One More Chance, Please God

This is a tough day.

Marvin, my sweet little feathered buddy of 28 years, had some seizures last night. I had to hold him and consider the possibility that he was dying in my hands. Seizures can be caused by things that are reversible, like low calcium levels, but they can also be caused by worse things.

I did what I could for him last night, and he pepped up and started playing with his toys, but in the morning, he was weak, so I took him to the animal hospital at the University of Florida in Gainesville. That is where he is now, having tests and receiving care. I have been praying and commanding the illness to go. I have been speaking blessings over Marvin.

My county is extremely conservative and full of Christians. Gainesville is different. A typical university town, it is a hotbed of white-hot socialism, Trump Derangement Syndrome, DeSantis Derangment Syndrom, imperialist feminism, perversion, wicca, and, presumably, antisemitism.

My wife and I got into the car with Marv, and of course, our son had to go, too. The people at the hospital took a long history and started work quickly. They were very nice to us.

I was highly distraught last night, and I was only a little less upset this morning. Having harm come to one of my pets has always been one of my worst fears. I lost my cockatoo, Maynard, 4 years ago, and it was very, very painful. Now Marv is having problems.

It’s terrible when something you have feared and fought to prevent for decades comes to pass.

I speak blessing over Marvin twice a day, and we include him in our daily prayers. I try not to do anything to open myself or my family to dangerous spirits. I think this is the best a human being can do.

When we left the hospital, my wife asked me if I had noticed something. She saw several women who helped us, including a veterinarian, and every single one had a huge septum ring hanging out of her nose.

She didn’t see the receptionist, who was an older woman. I believe she didn’t have a ring.

Anyway, it was very disturbing to be told that 80% of the women who helped us had these off-putting ornaments. They looked like they belonged to a cult. It really bothered me. I felt like I had just discovered that I was living in a horror movie.

A septum ring is supposed to be a way of expressing your individuality and your contempt for conformity, but in reality, nothing says you’re a conformist like a septum ring.

My son, true to form, blew out in his car seat, so my wife had to use the “family” restroom to clean him up. There was a women’s room and an everything room, but there was no men’s room. I suppose that was a deliberate insult.

My wife was hungry when we left, so we went to a nearby pizza place. It was a dirty little place with good reviews.

We had to stand to order, and then we filled our own drinks and waited for the food. When I got our drinks, I couldn’t find the straws. The lids had weird openings in them, much larger than would be needed for a straw. I realized the obvious, but hoping against hope, I asked where the straws were, and a young black man behind the counter told me they weren’t allowed to put them out where people could see them. He said, “It’s kind of weird.” I nodded and told him I understood.

While we were waiting for our food, a couple of big young ladies in long dresses came in and sat near us. The dresses were very similar. The kind of thing you would imagine Auntie Em and her friends to wear back in Kansas. I think they may be called prairie dresses.

The women were not good-looking, and they had big feet. They didn’t appear to be wearing brassieres. They had fairly large breasts that needed, but lacked, support. One of them was wearing what I would call gladiator sandals. They had no makeup on. One of them had sideburns, which I failed to notice at first. I thought she had just combed her hair down in front of her ears.

They looked bizarre, dressed so oddly and so similarly. Like they had just escaped from a Mormon commune.

Soon after they came in, my wife let me know they were both men.

This shocked me. Ordinarily, trans-whatevers are obvious. I wasn’t in the mood to be observant, and I guess the sagging breasts fooled me.

The smaller guy had a great big septum ring. I believe the other guy had one, too, but I’m not sure.

A feeling came over me. It said, “This world is lost.” I realized my family lived in a precious bubble. There are children of darkness where we live, but the Christian population is very large, and the wicked haven’t been able to take over. It’s an unusual place. Gainesville is more typical of America. Although it’s small, the university’s presence gives it a culture like a big city. Most Americans live in and around cities, and almost all cities are lost.

No men’s room. No straws unless you ask for them. A hog ring in almost every nose. Men proudly wafting around in frumpy cotton dresses with little or nothing underneath. This is my country now.

Importantly, such people control the university; a type of portal just about every American is required to pass through if he ever expects to be successful and accepted. Going to college has become like joining the Freemasons. It’s like becoming a Mormon in Utah. You don’t have to do it, but expect to be blackballed if you don’t.

American kids think they have to go to college, even if they’re going to become cops or Burger King managers, and nearly every college is controlled by perverts, socialists, witches, minority members who hate whites, antisemites, militant atheists, man-haters, America-slanderers, backers of Islamist terror, and every conceivable type of pagan. “You want your child to be a success? You have to give him to US first.”

It’s like putting your baby through the fire to Moloch, except the baby comes out alive with a diploma that entitles him to a fair shot at employment as a fungible cubicle occupant.

America is done. It is absolutely finished. It’s nice that Trump won, but it doesn’t mean the climate or the trend has changed. If the Democrats hadn’t put two vegetables in a row up against him, we would be looking at a fourth Obama term. America will probably elect a Democrat in 2028.

I told my wife we have no place in this world.

I had this feeling that our situation was like living in America while we were at war with Japan, supposedly in the Pacific, and suddenly noticing that people around us here were Japanese and looking forward to taking over.

I told her about the plot of Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

People have decided they don’t need God in order to have pleasant lives. Worse, they have decided God is an obstacle. They have decided he is evil and that the world will progress and suddenly make a great leap forward (to borrow a phrase) when the world is rid of Christians as well as Jews.

Somehow Muslims aren’t considered problematic, in spite of mutilating girls’ genitals with kitchen knives, beating women for going outside with their faces uncovered, and murdering and hypocritically raping homosexual men.

I don’t know why the people we saw bought septum rings, apart from conformism. Maybe one or two of them think they’re close to God, and adopting a signature adornment of the children of darkness was just error. But seeing so many of them made me feel as though I were in a horror movie, waiting for someone to send an attack signal through the rings and yank the wearers into battle by their noses. A huge swarm of nose-ringed Agent Smiths.

To say I felt left out was an understatement.

It’s normal for younger people to make the mistake of altering their dress and appearance to upset older people, but it is very strange to see so many of them choose exactly the same ornament, as though they were threatened with prison time if they didn’t comply. Back in the Sixties, young people made all kinds of ill-conceived fashion and grooming choices, but there was way more variety. There was no single accessory nearly everyone felt compelled to wear.

While I thought about these things, I thought about the way my prayers have changed. These days I keep saying, “Yeshua, please come back and rule the world.” I want to cavalry to come save us. The waters are rising around us, and I don’t know how we are supposed to carve out futures for ourselves here. I don’t want us to become like Christians in Rome under Nero and Domitian.

As I was thinking about these things, I started to feel great peace about Marvin. I want Marvin to come back home and spend more years with us, but on the other hand, this world is a very bad place, and if God has decided Marvin should not have to be here when things get worse, then that’s how it is. Even a bird should not have to suffer here more than is necessary.

In somewhat-related news, I heard from my aunt the other day. The one who has been so abusive, and whom I believe uses the stubborn unsold remains of my grandparent’s estates to enrich herself and her family. She called about selling an inconsequential piece of land.

She couldn’t have been nicer. She behaved as though she had never attacked and insulted me, and she clearly expected me to act as though it had never happened.

I was polite.

She wanted to know if I still had my wife, which was a jarring question.

Now that I think about it, I guess it makes sense. I think her has been married three times. I have met three wives. There may have been others for all I know. Adultery and divorce are like musical chairs in her area. In most places, you ask a man how his wife is doing. In Eastern Kentucky, you ask if he’s still married to her.

My wife will have to sign things in order for the lot to be sold. Ostensibly, this is how she came into the conversation. My aunt asked if she were here with me. In America, I think she meant.

She asked about children, and I told her we had a son. She asked for photos, so I sent a couple, and she said he was “the cutest baby,” which is actually true. She asked if she could forward the pictures to her daughter, which was fine by me.

Before she hung up, she said it was good talking to me.

That could be the Parkinson’s talking for all I know. She has admitted she has some dementia because of it, and maybe she doesn’t remember insulting me and telling me she was going to do whatever she wanted with my inheritance regardless of my wishes. Strange thing for a fiduciary to say.

She likes bragging about her family; people whose relationships with me she helped end permanently. She told me she had an enormous grandson who was being recruited by Harvard for football as a high school sophomore. Harvard actually does that, although Ivy League schools don’t offer athletic scholarships.

My aunt’s family has had the misfortune to fall under the spell of Catholicism, the quasi-pagan and dominant branch of nominal Christianity. Her daughter married a Catholic, and my aunt converted. The city where my cousin lives has several prominent Catholic high schools dedicated to producing pro athletes, which is an extremely perverse goal for a Christian organization.

I don’t believe or disbelieve her. I don’t know what the truth is. This is the same aunt who said her daughter was likely to become Miss Kentucky, which wasn’t anywhere near true. She also said her son had been accepted by the University of Michigan’s prestigious law school when it was actually the University of WEST Michigan, which is the single worst law school in America. He ended up going to the second-worst.

Maybe the boy really is being courted by Harvard. This is not a school known for good football teams, so it wouldn’t be that remarkable if a big, smart kid who was playing pretty well in the 10th grade seemed like a fine prospect. They can’t get really good athletes because they all go elsewhere.

My understanding is that his dad is an accomplished individual and a good family man.

It amazes me that any Christian allows his son to play high school or college football, and no Christian should be in the NFL. Football takes a toll on the body, it causes brain damage, most players don’t get rich, most who get rich lose their money, it develops negative character traits like aggression, competitiveness, materialism, and pride, and it subjects players to armies of aggressive sluts. Combine all this with the fact that college and NFL football only exist because of gambling, and it’s a very unwholesome picture.

I thought about the horrible atmosphere at Harvard. I would not be happy if Harvard wanted my son. I want him to have a business and investments, and I want him to have a wonderful Christian wife and Spirit-led friends. I don’t want him to be tormented and assimilated by sick, vicious freaks for three years and eight months at my great expense.

She said another grandson was getting degrees in anthrolopogy and archaeology. I said, “I guess he’ll be a professor.” I thought that sounded positive.

Try and imagine a field more worthless and anti-Christian than anthropology. And archaeology sounds like employer repellent to me.

I had to take anthropology as an elective while I was getting a physics major and a math minor, and I found the whole business contemptible. The professor taught us made-up, implausible, unclever theories from a thin paperback text, and my studies for the entire semester took up less than one day. The final was a multiple-choice test. I got an A for breathing. Physics took about that much work every week. Physics was so hard, math seemed like a gut major in comparison. I spent about 4 hours a week doing homework for multiple advanced math courses, and I put in several times that much work for physics.

These things I say are literally true. Even good physics students are often unable to finish their homework, and my math courses, while hard by college standards, at least generated homework people could reasonably be expected to complete in a few hours a week.

With math homework, you quit when you know the problems are solved. With physics, you quit so you can get three hours of sleep before showering and going to class. You hope everyone else did as badly as you did, and usually, they did.

At the University of Texas, as a grad student, I asked my quantum professor about a particularly hard problem he had given us. I found it so hard to finish the math, which, I believe, was a long string of vector operations that would be easy to fumble, I bought a program called Mathematica and made my computer do it. I didn’t know if the result was right. I felt panicked.

He told me he hadn’t been able to do the problem. He asked me what I had come up with. True story.

