he won in the long run. He appeared to have total faith in what he said.

His deeds, on the other hand, are disappointing. He talks with great assurance, but then he shoots himself in the foot with that “crossing the aisle” nonsense. Has that paid off even once? I guess he’s willing to talk the talk, but he’s not always brave enough to walk the walk. Oh well. At least he’s not John Kerry.

I’m really starting to wonder if we’re going to turn the country over to Barack Urkel the 143-Day Wonder. I thought it was impossible, but if we don’t see some real campaigning, it might just happen.

Edwards Off VP List

I guess it’s stupid to link to a story Matt Drudge has already linked to. But HERE.

My observations:

1. Thank God it wasn’t a man.

2. Nice manly recovery, running into a stairwell and then hiding on a toilet.

3. Gary Hart sends his regards.

I don’t like John Edwards. I always said I thought he was more evil than even Hillary. She’s just a run of the mill hack who has a problem with male authority figures. He’s a creep who spent his life lying to juries in order to make money for himself and make medical care harder for other people to get. He has no principles whatsoever. He has the soul of a tapeworm. I am glad this happened. If we have to get stuck with Barack Obama, we shouldn’t have to put up with the additional burden of knowing this bloodsucking louse is one rifle bullet away from the Oval Office.

With Predetermined Result

Let me get your opinion on something. Who is currently the hottest babe on Fox News?

Of course, we all know the answer. Lauren Green is easily the hottest babe in the solar system. So we won’t count her.

I was watching Domenica Davis today while I ate lunch, and I have to say, Mr. Ailes has outdone himself this time. I have no idea whether she has any brains, but she can talk and point at a map, so as far as I’m concerned, she’s qualified to do her job. Some meteorologists have degrees in things like physics. Domenica’s graduate degree–I’m not making fun–is in broadcast meteorology. Yes, you can go to college and train for the specific task of being a weatherperson. One hazard: if you’re a man, it will turn you gay. At least, that’s what the evidence suggests.

On top of her other accomplishments, she’s a champion figure skater. Check out this video.

Again, Lauren Green is a concert pianist, so we have to disqualify her from competing with mere mortals.

I think it’s kind of cruel to post that video, because it shows that Domenica’s body is as perfect as her face. That will destroy the hopes of a lot of jealous women who comfort themselves with the knowledge that a lot of anchorbabes have big butts.

Fox has a sleeper babe on its hands these days, at least for men in a certain age range. They’ve really shined up Jeanine Pirro. If she had looked this good when she ran against Hillary, maybe things would have turned out differently. She used to dress like a prosecutor, but now we’re getting surprising amounts of cleavage and sleevelessness.

I think Domenica Davis is the hottest product Fox currently offers, if you don’t count Lauren Green. If anything happens to her, the title escheats to Courtney Friel.

Earl Butz, we Need You

The Pope is telling young people to spurn materialism.

I have to ask. Wouldn’t this be more convincing coming from a guy who didn’t live in a palace, wear handmade clothes, fly first class, and get free medical care?

Yeah, yeah. He took an oath of poverty. Give me his deal, and I’ll forego a salary, too. He already has all the things you need a salary to buy.

I thought Al Gore was bad, but at least he hasn’t stuffed his ten-megawatt mansion with Michelangelo sculptures. Yet.

Comments Read

I decided to remove an entry I put up earlier today, but I wanted to thank everyone for the kind responses.