His CV says he got his master’s at Cambridge with first class honors. Cambridge is where Newton and Hawking worked. Couldn’t do the homework he assigned.

His name is Fitzgerald. He’s still there. I should fly out there and egg his house.

Anthropology is just gossip, like the Talmud or the theories aborigines made up around campfires to explain their universe to their children. Giving your life to it is an appalling waste. It’s an insult to God, like playing golf. It says you have no idea how valuable your time here is.

It’s like going to college to become a phrenologist.

It also challenges the creation story, which is factual.

I’ll give you an example of anthropological science. You can Google to find out the actual details so you can repeat them in a comment as though you’re smarter than I am, although I’m actually just too lazy to check. A theory named after someone who may be named Hanson or Hansen says that people close to the equator have dark skin and long limbs, while the opposite is true in colder regions. Well…Eskimos. Mongolians. Thais. Indonesians. Slavs. Scandinavians. Amazon Basin Indians. See if you can see how they violate the theory. That’s some great science, that is.

Archaeology is a legitimate field of study. My main problem with it is that every time shaky research tends to discredit the Bible, it is lauded as proof, and then years later, the research is always discredited, after the damage is done. And academics who have been shown up don’t make any effort to inform the public. People keep quoting their nonsense decades later as though it were fact.

By its very nature, archaeology is incomplete. We have only dug up a tiny fraction of what’s out there. But archaeologists love to draw firm conclusions based on fragmented evidence.

These fields are bad choices. You shouldn’t pay for your kids to throw away years of their lives so they can become Uber drivers or do data entry, which is where liberal arts people often end up unless they become academics and try to join the opposite sex. Or they go to law school.

My mother got a degree in social work, so she had to become a realtor. You know those people you end up talking to when you call Mastercard about a charge you don’t recognize? Liberal arts majors.

If you want to have a revealing conversation, get together with a bunch of college graduates at least 35 years old and ask them what their majors were and what they do for a living. See how many of those history majors became historians. See how many of those philosophy majors became professional philosophers.

I don’t know this grandson. His name was not familiar to me because my family’s interest in including me in anything dried up and fell off years ago.

The family I loved and treasured lives only in my memories. He must be my aunt’s son’s son. I don’t know his siblings’ names or how many of them there are. I couldn’t pick him out of a lineup. I hope he finds a career that pays well. We prayed for my aunt’s whole family last night.

College should serve some purpose, but I would estimate that for most kids, it does not. I think most college kids major in fecklessly-chosen dead-end fields. The lofty notion that learning for its own sake justifies college rings a little hollow when the learning can cost half a million dollars and leave you years older, penniless and in uncancellable debt, filling out applications at Marshall’s and Walmart.

Liberal arts degrees made little sense even before the Internet, but now you can stuff your head with all sorts of knowledge all day for nearly nothing, so why would you pay someone thousands to tell you what Huckleberry Finn and Pride and Prejudice were about? And then end up not reading them and cramming from Cliff’s Notes.

Before I gave up secular entertainment, I saw some clips from a movie called The Company Men. It’s about a company that built ships. The white collar employees weren’t brilliant naval architects and engineers. They were unremarkable people who did work anyone could do. Negotiation. Sales. Submitting TPS reports.

Future AI targets.

America’s manufacturing base collapsed. Nobody wanted to build ships in America. The company cut lots and lots and lots of jobs.

Ben Affleck played a young executive who made 6 figures, had a nice house the bank owned, drove a Boxster the bank owned, and belonged to a country club. He was cocky. He thought he was important and too valuable and just plain wonderful to fire. Then they canned him without warning, and after being rejected by a long list of potential employers, he ended up getting a pity job from his brother-in-law, a carpenter.

I watched this movie and thought, “What do you expect to happen when you get paid a ton of money to do a job anyone else can do? What do you expect to happen when you’re not remarkable, you got a liberal arts degree, and you never developed any actual skills or learned anything useful?”

If this were a real company, the people who had important skills and knowledge that couldn’t be picked up in a month by a random Circle K clerk would have kept their jobs to the bitter end. If the company had gone under, other companies would have gone after them. They wouldn’t have chased the sociology or art history majors.

A doctor can always find work. An accountant can always find work. A guy who writes conjecture-filled papers about Sumerian poetry is not so blessed.

To circle back around to the point, I don’t see how anthropology and mainstream archaeology could have any importance to a Christian. They promote all sorts of faulty anti-Christian notions, and to make it in these fields, you pretty much have to buddy up to people who hate your religion. I don’t think an informed Spirit-led Christian could want anything to do with these fields.

My cousin the lawyer is not Spirit-led. That is obvious. The most reasonable guess is that his son is far from God and never had a chance to get to know him. I have a feeling law school is in his future.

I feel extremely distant from my family. They live in a different universe. Nearly all of them are in real trouble, but they don’t know it. I wish I could help them.

When my dad died, I took his ashes to Kentucky to be buried. He had an astonishing testimony of conversion and reconciliation with God. At the sparsely-attended viewing, I told the whole story to my cousin the lawyer as well as his wife and another male cousin. Didn’t make a dent. My aunt wasn’t there, but I’m sure I told her the story by phone, and she only got worse after that. One cousin visited me for Christmas the following year, and I baptized her in my pool, so I have hope for her.

I have heard from the animal hospital, and at the time of the call, Marv was perking up. They had run a number of tests. Marv had eaten a little. They seem to expect him to make it through the night.

What a privilege it has been, owning that sweet little bird. I have been a miserable excuse for a caretaker. I hope God sends Marv home to me so I can do better and better every day.

Stop Touching That!

The crown prince keeps making advances faster than we expect. Every new step brings a mixture of joy and pain. We want him to develop and grow to be a man, but I am going to miss this baby a great deal. Once he’s gone, he is gone for good.

Today I awakened, rolled over, and saw a big toothless smile about 6 inches in front of me. My son was as happy as a groupie watching Mick Jagger step out of a limo. And he was lying on his side!

My wife was reluctant to push him to roll over and lie on his stomach, so he has not been quick to develop in this area. He did not learn to roll quickly. She finally admitted her mistake and relented. He yelled and thrashed a lot, but he eventually decided to man up and learn.

This morning, he outdid himself. He lay on his back between us, and when he wanted attention from one of us, he would roll in the appropriate direction. He kept going back and forth. It was a great thing to see.

His mom says he plays with her now. He pokes and grabs her and waits to see her reaction, as if she were the baby.

We just got him a sippy cup, and he sometimes takes a little water. He has started choosing what he wants. Sometimes he insists on feeding from his mother. Sometimes he wants milk or formula from a bottle. Now he is also trying to get water. He seems to demand solid food instead of liquid from time to time.

He pushes things away when he doesn’t want them.

We have to watch him around baby wipes. Our practice has been to drop one over his crotch during diaper changes to block surprise attacks, but now he likes to grab them and chew on them to get the liquid out. He can also tear them. My wife found a piece of one in his mouth a day or two back. I hope that was the only piece he managed to cram in there, because it was all we found.

He looks like an adult sometimes. He gets quiet and looks very serious while he does things, as if he is thinking hard. He seems oddly mature until it passes and he starts screaming over nothing.

Last night, he only woke up once. His mother was very pleased. She now has hopes she will be able to sleep so her memory starts working again. I am tired of closing the refrigerator door for her.

I am cautious about making biased-parent predictions, but I think he is going to be very, very smart. These days, medical science and other fields related to childrearing are shaped largely by political concerns, not evidence, so it is fashionable to say kids who develop early aren’t necessarily smart. You’re also not supposed to say a baby’s intelligence is related to the size of his head. But if you dig into the subject, you learn that babies who develop quickly are likely to be smarter as adults, and there is a relationship between head size and intelligence. My son keeps passing milestones fast, and he has an enormous melon on him.

He seems to have high social intelligence. That’s good. Nobody wants a math nerd who repels women, moves to a cabin, and mails people bombs.

When I was a baby, my mother was in a drugstore in Tampa, and I was with her. An old Jewish man looked at me and said, “He’s going to be brilliant. He has a big head.” I love that story. A blessing combined with a staggering lack of tact. Maybe he was just trying to make her feel good about my appearance.

My son inherited a big head, and I hope the God of the Jews will put something good in it.

Wanted: a Machine That Sews Ralph Lauren Horses on Baby Clothes

The crown prince keeps surprising us.

My son is now in his 6th month, which means he is not yet 6 months old (for those who didn’t pay attention in math class). A couple of weeks back, he started imitating us.

He was already smiling back at us. I don’t know if that’s imitation or not. His new thing is imitating hand movements.

When he was maybe a month old, I decided infancy was no excuse for laziness, so I started doing what I call “the math game.” I made a circle with my hand and said “zero.” I showed him one finger and said “one.” You can probably guess the rest. If not, send me an email.

This is one of his favorite things on earth. He glows with a kind of ecstasy when his parents play the math game. He grabs our fingers like he is touching something miraculous and awe-inspiring.

I don’t know why I call it a game, since all he has to do is lie there.

A couple of weeks back, if memory serves, his mother told me he was trying to make numbers with his own hands. I thought she could be giving him too much credit, but I was open to the possibility.

Today I was making red chicken curry, and the boy was watching from his swing. I kept talking to him and acknowledging him because I know he craves my attention and feels rejected if I do something like walking through a room without talking to him.

I looked over, and he was trying to get my attention by holding his left hand out and extending various fingers at me. He was not able to do numbers, but he was varying the fingers he showed me and looking at my eyes to see how I reacted.

I have no idea whether this is normal, but it surprised me. He can’t talk. He can’t walk. He doesn’t seem to know his face is like my face, because the only expression he repeats back to me is a smile. But he knows his hands are like his parents’ hands. I guess this is easier to figure out that facial expressions, because he can see his hands, but he can’t see his face.

He is also sitting up, sort of. If you sit him down on a flat surface, he will eventually flop over and give up, but if you sit him against something, particulary in a corner with good support, he is happy to remain in a sitting position and play.

Still no crawling. I don’t think he’s trying. He climbs up his mother’s side in bed just fine, but I don’t think he has motivation to try to crawl over any kind of distance, because he never has to.

He seems to have passed out of the phase where he stuck his tongue out at everything. It made for some great pictures. He is now in the phase where he screams at the top of his lungs just to hear himself. He loves it. It sounds like someone being tortured, but he does it when he’s very happy.

He scratches himself. Particularly his crotch. I hope he quits doing that soon. When the diaper comes off, the scratching starts.

The other day, he tried to make his mother shut up. At least we think he did. We were doing something we are not supposed to do. We disagreed about something in front of him, and his mother was getting a little loud. He reached up and tried to shut her mouth, more than once. Or at least it looked that way.

Solid food is going okay. He has reacted to at least one food by turning red. Hives. His digestion seemed to bother him yesterday, so we decided to give him most of a day with nothing but milk and formula.

I hate formula, but keeping up with this kid is not easy. He keeps growing, and he is taking in more calories than ever. The other day, I grabbed one of his hands, and I realized it wasn’t the tiny baby hand I had gotten used to loving. It was like a big, thick pork chop. His weight has more than doubled, and he has grown over an inch per month.

Lugging him around in parking lots and businesses is getting difficult. Between him and the hefty car seat, it’s like carrying a big suitcase. His mom uses carriers a lot now; those sling things that wrap around the mother’s body. We are going to have to get real and start taking the stroller with us.

His personality is wonderful. He loves us intensely. He stares at us. When I sleep, he stares at me and smiles because when I snore, he thinks I’m talking to him.

He likes people. He smiles at them and finds them fascinating. The other day we ate at a restaurant, and he sat facing another table. A couple was seated there. When I picked him up to leave, the husband told us they were not okay with him leaving. They had been having a pantomime conversation with him while we ate.

He still cries a lot. I think he hates being away from his mother. When he has something to do, he forgets about her, but that lasts 40 minutes, tops. Then he wants what he probably sees as the rest of him back.

She spends a huge amount of time with him. Too much, I think. I find her lying in the bed in the middle of the day, flying him around over her like an airplane. We have a recliner for nursing in the corner of the bedroom, and she must be spending 8 hours a day there with my son sitting on her. I have been making her get dressed and leave the room, and he usually leaves with her.

He is crazy about his mother, and the feeling is mutual. She sings him songs she made up. “Changing Baby’s Diaper.” That’s a major hit. The other day I found a $500 American Express charge for Ralph Lauren baby clothes. We had to have a chat. She loves dressing him up.

I complained to some female friends, and they backed my wife up. I should have seen that coming.

I didn’t know there were five hundred dollars’ worth of baby clothes on Earth. My wife is now on a spending moratorium that goes well into next month.

He wakes me up. He can’t wait for me to wake on my own. He gazes at me and waits. I hear his noises, and I look over and see that radiant, overjoyed face staring at me, like I’m the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. I grab him and play with him, and he thinks it’s fantastic until he abruptly gets hungry and starts crying for his mother.

He is trying to talk, but it’s all gibberish so far. I suppose we will hear a real word very shortly. It should make me happy, but I’ll be sad because he’s such a wonderful baby. I want him to grow up to be a man, but I also want to keep the little guy we have right now.

He has been chewing his toes for quite a while. Ever since he could get at them. I don’t know if he knows they’re his.

He’s in a crib now. He got too tall for the bassinet. We shoved the crib up beside the bed where the bassinet had been, and now we have to think about the day he will move to the nursery and we won’t have him with us all night.

Every time he does something new, I feel a mixture of joy and sadness. I wonder if parents look forward to having second children because they miss the baby experience.

I have said I didn’t know what I did to deserve such a wonderful baby, but the truth is, I know I didn’t do anything. I didn’t get what I deserved. I got an extraordinary gift in spite of all the evil I had done.

We are involving him in prayer now, so we expect him to consider this normal, and we believe he will know God personally early on. We pray he will be saved and baptized with the Holy Spirit early on. We can’t guarantee that he will be a man of God, but I believe he will. He’s getting help we never got.

That Little White Thing Behind the Grass is my House

The Kubota mower saga continues. The mower which was supposed to be my deliverer has become my captor, forcing me to spend hours and hours working on it. Yesterday I had to come up with a new strategy to fix it.

Clearly, this means I have to discuss Richard Feynman.

Being smart is a good thing, obviously, but it has its drawbacks. It can actually cause you to behave stupidly in practice. If you go through life figuring things out effortlessly or having answers just come to you, you can find yourself floundering when a puzzle is actually challenging, because you haven’t done what less-intelligent people do when confronted with hard questions. You haven’t come up with logical strategies to solving problems. As a result, you may find yourself struggling with problems people with less brains cope with more easily. You sit there waiting for answers to come, cycling through ideas that have already failed, like a bear pawing at a combination lock.

Richard Feynman claimed his IQ was 125. And Oprah claimed she lost like 150 pounds in about a month without drugs. Feynman had an impish sense of humor, so I guess this was one of his little jokes, intended to upset less-intelligent people who knew their IQ’s were up in the 180 range and make them wonder how Mr. 125 had left them in the dust.

I don’t think his IQ was 125, but I think that if it had been, he would have punched above his weight because of his approach to thinking.

I read a story he wrote about ants. He saw ants marching around in a dorm room, and he started asking himself why they did certain things. Using bait and some other handy objects, he was able to do several experiments and uncover some pretty remarkable facts about ants. He was systematic. He developed logical approaches. He didn’t sit back and think, “I’m a genius, so I’ll know the answer in a minute regardless of what I do.”

I thought about that story yesterday after a most miserable day working on my new mower in the heat and roasting sun. It was starting intermittently when I got it, and then it just plain quit, and I had to start hot-wiring it.

When I looked for answers, I decided the smart thing was to take care of the easiest and/or most likely and/or cheapest fixes instead of getting into a lot of diagnostic drudgery. If they worked, great. If not, I would have new parts in my mower which couldn’t hurt anything and might help it stay running longer without problems.

This kind of approach only works when you get lucky, which usually happens for me, but in this case, didn’t.

Having suffered considerably in the process of replacing two safety switches that were likely to have failed but actually hadn’t, I decided to change course and take the Feynman approach. I went to AI sites, I looked at the workshop manual, and I tried to make deductions and formulate a plan.

I came up with 5 problems that could prevent a mower from cranking. The seat switch had been bypassed, and the crude, bubbastic bypass connection could be failing. A safety switch on the brake, the PTO lever, or one of the mower control levers could be bad. The starter or solenoid (one indivisible package) could be bad. The starter relay could need replacing. Finally, the ignition switch could be no good.

It was also possible the mower’s electronic controller needed replacing, but that was too unlikely to consider at this point.

By the time I made the list, the switches on the PTO lever and brake had already been replaced needlessly, and I knew the starter and solenoid were fine, so I moved on. I tried to come up with a smart sequence of things to look at.

The seat switch splice had to be my first stop because it could get me going in 5 minutes. It seemed likely to be the problem because the mower had started once after I moved the seat. It was also an extremely simple fix. Find the splice and redo it with a wire nut. Tools not required.

Number two: the starter relay. This was not as likely to be the culprit as the safety switches, but checking it with an ohmmeter was a 10-minute job requiring the ohmmeter, a wrench, and a screwdriver.

Number three: the safety switches. The remaining switches were not nearly as hard to replace as the ones I had already worked on, but they were harder to deal with than the relay, so I would leave them for later. Testing them would be simple. They had to be open for the mower to run, so I can just disconnect them.

Number four: the ignition switch. Kubota didn’t make a point of creating handy test points for people with bad ignition switches, and getting the switch out to test it is unpleasant. I could test it by opening a connector on the wiring harness to expose a couple of conductors. That would be more pleasant than removing the switch, but still unpleasant. The switch worked fine in every position except the start position, so I figured it was probably okay.

Today I identified the starter solenoid by the colors of the wires going into it, and it took me two minutes or so to get it out. The manual lists the proper resistances between the terminals, and the relay failed one test. I went to Ebay and ordered three new relays (the mower uses the same kind of relay for three things), and they are on the way. They’re $10 each, and if one has failed, the others could be on the way out.

Will the new relay get my mower running? No idea, but it should. I can test my theory by moving one of the other relays to the starter position. One relay only controls a horn that goes off when the mower overheats, so I can do without that for a few days.

I should have switched the relays after testing the bad one, but what can I tell you? It’s hot outside. Feynman would be ashamed of me.

If the relays don’t help me, I have to test the safety and ignition switches, and after that, I have to consider the possibility that a $332 controller has bitten the dust. I think I tested the relay correctly, though, and the mower can’t start if it’s bad, so I have every reason to think I will not need a controller.

I caused myself a lot of very unpleasant and unnecessary work by guessing at the mower’s ailment. If Feynman were here, he would have gotten where I am in two days. Nobody could do it faster except someone who is familiar with Kubotas. Two days is how long it would take to understand the starting system, including an hour or two to come up with a plan.

I should try to take the Feynman approach to problems from now on, during what little remains of my life. Prayer first. Then research and logic. I can’t get back all the hours I’ve spent nullifying my intelligence by hoping answers fall out of the sky, but I should be able to benefit to some limited degree.

The Rapture Starts Within You

Today is an unusual day. The alarm baby failed to go off. I had to wake up on my own.

Usually, at least an hour before I want to wake up, I hear burbling and cooing sounds behind me, and I roll over to see a little head about 6 inches away from my face, with two happy little eyes staring right at me, like I’m the sky and it’s the Fourth of July. It’s the heir apparent, who has yet again conned his way out of the bassinet and onto the bed.

After this comes a certain amount of squeezing and poking the baby, who literally screams with joy at the top of his lungs. Both of his parents have loud voices, and our genes have done their stuff.

The message is clear: this guy does not yet fully understand the rottenness of the planet he came to.

Having a son has taught me all sorts of things. One thing it has taught me is that adults understand how filthy and cruel this world is, even if we deny it to ourselves every day. You can see this in the products we create for babies and the advice we give each other.

Just about everything sold for babies is covered with comforting images. Puppies and kittens. Lion cubs sitting on clouds. Flowers. Little frogs who look overjoyed to see us. Pastel colors are the norm.

We are obsessed with helping babies relax. Products say “soothing” on their labels. Experts create videos telling us how to relax babies and make them feel safe.

The songs we sing to babies are delusional. Mr. Raccoon took a walk to the meadow to dance with all his bunny friends. Stuff like that.

Why do we do this? Because we know this world is vile and that we are in grave danger every second of our lives. When we tell kids to relax because everything will be okay, we’re lying to them to keep them from understanding the world until they’re strong enough to stand living here.

We don’t put unicorns and happy bunnies on our own things (most of us), because it would be pointless, but we dedicate a tremendous amount of effort to relaxation. We go to spas to relax. Catholics go on retreats. Pagans meditate. Lots of people get drunk, smoke weed, and use narcotics. Christians pray. We create products that are supposed to relax us.

Why do we do these things? There is a need; thats why. If the world weren’t a terrible place, we’d be relaxed already.

It’s amazing how often we make ourselves stop looking at the ugliness of the world. All through the day, we are confronted with murder, war, disease, accidents, crime, and so on, and, realizing there is nothing we can do and that we will not be able to function if we keep focusing on danger and evil, we choose to think of other things. This isn’t the way a healthy world works.

God has told us what a world that functions correctly looks like. Here is what he said through Isaiah:

The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them.

And the cow and the bear shall feed; their young ones shall lie down together: and the lion shall eat straw like the ox.

And the sucking child shall play on the hole of the asp, and the weaned child shall put his hand on the cockatrice’ den.

They shall not hurt nor destroy in all my holy mountain: for the earth shall be full of the knowledge of the Lord, as the waters cover the sea.

Through John, he said:

And I saw a new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away; and there was no more sea.

And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God.

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

This is what the world will look like after the tribulation, when Yeshua rules here in person.

Religious Jews claim Yeshua can’t be the Messiah because these things haven’t happened yet. They believe the Messiah will not be killed and then return, but that’s wrong. The Bible clearly says he will be cut off. Jewish scholars have made up a lot of spurious interpretations of prophecy to justify their bad decisions and to absolve their forebears of the sin of killing Yeshua as they killed other prophets.

Modern Christians would hate Yeshua if he returned, and Christians persecute people who hear from the Holy Spirit, so it makes no sense to single Jews out, especially given that no Jew who took part in the crucifixion is alive now.

It’s strange that we don’t persecute Italians, when Romans were the ones who scourged Yeshua and nailed him to the cross.

Imagine a world where you don’t have to lock your doors, create passwords, take vaccines, support armies, carry a gun, or buy insurance. Imagine walking through Harlem at 3 a.m. and being greeted by friendly people instead of being sent to the hospital or the morgue. Imagine a world without Muslim terror or Islam. The world we have now is repulsive.

I hate this place more every day. It reminds me of moving out of Miami. Miami got to where every day there was oppressive and distasteful, and then one day I drove away and put it behind me. And I never missed it. I hate Miami more now than when I left, and I haven’t been there since 2020. If a friend of mine gets married or has a funeral in Miami, I will send flowers and stay here.

As much as I love the county where I live, I hate the world, and I feel like I’m holding my breath until the rapture comes.

Now I have a wife and a baby son, and I have to look after them in this nasty place. My son is innocent. He is full of joy. He loves his parents. Worse, he trusts us, even though we can’t save him from all suffering. My heart aches to protect him. Having a family makes the world seem even more foul.

I have quit looking at the news and secular entertainment again. I tell people to avoid secular entertainment because it brings curses and evil spirits into homes, but I was looking at Youtube clips of movies, and I realized this was hypocritical. The farther I get from my connection to filth, the more God restores proper perspective, and the better I understand the depravity of the world.

When I think of human depravity, I always think of a story I saw on Yahoo News. The Kardashian sisters had a contest. Two of them were arguing over whose genitalia smelled worse. They provide samples, and the third sister was the judge. And a national news outlet covered it, just like it would have covered groundbreaking for a skyscraper 70 years ago. As if it were normal and acceptable to put such “news” in front of the public.

Mind you, the Kardashians made the press cover it. Journalists didn’t magically realize they were sniffing each other. An insider had to tell them. The Kardashians had someone call around and tell the press they were smelling each other’s crotches. That’s the kind of people they are.

The public didn’t rise up in arms. No one protested outside Yahoo headquarters. No one marched to have the filthy Kardashian show canceled. No one called for fasting and prayer. These things would have happened in a healthy nation. If these revolting sluts had had their contest in 1950, the ensuing scandal would still be famous today.

Now, female entertainers rap about the wonders of their infected private parts and those of their many partners, and their garbage becomes major hits parents let their kids listen to. Kids have smartphones, and they send each other homemade child porn all day. Parents pay deranged doctors to castrate their sons, and about half of Americans get furious when anyone says it’s wrong.

The generations that understood decency are mostly dead now. My generation is depraved, and the ones that came after are much worse.

I’ve noticed something about environments with a high turnover rate, like schools. Consider an elementary school with a fiery 6th-grade president who promises change. Do the teachers worry? No, they sit back, smile, and wait. They know the problem student will leave, and the students who follow will have no idea he ever existed.

Satan works the same way. He comes between generations. He convinces stupid kids they’re smarter than their elders. He cuts young generations off from the accumulated wisdom of earlier generations. The world has had many reformers. Abraham, Moses, Samson, Josiah, the prophets, Yeshua…their reforms generally get undone after they go. The people who remember how things are supposed to be die.

This may be hard to believe, but Americans didn’t always avoid and make fun of older people. The phenomenon of hating our elders and repudiating their teaching is so new, they popularized a term for it in the 1960’s: the Generation Gap. I used to hear this term all the time, but I’ll bet there are very few 40-year-olds who have heard it. Now, we accept the fact that young people consider “boomers” stupid and backward, and we assume earlier generations felt the same way about their elders. It’s true that people have always complained of differences between generations, but the hostility and contempt we consider normal now are aberrations.

Satan had to have the Generation Gap in order to convince Cher’s mentally-ill daughter to have her healthy breasts amputated. The extreme and accelerated moral deterioration we see now couldn’t have happened so quickly without a change in the way we saw older people. Satan had to get us to defecate on everything valuable and embrace everything that is full of pus and poison.

I don’t think today’s young adults can possibly comprehend how young people were worshiped during the 1960’s. People a few years older than I was lectured and scolded their elders. Showbiz pea-brains marveled at the genius of youth, because there was good money in juvenile rebellion. People who should have had better sense treated conceited twentyish simpletons as though they knew all the answers. College kids celebrated terrorists and communists, but we thought the children would lead us to the Age of Aquarius and everyone would get peace, love, and free dope.

Many older people got involved. It was pathetic. Actors and singers from earlier years saw their fan bases vanishing. They realized they were becoming figures of ridicule. They put on idiotic Sixties clothes, tried to sing rock songs, and imitated the spastic, forced jerking that passed for dancing among children and college kids. Cary Grant started taking LSD and telling people it would solve their problems.

Young people are supposed to sit at the feet of the old and absorb everything good that they know, so they live in victory and don’t repeat the devastating mistakes of their predecessors. In the Sixties, university presidents groveled before screaming, vicious, spoiled morons in bell-bottom pants and tie-dyed shirts, apologizing for the accomplishments and virtues of two thousand years of Christian culture.

Now the same basic thing is happening again, and the people groveling learned their behavior from the Sixties.

It’s a shame young people can’t see how their grandparents behaved in 1968. They can’t see how stupid and silly they were. If they could, they might have less respect for fashionable idiocy and more respect for wisdom that stood the test of centuries.

It’s impossible to make people understand the profundity and breadth of modern depravity if you can’t make them understand America as it once was. They think, “Okay, Boomer,” and they continue wallowing joyfully in disgraceful, ungrateful, unteachable ignorance.

Deep in their hearts, they know their ways are wrong, and they know the world is a mess, but as long as they can smother the truth and prevent it from filling their thoughts, they will keep doing what they do.

Kids think boomers ruined the world by preventing what kids call progress. That’s wrong. We ruined it by promoting it. We just seem like we’re against it when we are contrasted with the nuts and brats of today.

Sometimes I feel like I should do nothing but pray for the rapture and tribulation all day.

Next Progressive Move: Replace “York” with “Nuremberg”

Years ago, God showed me that when human behavior makes no sense, it means there is a supernatural reason. We think our natural intelligence guides our decisions, but in reality, we are surrounded by demons that push us all the time, and only people who are led by the Holy Spirit are safe. This is why we have seen insane behaviors like the massacre of the Jews by two of the world’s civilized and advanced countries.

Jewish people are generally atheists, and very few know their Messiah or the Holy Spirit. They are also high-priority targets for Satan because God has a special place in his heart for them. As a result, they are under heavy demonic influence, and they exhibit bizarre self-hating and self-destructive behavior. This is particularly true in politics, where they have helped their enemies a great deal. For example, they supported the communist revolution in Russia, and then Jews in the USSR endured decades of persecution.

Here in the US, Jews commit gradual mass suicide in polling booths every year. For a long time, it has been very clear that American leftists have become enemies of Jews, and it is equally obvious that the only powerful friends Jews have in the world are American conservative Christians, yet Jews continue to perceive conservative Christians as closet Nazis, and they hold onto the perverse belief that leftist politicians are their saviors.

The Jews are the smartest people there are. Testing has proven it over and over. Their accomplishments prove it. Natural intelligence hasn’t helped them figure out politics. They are blinded by demons because they can’t hear the Holy Spirit, and many religious Jews think their Messiah, who has made it plain he wants to save Israel, is a sorcerer who boils in feces and semen in hell.

Now it looks like they are going to assure the election of a New York mayoral candidate who hates Israel, supports a movement that drives the beating of Jews by the general public around the world, believes the Twelfth Imam will rise and take over the world for Islam, and intends to arrest Benjamin Netanyahu for some reason or other if he ever visits the city.

New York is a giant leftist bedpan where Democrats have a 6-to-1 advantage, so there is no possibility a conservative will win the race. That makes it a contest among leftists, and Zohran Mamdani has already won the Democrat primary, decisively. Andrew Cuomo and Eric Adams plan to run as independents, but if they had any chance of winning, they would probably have beaten Mamdani in the primary.

Jewish voters make up about 13% of the electorate in New York City, so there is no way Mamdani won without widespread support among Jews. This should not surprise anyone. Jews are prominent in the pro-Hamas movement in America, so no one should be shocked that many of them voted for someone who advocates for pogroms.

Mamdani endorses the slogan, “Make the intifada global.” For millennials who don’t know anything, I’ll point out that “intifada” is a term that was used in past decades to describe the practice of attacking, beating, and killing random Jews in Israel.

Deceitful apologists, many Jews among them, claim it describes peaceful resistance, but I was alive back when the term was first popularized, so I remember what really happened. While there was peaceful resistance, there were also riots, murders, beatings, and many acts of terrorism against innocent Jews. This is what people my age recall when they hear the word. This is what we saw on the news.

Calling the intifada peaceful is like using the phrase “mostly peaceful” to describe domestic-terror riots perpetrated by BLM and Antifa. Every riot is mostly peaceful. World War Two at its height was mostly peaceful. When violent conflicts occur, the actual violence is generally concentrated to small areas; 9/11 was mostly peaceful. Calling the intifada peaceful is like having a single huge cancerous tumor and saying you are mostly well.

In Europe, the word “pogrom” is used to describe activities consistent with the intifada. A pogrom is a violent attack on Jews and/or their property. During the rise of Hitler and World War Two, and even afterward, Europeans in Germany, Austria, and even some non-Axis nations popularized pogroms.

This is what Mamdani supports, openly. It wasn’t leaked by a witness to private conversations. It doesn’t come from a “hot mike” moment. He is happy to stand in front of cameras and say it.

He also endorses the slogan “From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.” This is literally a call for ending Israel and ridding it of all Jews. Israel stretches from the Jordan River to the Mediterranean Sea, and Palestine does not.

Antisemites like to claim they oppose Israel’s actions, not Jews as a people. That’s a lie. Intifada isn’t limited to Israel, Israelis, or the Israeli military. It’s aimed at all Jewish people. Random pedestrians in traditional Jewish garb. Anyone who wears a yarmulke.

It’s like the “pro-Palestinian” movement in the US, which has manifested in protesting Jewish (not Israeli) businesses and terrorism against Jewish (not Israeli) individuals in America.

I think Mamdani will win, and it will be a lot like the moment at the 2012 Democrat Convention when, in a voice vote, attendees voted overwhelmingly against including the terms “God” and “Jerusalem” in the DNC platform. Antonio Villaraigosa presided over the vote, and when the crowd voted, he knew what it had voted for. He looked around for help from his superiors, and then he lied and claimed the vote had gone the other way.

To honest observers, this was a pivotal moment, because it put the Democratic Party’s blossoming hatred of God and Israel on full display. When Mamdani takes office, leftist Jews will have their noses rubbed in the antisemitism of the political faction they support as though it were God.

New York should be a shocking spectacle after Mamdani takes over. Battles between ICE and the police. Mobs at tax-funded grocery stores. Real groceries shutting down. Perverts ruling the city even more than they do now. Jews afraid to go outside. White people concerned that they’re next, as they pay taxes expressly aimed at them in violation of federal law. But most Jews will continue voting for Democrats. Of that, you can be assured. Short of building crematoriums, there is nothing the DNC can do to alienate them.

New York City has the second-largest population of Jews, after Israel. If this can happen in New York, how can anyone be safe in our other cities?

Grieve Bad Company Instead of the Holy Spirit

This morning, I prayed for more internal rapturing.

I believe there will be a rapture. I believe God will literally remove his children from the world when he decides the abuse they put up with is no longer acceptable when juxtaposed with the number of new salvations they produce. After that, the tribulation will come. The harshest period of evangelism in the history of the world. People will be tormented so badly, those who can still be saved will drop their pride and pretense and go on to be with God. The rest will prove themselves incapable of changing, and they’ll go on to burn.

Those who belong to God will get some relief. Being around useless people is vexatious.

I also believe people who will be taken in the rapture will be ready because God will have worked inside them to cut their ties to this world. They will be eager to get out. They won’t be popular. They will be disgusted and wearied by the world’s culture. They will love God as a person, and they will love being near him. They won’t just obey rules and hope for the best. To me, this is internal rapturing.

A lot of Christians seem to think God will reach into the seats at porn theaters and filthy rap performances and pull people out just because they participated in altar calls in years past. They think he’ll grab people who support abortion, disgusting perversions, pride, and socialism. They believe he’ll take lukewarm people who are full of earthly ambition. All of that is wrong.

One of the great things about my life is that God has separated me from society. He got me out of Miami, which is a disgusting, sinful, coarse, lowbrow city, and he moved me to the reddest, most Christian county in Florida. He gave me income without work, so I don’t have to network with other lawyers and keep my Christianity stifled in order to avoid trouble. He gave me a wife who knows him. He helped me shed horrible friends who weren’t friends at all, and he replaced them with people who know him.

When I prophesy, I keep hearing him say he is destroying the world’s ways in me. I’m all for it. I can’t change myself, but I do want to be changed. I want more internal rapturing.

Today I prayed about it, and later on, while I was thinking of other things, I started deleting electronic contacts.

My wife and I have a WhatsApp group I created so our friends could keep track of her delivery. We kept the group going, and people like seeing updates on my son’s progress.

I think of WhatsApp as a texting app, and I always say I don’t have social media accounts, but to some degree, WhatApp is a form of social media. It allows you to post “status” updates that vanish after 24 hours. This never appealed to me until recently, but my wife posts statuses, and sometimes my friends do.

I started posting a few things. Then I saw that someone I knew from my last church was looking at my statuses, and she posted a few of her own.

We were friends. She said all sorts of things that made her seem passionate about God. But she was also sexually provocative, and she posted odd things on Facebook. For example, she called her brother her “side piece.”

She and her husband had marital issues, and afterward, she started putting up Instagram photos of herself in bathing suits and exercise clothes. I don’t know if her kids saw them.

I guess things are going badly for them again, because she just put up some statuses of herself, and they didn’t look promising. In one, she was doing a sexually suggestive dance with her teenage son. In another, she was in her car in a bikini and cutoffs, with the zipper of the cutoffs pulled down and spread. She was shaking her breasts. She had a big tattoo on her belly, and it continued under her bathing suit, so it’s a crotch tattoo.

She is looking for a husband. I posted a status consisting of a photo of my son. Later, I blocked my view of her statuses.

Today I thought about her, and that’s why I started deleting contacts. I have known this lady for 15 years, and I deleted her. She is not going anywhere with God soon, and I don’t need to see her lewd videos.

I’m not angry with her, but what am I supposed to do with a friend like that?

In law school, I had a friend who was very seductive. She told me about her bedroom adventures with multiple people. She loved the perversion series Queer as Folk, and she got me to watch it. I thought it was gross, because it was. She said I was homophobic.

She ended up moving to LA and becoming an entry-level employee at a big talent agency. She borrowed money from me while she was getting established, and I never saw it again. Women don’t repay loans. I visited her there once, and her friends were off-putting. Snippy gays. Shallow people. The kind of LA people who often wake up on other people’s couches and chairs.

She visited South Florida once and took me to lunch, and I told her how I had changed. I told her about my new life as a reformed Christian. She said she could see I had peace, and she was glad for me. She clearly was not interested in making a change in her own life.

On one occasion, she called me and said she was pregnant. She talked about how a child would derail her career. She wanted advice. I told her I couldn’t go along with abortion. When she asked why, which surprised me, I said I was a Christian. That made her angry. She said, “So am I!” She had her baby killed.

She ended up working as a minor network executive. I just looked, and it appears that after that, she became a freelance TV producer. That sounds like gig work. She is credited with 4 shows between 2016 and 2021, for a total of 44 episodes. At present, she is the president of a production company that has been around since 2019 and hasn’t gotten much of anywhere. It was started by a B-list movie star.

She wanted to be a big player. It seems like she sold herself out for a pretty small payout.

I’ve known her for 31 years. I like her. We got along well. We had a lot of fun. I deleted the contact today. It’s final. It would be very hard for her to locate me if she wanted to reestablish contact, and I won’t be looking for her, so she’s gone.

I deleted other nominal Christians. Our relationships had no future, so why not? I won’t see them again here on Earth, and I probably won’t see any of them in the afterlife. There is no point in continuing to invest myself in them.

While I was deleting contacts, I thought about the prayer I had prayed a little earlier. God was granting my request. I was being raptured internally.

The world has gotten so old; so polarized. I can’t believe God will let is wait much longer. There seems to be so little left here for his children.

Finally Getting Off the John

The big day may finally be here. I may be getting a “new” used diesel mower to replace the old John Deere 430. I can’t contain my joy. I found a deal I like on the web.

I say “may” because I’m used to getting bitten in the butt with respect to Internet deals. As well as everything else. You know how it is. People buy stuff out from under you. The things you think are good deals turn out to be junk. I will say “may” until the mower is in my driveway.

I still marvel that people love the John Deere 430 so much. Say anything bad about it on a landscaping or farming forum, and you may be challenged to a duel. “They run forever.” “They’re bulletproof.” People routinely pay $3,000 for 430’s in reasonably good shape, in spite of the fact that the newest ones are well over 30 years old. Mine is 34.

I have a lot of bad things to say about my mower, although I can’t complain at all about the smoking deal I got on it.

First, the deck weighs about 350 pounds, and it has to be removed in order to change the blades or the oil. You can jack the mower up if you dare. Personally, I don’t want to climb under a 1500-pound mower with a short wheelbase when it’s reared up at 45 degrees.

Removing the deck is a horrible chore. It’s supposed to be quick and convenient, which it probably was in John Deere showrooms with new mowers that had no corrosion and which had been carefully prepared by mechanics. To get the deck off, I have to remove one deck wheel, turn two other wheels sideways, remove some pins that don’t like to come out, turn a lever that doesn’t like to turn, jack up the front of the mower, probably do some other things I forgot, and drag the deck out by brute force.

Putting the deck back on is just as difficult.

Having moaned about that, I would now like to moan about the unavailability of new parts, which have always been way overpriced. A few years back, Deere started discontinuing commonly-replaced parts the mower really needs in order to function. First, it was the grille. Eventually, they got around to replacing their proprietary, non-repairable hydraulic cylinders. Now the muffler ($450, if memory serves) is off the menu. The deck is also unavailable.

With that behind me, I will now complain about the difficulty of working on the mower. Everything is cramped. Things that should be easy to replace are hard to replace. To add hydraulic fluid, you have to pour it into a tube with an inner diameter of maybe 3/8″. That is simply amazing.

One belt runs the water pump and alternator, and changing it is like doing a heart transplant through a dirty keyhole. While lying on your back. Everything is hard to get to, you can’t swing a wrench, and none of the bolts want to turn. And you have to take the tractor’s whole seat-and-fender pan off.

Finally, I hate the throttly thing. This mower has a hydrostatic transmission, which means you use one control to change the speed and direction. It’s a shift lever on the dash. When mowing in a yard like mine, you need to change speed and direction a lot, and modern mowers use things like pedals and control bars to make it easy.

I guess zero-radius-turn or “zero-turn” mowers got their name from the fact that they use the drive wheels to do all the turning and traveling. They’re like wheelchairs. To turn, you make one wheel go faster than the other. To rotate in place, you reverse one wheel and make the other go forward. You don’t have to move to turn around.

Going from forward to reverse or changing speed with the Deere is jerky and generally no fun. It’s not easy to control, and you have to take one hand off the wheel.

I’ve had to repair the Deere a lot. I have suffered repeatedly. It has broken down in annoying and unexpected ways, it has done it repeatedly, and working on it is on par with laboring in a salt mine. I want to let it go.

UPDATE

I made a deal on the “new” mower, and it’s in my driveway. It’s a used Kubota ZD326S with a nice diesel engine and a 60″ deck. A zero-turn. As my buddy Mike says, a MOWER, not a TRACTOR.

The ad said 229 hours at a very low price, so I got excited. I went out to see the seller today, and of course, when I ran the engine, the hour meter did not move. And while the mower looked very good, it was pretty clearly not a 229-hour mower. The seat had some wear, the seat belts were somewhat bleached, and so on.

The seller was a very nice guy. He said the mower had belonged to his wife’s grandfather, who had died not long ago. He said grandpa used it to mow a couple of acres at his home.

He kept telling me he didn’t know much about the mower, so I looked it over fairly well. I had him jack up the deck, I looked in the hatches, and I had him to through all the functions with the engine running. It sounded perfect, and nothing exploded.

He had just put new tires on the mower, plus fluids and deck belts, so he wasted a lot of money before deciding to sell it. The tires cost over $300 for a pair. Insane.

He said he didn’t know anything about the hours. Judging by my own Kubota tractor, which I bought at 1100 hours, I would say the mower is between 500 and 1000, so it should have another 2000 in it, given good care. If anything goes seriously wrong when it gets old, it’s not a complex machine, so most things that are likely to go bad can be fixed.

It was lacking two front scalping wheels, along with the little shafts that hold them. I can get the parts for $210. He says the dealer told him he didn’t need them.

When he jacked the mower up in his driveway, oil dripped from the bottom of the crankcase, and I thought it was time for me to go home. It turned out he had overfilled it and forgotten to clean it off, so when he jacked it, oil ran off the top of the engine. This explained why it ran for several minutes with no drips before the front end was raised.

The underside of the deck looked very good. Still some traces of paint.

He spontaneously offered to knock a grand off the price, and I decided to take it. I got it for around $3000 less than the market price for a mower with a working hour meter and documentation, so unless something is horribly wrong with it, I can’t get burned. I really need a good mower that will last decades, I have been looking for months, and this was no time to let the perfect be the enemy of the very good. Mowing season is here, and I can’t face another session with the John Deere.

If this mower could be had new, it would cost about $18,000. A new really good gas mower like a Scag Tiger Cat II would cost $13,000 or so, the motor would probably fail by 750 hours, it would have to be refilled very often, and I would have to deal with the pitfalls of ethanol.

My best guess is that this thing is a peach, well worth sprucing up. There are a couple of dinged-up parts I can replace. I can touch up the paint here and there.

Because it was raining today, I was not able to run the mower much. I mowed a few yards and then put it out of the rain. I was flabbergasted. The old JD has a 20-horsepower engine, and the Kubota is rated at 25, but it feels more like 20 and 40. The engine ran perfectly smoothly, unlike the Deere’s Yanmar, which shakes the tractor. It seemed to run at a much higher speed. When I cut grass, it blasted out the chute in a shower of startled clippings. The cut it left was flat and smooth, unlike the Deere’s wake of ridges and lumps.

I had thought my lawn’s irregular appearance was mostly due to the nature of the awful grass, but it looks like the mower was the problem. Maybe it was running too slowly to really KO the grass, and I need to take better care of the air filter, or maybe the JD just doesn’t turn its spindles as fast as a Kubota.

Grok thinks the Kubota’s blades turn faster, but it isn’t sure.

The Kubota did all this while moving much faster than the Deere. I should be able to halve my time in the roasting sun.

I’m going to get a set of mulching blades and close off the Kubota’s chute to see if I get respectable leaf-pulverization. If I do, I am set for life. Oak leaves are the bane of my existence.

Kubota makes a mulching kit for the ZD326, but it gets complaints. It isolates each blade in a separate compartment, and this confines the clippings a little too well and makes the mower bog down in heavy grass. I was hoping to get a kit and modify it to make it breathe a little better, but when I looked under the mower today, it looked like it was already set up the way I wanted it. It had curved steel panels that surrounded but didn’t completely isolate the blades. That might work.

I’m getting Gator G6 mulching blades for it and hoping for the best.

If it’s reasonably dry tomorrow, I’ll take the Kubota out for a spin and see how she does. As long as it does what it did today, I will consider myself a satisfied customer.

I have felt wonderful ever since I got the mower home. Relaxed, knowing my old mower will no longer be a source of uncertainty and torment.

Sometimes I wonder if I spend too much, and other times I wonder if God thinks there is something wrong with me for not spending more of what he has given me to improve our lives. The John Deere was a bargain, and it functioned, but it also made me suffer over and over with breakdowns and repairs and maintenance that were extremely unpleasant. Maybe I should have bought a Kubota 5 years ago.

I discussed it with my wife. She thinks I should spend to make things easy for myself. I told her to remember she said that if she ended up getting a job at 60, but she said that would never happen, because God always provided for us.

I think I was pretty frugal, buying a used diesel. I couldn’t touch a new one without coming close to $20,000. Home Depot’s best mower is a gas Cub Cadet that costs $3,000 more than I paid and has a cheesy Kohler engine. Not even a Honda. Its deck is 10 gauge. Mine is 7 gauge. The John Deere’s looks like 10, gauge for that matter. The Cub Cadet is likely to be scrap at 1,000 hours, but I’ll have at least that many more to go.

I love diesels. I wish everything had a diesel engine.

For the first time in maybe 5 years, I am looking forward to mowing the yard.

Pinch Yourself

I belong to a shooting forum, and understandably, there are a lot of conservatives there. Conservatism is the dominant culture on the forum.

Yesterday, I saw something there that reminded me that antisemitism is a supernatural, not political, disease. Conservatism doesn’t prevent it. Only the Holy Spirit prevents it. Antisemitism is the preferred stance of the left, to the extent that leftists nearly own it, but there are also a fair number of nutjobs on the right who have it in for the Jews.

Here is what someone on the forum posted:

It’s a great deal like the Nazi propaganda posters of the last century; here’s one telling people to vote for Nazism:

This person considers himself conservative, so he’s not an Antifa terrorist or other type of leftist kook who happens to love guns.

On a side note, one of the sad things about belonging to gun forums is that in addition to people who love hunting, enjoy firearms and shooting, care about their civil rights, and want information on self-defense, there are always a fair number of dangerous, hateful idiots who look forward to the day they get to shoot someone. Gun forums are packed with rude, conceited, hostile people, just like fishing forums, Christian forums, leftist forums, food forums, and fitness forums.

I don’t know why fitness and bodybuilding (different things) people are so obnoxious and arrogant. Wow, you’ve been exercising and dieting for a while, and maybe drugs have made you look like a comic book character. That’s wonderful. See if you still feel superior in 5 years when you’ve quit going to the gym, your doctor has scared you off the drugs, and Reese’s cups are back on the menu.

The condition of your body has no bearing on the respect or disrespect other people should give you. If you’re in great physical shape, good for you, but I don’t respect you for it, especially if you’re malicious and you have so little self-awareness you think people should admire you for something trivial,self-serving, and fleeting.

Leftists are openly calling for wiping out all Jews in Israel. That’s what the “river to the sea” chant means. Many of them are rooting for Iran in comments on videos. And we all know about Queers for Palestine, which is sort of comparable to Antifa Rioters for Pepper Balls. Conservatives generally support Israel, and we don’t do antisemitic marches, rallies, or riots. But then there are the freaks who think Hitler was conservative and Nazism didn’t get a fair chance.

Sadly, the baboon who made this meme has tried to claim all right-thinking conservatives as his allies. He has used the revered “Chad” cartoon to voice his Satanic view, suggesting the rest of us agree.

In the thread where this meme was posted, this idiot or some other like “mind” claimed Jews wanted to run the world and so on. That canard is one of the most obvious proofs that demons cause antisemitism and that it’s a form of insanity.

Let’s recap. Let’s start with the premise that Jews are immensely powerful as a people and the rest of us are their puppets. Okay, they’ve had around 4,000 years to run their global empire. During that time, they had no homeland for 2,000 years because they were forced out by weak, inferior gentiles. They were abused and tormented by many of the countries where they sought shelter. During the last century, around a third of them were murdered by gentiles. They were so widely persecuted, the rest of the world had to give them a homeland in order to prevent them from being annihilated, and they got a tiny sliver of then-worthless desert with no oil, surrounded by hostile Muslims who attempted to exterminate them as soon as they could. The Muslims got a huge chunk of the world’s oil reserves, so they have lots of money to fund antisemitic genocide. Which they have never stopped doing.

If the Jews are running the world for their own benefit, they’re doing a very poor job. They have made some very bad choices.

Me, I would take Europe. Hands down. America is nice, but the climate is terrible over most of the country, and we can’t match Europe’s natural beauty. I would also take as much of the world’s oil as possible, along with a big fraction of the best farmland. I wouldn’t have let gentiles have atomic weapons. That’s for sure. I’d corner the market on those. And I’d own all the stuff Musk and Bezos have.

I might also take over some pleasant vacation spots in the tropics.

I would definitely impoverish the Muslims.

Jews haven’t done any of this, so how can they be running the world?

Antisemitism keeps getting worse. If it’s this bad now, I have to wonder what next year will be like.

The Best Gift Came Months Ago

This is my first Father’s Day as a father.

Why do they call it “Father’s Day”? That always bugs me. Like there is just one father. It should be “Fathers’ Day.” Oh, well.

Now that I am on the other side of the holiday, I think it’s strange that we honor men because God has blessed them. You would think the blessing was honor enough.

My son adores me. When I enter a room, his whole face lights up. The other day I walked by him without saying anything, thinking he was occupied, and he started to cry. When I rub his chest, he grabs my hand and presses it to him tightly while chewing on it and growling with passion. He screams with joy when I play with him.

He’s handsome. He has a very sweet nature. He’s more fun than I can describe. It looks like he’s going to be smart. He behaves well for a baby. But somehow people should treat me like I’m a hero because God gave him to me after I wasted most of my life?

It’s extremely important to honor fathers. I know that. But it should be an everyday thing. If my son honors me throughout the year, Father’s Day will be just another day. We should honor God every day for giving us children.

The Bible makes it clear that a child is a blessing. Consider Abraham, Sara, Rachel, Hannah, and the Shunammite woman. Psalm 127 says, “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.”

In Genesis, God told Abraham and Hagar he would make their sons great nations. These were blessings.

It’s nice to be appreciated, but I already felt blessed.

I was going to put up a photo of my son climbing over his mom to give me a big sloppy smile, but I have decided against it.

No Kings, but Plenty of Jokers

The children of the Antichrist have come to my red Christian area, hoping to drum up support for the wholesale violation of our immigration laws. In reality, they will just push Democrats into the Trump camp.

The “No Kings” anarchists claim they will be in the town square until noon. They were supposed to start at 10:30. I’m sure they will be annoying, because that’s their stated goal and their nature, but I doubt there will be significant lawbreaking, because they will be few in number, and our governor and our sheriff are not on the side of rioters. The police here are itching to make arrests, and the politicians are not going to discourage them. Here is Sheriff Wayne Ivey to tell you more:

He could be considered the father of the No Jokers movement.

They probably bused in a large percentage of whoever is out there right now trying to intimidate us. I doubt they have the resources to bring in enough criminals to overwhelm the state, county, and city police. The Soros machine has a lot of money, but it has spread itself out over a very large area today. The entire continental US, to be specific. I doubt they will be able to get much done here, in terms of the usual domestic terrorism they are known for.

As the anti-Newsom, and by that I mean as the incredibly competent, proactive governor he is, DeSantis has probably made all sorts of preparations. I would guess the National Guard has been told to get ready to deploy in a hurry.

The preparations DeSantis made for last year’s hurricanes were so good and so smart, I was shocked. You would have to live here to understand. Acres of response machinery, all over the state, waiting to be unleashed. In a state that has a budget surplus, I might add.

Democrats think money fixes everything, but the more you give them, the worse their states perform.

It’s sad to see these paid propagandists pollute my county with their presence, but I am extremely grateful for politicians and cops who are forcing them to bend the knee and obey the law. I would hate to be in a blue city right now.

Well. When would I not?

Associated Press Openly Advises Terrorists on Defeating the Cops

A Florida sheriff has made the news by stating that his department plans to enforce the law. Leftists are outraged. Predictably.

If you haven’t seen the video yet, you will. Wayne Ivey is the sheriff of Brevard County, which is where Cape Canaveral is located. He has caused leftist skulls to pop by going on TV and warning potential rioters about the likely consequences of committing crime in his county. First, he said his department welcomed peaceful protests. Then he said cops would hit back, and he said that if they put officers’ lives or bodies in serious danger, they would be killed “graveyard dead.”

Of course, leftists are saying he threatened to kill people for protesting. The people he explicitly welcomed. A lot of misspelled Internet comments are foaming over with words like “fascism” and “murder.” Internet lawyers who haven’t completed their GED’s are saying Sheriff Ivey should be put in prison for threatening to murder people, and they are claiming that if the police kill anyone in Brevard, his press conference appearance will prove he is guilty of murder.

As always, leftists are cribbing from their father, Satan. The father of every leftist. Satan and his imps want us to think God is unfair for condemning them forever while giving human sinners eternal life in paradise. They love playing victim. Similarly, all the leftist creeps who have been salivating over the prospect of rioting in Florida are now portraying our sheriffs as bullies so they can say that whatever crimes they commit in retaliation are justified.

In a move reminiscent of Kristallnacht, leftists are planning 1800 protests for tomorrow, as part of the 50501 movement. That number means “50 protests, 50 states, 1 movement.” This organization claims to be a genuine grassroots operation, but there is no way that can be true. It started with a Reddit post in January, and organized protests were underway in less than a month. And we have all see the semi trucks dropping off supplies for rioters. Someone is paying for all that.

Prior to Sheriff Ivey’s conference, in which he was surrounded by other law enforcement professionals in agreement, spindly-limbed black-clad putative males who had been busy filling backpacks with weapons were in a position cowards like to occupy: they expected little resistance. Now he has struck fear into their hearts, ruining the fun. Naturally, they’re upset. Each one of them is like a bride who just found out her caterer’s truck lost a wheel on the way to the banquet hall.

I was heartened to see Sheriff Ivey speak his intentions. I’m very tired of having the government hold me down so my enemies can punch me. It’s very heartening to see officials in one state standing up for the innocent against sadistic bullies.

My sheriff is just like Ivey. It comforts me to know that someone in power is willing to work to force malefactors to leave my family alone.

Tomorrow’s planned riots have a collective name: “No Kings.” The idea is that no one should have the kind of power Donald Trump had. Mind you, these are the same lily-livered characters who were so afraid of coronavirus, they stood up for Gretchen Whitmer when she had people arrested for not wearing ineffective masks while mowing their yards.

They didn’t seem upset when Obama went crazy appointing unelected “czars,” and they didn’t mind Andrew Cuomo forcing old people into nursing homes so they could infect each other with covid. They didn’t complain when the IRS tried to hire 89,000 new agents or when it started providing them with guns. It didn’t bother them when Mark Zuckerberg and Google censored half of the country, but they were infuriated when Elon Musk gave our voices back.

They were thrilled when Biden and governors tried to force all of us to take shots that were unnecessary and even deadly. Shots the manufacturers themselves admit were not properly tested.

They’re just fine with fascists, as long as they’re leftist fascists.

It’s a shame so many people think “fascist” is a term that only applies to the right wing. Not true. It’s a very neutral term that can be applied to Stalin just as easily as Mussolini. Look it up. Rioters don’t read dictionaries. These are the people who will loot every sneaker store, Best Buy, liquor store, and Apple bar in a city and leave every bookstore untouched.

Ivey is right to threaten to kill violent rioters who endanger others. This is exactly what the law calls for, and people planning to hurt the innocent need to be put in fear.

He also pointed out that blocking traffic is not peaceful, meaning it’s not Constitutionally protected expression. He said people who tried to swarm cars were likely to be run over, as they should be. Ron DeSantis agrees. It is the state’s official policy not to prosecute innocent drivers who drive through mobs that surround their cars and put them in fear.

This shouldn’t surprise anyone. It is consistent with self-defense common law going back to ancient England. If someone puts you in fear of serious injury or death, you can respond with deadly force, and having a crowd of worthless people hammer on your windows and prevent you from leaving certainly qualifies as putting you in fear.

In Florida, carjackers can be shot dead without consequences, as can arsonists and kidnappers. That has been the law for years. If one person trying to enter your car unlawfully is carjacking and kidnapping, you surely have the right to use your car to flee when two hundred people surround your car.

Unfortunately, the press is doing its best to demonize decent people and praise 50501. The shamefully-biased Associated Press calls 50501 a “grassroots movement” of “everyday people.” Those are the phrases it uses. Only the wicked would fight a grassroots movement and fight back against everyday people!

Rioters aren’t “everyday people.” In fact, “everyday person” has no definition. It must be one of those new terms leftists made up to distort reality. I guess it’s a contrived response, created and propagated via conspiracy, to the fact that conservatives have been exposing professional rioters. It must mean “ordinary local person not paid or trained to riot or bussed in by Alex Soros and Christine Walton, who just happened to show up at a riot with 500 other people at the same time, wearing the same face mask.”

AP is supposed to be an organization that reports only facts, but we all know better. It’s a disgrace to see them using “grassroots” and “everyday” just like the hordes of externally-coordinated leftist talking-points artists all over cable and the web.

If you’ve been reading my blog for years, you remember me correctly telling everyone that real blogging was dead. Corporations took over and produced sites like The Daily Kos and Pajamas Media that only pretended to be blogs. Well, now rioting has gone corporate. Same thing.

The Associated Press is now HELPING people riot and defeat the police. Check out this item from a “protest” checklist AP provided:

Face mask or bandanna, hat and sunglasses: Useful for helping to shield your eyes from pepper spray or tear gas, can also protect you from identification by law enforcement or online doxxing if that’s a concern.

Can you believe that? They’re telling people how to avoid identification by law enforcement. Here’s another:

Many organizations advise protesters to leave their phones at home to protect their privacy as they can easily be tracked. If you must take your phone, keep it turned off until you need it and, before you go, disable Face ID or fingerprint security and stick with the 6-digit passcode instead. You may also consider buying a cheap secondary phone to use.

I wonder why this isn’t a big story. It should be. One of our major news organizations–one which claims not to provide opinion pieces–has openly advised rioters in order to help them escape justice.

Ivey had to point some obvious things out. Burning cars isn’t peaceful. Blocking roads isn’t peaceful. It’s amazing that leftists need to be told these things. They seem to think that unless they’re shooting people in the face, everything they do is protected expression. Most of what we see them do these days is not protected by the Constitution, as well as illegal under federal and state laws.

What we now call “civil disobedience” has another name: crime. It’s also a tool for destroying democracy. We are supposed to use the polls to decide what happens here. Taking over buildings and blocking roads are not legitimate ways of agitating for policy change. If the democratically-elected government disagrees with you, it means you lost, fair and square, and you have a legal obligation to comply. You don’t have a God-given right to burn a store or throw pee at the police just because things didn’t go your way. You get one vote in the booth, not one in the booth and another one running up and down the aisles at Louis Vuitton with your arms full of stolen purses.

When crowds of semi-literate buffoons and enemy aliens get to run the country, democracy will be dead. Your vote will be worth as much as an Obama promise about your healthcare.

Civil disobedience has always been a stupid idea, except for cases in which the government is completely out of hand. Arresting illegal aliens in accordance with federal law does not meet that standard or come anywhere close to it.

For a long time, I have been predicting that idiot mobs would take over, using the web as their nervous system to help them gather and attack. I hope this weekend isn’t the time when it starts in earnest. Sooner or later, these morons will realize the police alone can’t handle them, and that will give them confidence to take over. When that happens, the only group large enough to take them on will be ordinary citizens with rifles. So civil war of a sort.

The black pajama kids, the enemy aliens, and the ghetto looters can handle the police, because they have overwhelming numbers. They will not be able to handle ordinary civilians. There are millions and millions of armed civilians in the US, many with police and military training, many with very sophisticated long-distance weapons, and they are not bound by the same rules of engagement the police follow. If the domestic terrorists get cocky and start playing guerrilla, they may die by the thousands before they realize their poor grasp of math and the law have made them fish in a very tight barrel.

They really need to go home and go back to civilized means of promoting their agendas before something terrible happens. They don’t understand whom they risk provoking. It’s appalling that leftist politicians, journalists, and entertainers are encouraging them to walk into a meat grinder. No one on the left has thought this through. They’re too busy virtue-signaling and committing shameful acts of racist and political sadism to think.

I am extremely grateful to live where I do. When the water starts to rise, it’s better to be on high ground than down in a swamp. Whatever happens, at least people in my area will get more time to deal with it, and this county will not be an early target because domestic terrorists, in addition to being stupid, are very lazy and always start their tantrums in their own cities.

Pairs Nicely with Word Salad

I guess it’s time for another “boiling frog” post. Once again, I am struck by mankind’s general failure to comprehend the level of evil in the world.

Man’s most impressive quality, to me, is our seemingly-unlimited ability to get used to things and be content with situations that are objectively very bad. There are happy quadruple amputees. There were surely moderately happy prisoners in the Nazi death camps. This is just how people are. As things get worse for us, many of us establish new baselines.

You start out thinking happiness is a huge income, a beautiful family, good health, and a fine house. If you go broke unexpectedly, it changes: happiness is a beautiful family and good health. If you get a horrible disease, happiness is a beautiful family. If things get bad enough, happiness is getting to trade the wet, soggy refrigerator box you sleep in, alone, while waiting to die, for a dry one.

There was a time not that long ago when women weren’t supposed to show their ankles in public. There was a time when a bikini was considered scandalous. Now you can walk around naked in major US cities, and the police will back you up.

“On a Slow Boat to China” was once considered too risque to be used in a movie, but now children repeat a song a famous and likely illiterate slut wrote about her vagina, and a public high school held an assembly to let an even worse slut speak. The latter slut can’t complain about being called a slut, because she appears in a video for a song called “Slut me Out.”

Your kids probably know it by heart.

We have also become used to childish pettiness and sadism, even from people in positions of great political power.

Los Angeles is being torn up by the usual suspects right now. Our federal government is obeying the law, rounding up and deporting illegal aliens, and Californians as well as hostile foreigners are rioting. They have tried to kill feds and random individuals by slinging concrete through car windows. They have burned cars. They entered a federal building and destroyed vehicles. What is the press calling this dangerous, ominous uprising? “Peaceful.” Even Fox said it.

What does “peaceful” mean now? How many car-burnings, attempted murders, and government-building invasions does a public gathering have to have before we admit it’s not peaceful?

The governor of California, a failed presidential candidate, and a US representative are blaming the victims. Imagine this happening in 1980 or 2000.

Gavin Newsom claims Donald Trump is at fault, saying he is intentionally fomenting disorder. Like a battered wife who burns her husband’s English muffin, I guess. Kamala Harris also blames the government, of which she nearly gained control. A representative named Norma Torres told the feds, “Go the F___ home!” on the Internet!

American law enforcement officers should “go home,” but hostile foreigners in the process of committing felonies in our country should stay here?

We should be astonished by the state of our country, but we’re not. We have escalation fatigue. We’re used to things being bad, and we’re used to them getting worse.

The icing on the cake is that Kamala Harris nearly won the presidency. It shows that America is in terrible shape. She is the dumbest, most transparently dishonest, least charming candidate the Democrats have fielded in my lifetime, and she nearly beat the man who gave us the glorious years of 2017 through 2021, during which our nation at least had the illusion of recovery.

Since Trump won, conservatives have been strutting around like Mick Jagger doing his chicken dance, proclaiming the end of leftism and the permanent ascendancy of the right, but the truth is, we are still losing. Trump squeaked by; there was no landslide. We have tiny, fragile margins in Congress. Americans are becoming more cruel and childish. Yeshua is becoming even less popular. The truth is held in even more contempt than it was in 2020.

Christians are being pushed into smaller and smaller safe zones. It seems like we are headed for a scenario in which we have no books to read, no shows and movies to watch, and no music to listen to, in addition to all our other limitations.

In 2021, I started watching the TV show Clarkson’s Farm, in which British comedian Jeremy Clarkson tries to make a profit running a thousand-acre crop and livestock operation. I mean he tries to make a profit other than the pallets of cash Amazon provides for his efforts.

It’s an extremely funny show, and I can relate to some of it, having worked on my grandfather’s farms and now living on a sort of farm of my own.

The other day, I was watching, and Clarkson called Yeshua “JFC,” and by that I mean he used a course term for copulation as thought it were God’s middle name. I was disturbed. My wife, who was walking through the living room holding our son, was disturbed, although she didn’t mention it until later.

I sat there thinking, “Should I turn this off, or should I just accept this as a momentary bit of unpleasantness of a sort which is unavoidable in the world in which I now live? Will I be held accountable?”

Clarkson is very smart and very funny, but he’s also one of Earth’s most conspicuous and perversely proud fools. He has no interest in God, and he doesn’t know he and his family are cursed because of his choices. He is not a good role model for people who want to lead blessed lives and avoid hell. People who are successful from the long perspective.

My wife brought the JFC outburst up last night, and we talked about it, wondering what we should do. It’s not just about Clarkson. It’s about the culture of the entire world. Are we supposed to remain enganged, let ourselves be subjected to commonplace filth and blasphemy, and get over it? Are we supposed to get rid of Starlink, hole up like lepers, and have groceries passed over our front gate?

This must be what Israel was like during the periods when the Jews served Baal and other evil spirits, or when the Tribe of Benjamin was busy raping men in the street.

People say lots of vile things these days, as a matter of course. They say “holy s___.” You probably say it. You definitely associate with people who do. Have you ever thought about what it means? You’re saying feces are like God. Do you think he likes that? Do you think it will never affect your future?

Nonetheless, it’s considered acceptable. I have probably heard it said 50,000 times, and I have probably said it myself, although maybe not, since it always sounded stupid to me. I’ve heard Christians say it.

I’m glad “oh, my f___ing God” isn’t as popular. That one always makes me cringe.

Last night I asked my wife where we were supposed to go once America became too disgusting for us. This was the big sanctuary country for Christians. The place where persecution was mildest. It’s crumbling fast, so where do we go? Africa? There is poverty and boredom, but least African countries fight perversion and put Yeshua in their constitutions.

I don’t want to move to Africa, but it would really be something, walking around and going about our business in a country where anyone who persecutes Christians or criticizes prayer gets ripped into by the general public. It would be fantastic to live in a country where a perversion parade would be grounds for mass arrests, and where witches, though common, have to hide.

When I prophesy, God keeps saying he is ridding me of the ways of Satan. That is excellent news, but when God clears you of the customs and beliefs of Satan’s world, you necessarily become increasingly disgusted with Earth and more aware of what mankind is missing by insisting on doing things its own way. No matter how nice your life is here, you feel a stronger drive to go home. You crave God’s presence. You want the tribulation to start so reform can begin.

The earth is a toilet that hasn’t been flushed in a very long time.

I love the county where I live. I love it 10 times as much as I hate Miami, which is saying a great deal. I wish the whole country were like this place. I love Tennessee. I love Singapore. I love Switzerland. Why? Because I love places where people at least superficially resemble Christians.

The Swiss are conceited leftists who have no interest in God, but they are polite, responsible, accomplished people who treat each other well and refrain from violent crime. The most popular religion in Singapore is Buddhism, which came from Satan, but again, the people act a lot like Christians. Tennessee is full of actual Christians. Parts of it, anyway. Definitely not Memphis.

My feelings about these places stem from my desire to get away from America’s deteriorating ghetto/junior high culture. I want to live in a place of peace and prosperity, where people aren’t constantly putting their filthy ways before my face.

Even though I know Singapore and Switzerland aren’t Christian countries, I can’t help loving them irrationally, just because of their peoples’ outward resemblance to Christians.

I don’t know what kinds of adjustments we will have to make regarding things we expose our family to, but whatever they are, our resulting situation will not be an adequate substitute for the Messianic Age or heaven. In order to come as close as possible to feeling as though we have been moved to a better place, I think the best thing we can do is to soak in God’s presence as much as we can while we are stuck here among the children and savages.

Like UV Light on a Hotel Bedspread

Sometimes I find myself failing to pray as much as I want to, and it’s a big problem. Life stops running as smoothly as it should, and I miss God. I start to worry that I’m planting bad things in my future by failing to pray.

My son was a big distraction when he arrived. Constant demands were placed on my wife and me. She became absorbed with his care, and she often pulled me away from prayer. I have had to fight this ever since he was born.

Lately, things have gotten a lot better for me. I have been praying for God to give both of us grace to spend time with him so we won’t be destroyed. I ended up telling my wife I was done getting up in the morning and feeding our son, because that time was reserved for God. She stopped waking me up and asking me to feed him, and things have improved.

Unfortunately, there is a down side to spending time with the Holy Spirit. He makes you realize how filthy your world is.

I was praying in tongues earlier, and I kept thinking about the corruption of this world. Look what a bizarre situation I live in. I am surrounded by powerful sexual perverts. These people used to be a tiny fringe element.

Not only are they not ashamed (as they should be), they have parades during which they prance about completely naked, in front of kids. They get people fired from their jobs for refusing to endorse their disgusting ways. They make Internet videos in which they threaten to kill normal, decent people for trying to prevent them from exposing their genitals to women and little girls in private areas. The police don’t go after them.

Imagine if normal people were threatening to kill them.

Human beings who are sufficiently high-functioning to read and write, bathe and clothe themselves, and even, in some cases, to have jobs are telling us they belong to the opposite sex, or to nutty “genders” that weren’t invented until about 2022. “I am a tree-sexual.” “My gender is cat.” And mainstream leftists defend them!

When I was born, which wasn’t that long ago in man’s history, things were completely different. Sexual deviants were still being arrested. Better that than the scenario in which we now find ourselves.

People who openly worship Satan are now able to force us to let them lead prayers before government meetings. Satan! The greatest idiot and malefactor who has ever existed!

In the United States, which was once a Christian country, witches routinely gather to curse conservatives and Christians, and we can’t do anything about it.

Our last president invited illegal aliens to come in. Invited them! And half of the population thinks he was right!

As I prayed, I was lying in bed recovering from a man-made plague. Man-made! How could that happen? What species other than man could be stupid enough to give itself a plague?

Every year or so until I die, I can expect to get a disease that didn’t even exist until some fools in China created it. Say what you want about earlier generations; they weren’t dumb enough to make their own epidemics.

Entire sectors of humanity have been weaponized by Satan. They have become, literally, insane. Delusion is now mainstream.

This is especially true of mainstream American blacks. The things they believe are too ridiculous for farce. White people cause all of the world’s problems. There was no slavery until white people created it. Math is racist. Blacks can’t be racist, even if they hate whites openly. Absurdities.

Blacks started a movement to cripple law enforcement over a tiny number of illegitimate killings by police, but they ignored the fact that most murders are committed by blacks, and most of the victims are black.

After decades of idiotic affirmative action, which punished the innocent and rewarded people who caused their own problems, we are still being told that “reparations” have to be provided. You would think that receiving millions of jobs and college admissions other people earned would be considered reparations.

Hordes of confused, godless leftists in the US now feel entitled to physically abuse conservatives, whites, and Christians wherever they find us. A bunch of them just attacked a Christian gathering in Seattle, and the mayor blamed the Christians. Just like Nero.

America is no longer safe for Jews. Not just America, but long-established sanctuaries like New York City and our universities. A group of Jews were just set on fire by an illegal alien–a Muslim terrorist–on an American street.

Our leftists, including many Jews, are kissing up to Muslims and siding against Jews. Sexual deviants are loudly marching in solidarity with Muslims who murder homosexuals as a matter of course. Feminists are siding with Muslims whose religion supports wife-beating, the punishment of rape victims, and barring women from driving.

Anyone who tries to speak a word of helpful correction in this crazy world is punished and silenced. People are too proud to be helped.

Somehow I’m supposed to raise a son in this place. A place where every kid is supposed to have a smartphone, and they routinely send each other pornography they have made.

I can’t send him to school because schools are like pools of infected pus, waiting to fill him with the mental and spiritual diseases of our time. I can’t take him to church because churches persecute the Holy Spirit and fill people’s minds with trash. I can’t let him watch TV unless I want him to be lectured about the glories of homosexuality and socialism. I can’t take him to Disney World unless I want him to see perverted employees selling princess costumes to boys. The movies are out. Secular music is out. I’ll have to cut off most kids who want to be his friends.

What kind of world are we living in now?

If I send him to college, they’ll do their best to convince him Christianity is just a plagiarizing myth structure based on earlier religions. They’ll teach him to fornicate; with other men if possible. They’ll give him bad grades for telling the truth about socialism, slavery, racism, and perversion. I guess business is the only option for him. And he’ll have to operate his business in a very red area unless he wants trouble.

I really hate this place. I can’t say it enough. And when I consider what it should have been, it makes me feel worse. There shouldn’t be any countries; we should all be united as brothers and sisters with Yeshua as our king. There shouldn’t be diseases and wars. Even animals should get along with each other. We should have abundance. We shouldn’t have worries.

After Yeshua returns, the world is going to be like a big petting zoo. Animals won’t kill each other any more. It will be safe to put a baby down next to an asp. We will soak in God’s presence all the time. We will find joy in helping each other. That’s what the world was supposed to be like from the beginning, but instead we have Miley Cyrus and P Diddy. Harvey Weinstein and Lena Dunham. Kim Jong Un and Barack Obama. The Bidens and Kim Kardashian.

Sit down for a few minutes and make a serious effort to imagine a world of love and agreement. Then consider the world you live in.

The sooner the rapture comes, the happier I will be. I don’t know how people who are closer to God than I am stand this place. It’s bad enough for people like me.

The only answer is to go deeper into God’s presence. Turning back isn’t an option. There is nothing behind me I can go back to!

I can’t wait until this is over. This place needs to be incinerated and rebuilt from nothing.

Banning Real AR-15’s in Colorado is Working out Great

Published a day late.

Life has all sorts of filters in it, and the Holy Spirit is the best one. He lets useless people pass through and disappear, but he catches the ones who belong to him and keeps them in your life.

Yeshua told Peter Satan wanted to sift him. That’s filtration.

I started blogging in 2001, if memory serves. I got to know tons of people, and nearly all of them have disappeared from my life. I still hear from Baldilocks (Juliette Ochieng) from time to time, though. We are texting right now. Like me, she tries to get cleaned up and transformed by the Holy Spirit.

She sent a text saying, more or less, that it was a good thing that my son had parents who were full of the Holy Spirit. No doubt about that! It sounds like a compliment to my wife and me, but it’s really not. It’s praise to God. I replied and said it was a testimony against me that I was so useless at the age when most men have kids.

I wondered if this explained Abraham’s advanced age at the time Isaac was born. Abraham was a swell guy, but when he was young, he worshiped demons and fallen angels, just like everyone else in Ur.

Sometimes I get full of myself and laugh at people who seem to be behind me in the race. I am especially critical of people who are being destroyed by belief in the prosperity gospel. But I got caught up in it myself. I believed it even though it was facially absurd. I would not have been a good parent in 1987.

What will be more embarrassing if all my deeds are shown to humanity at the end of the world? Seeing me watching porn, or seeing me send money to Robert Tilton?

Definitely the latter.

Looks like Dad has covid. I woke up yesterday feeling like I had snored a lot and irritated my throat, but it went away. Later on, I got chills, and my nose started filling up. And I had one of the gross digestive covid symptoms.

Covid is like global warming. No matter what the symptom is, it fits.

I think I got the remedial steps in the right order: 1. prayer, and 2. ivermectin. And I shot some spray into one of my nostrils. One open nostril is all you need, and if you alternate nights, you can extend the time it takes for you to become addicted to the spray.

I woke up feeling nearly well, except for some crud in my throat. In fact, my nose dried up before I fell asleep. Both nostrils. That was shocking.

When I treated myself with prayer, I thought of famous people who had turned to solutions other than God. For example, Asa turned to Egypt for help before getting with the priests and prophets, and he and his country got some curses for it.

I thought of Paul.

We are taught to believe that apostles and disciples never made mistakes, with the obvious exception of Judas. That’s wrong, though. We know they sometimes argued with each other. The Holy Spirit tells everyone the same things, so if two Christians disagree, at least one of them is listening to a source other than God. Paul argued with Peter, and he had a big dust-up with Barnabas.

I think Paul made a number of mistakes. When he was in trouble in Jerusalem, he appealed to Caesar for help. As a result, he was whisked off to Rome and deprived of his liberty. I don’t think God was behind that. God showed Paul, Peter, and Silas that he was perfectly willing to work miracles to free them.

I have tried to form the habit of going to God before looking for secular help. I think it’s very important, and it’s a manifestation of faith and humility, which God likes.

In my chat with Juliette, I asked where the preachers were, who were supposed to teach us these things during the last century.

They were trying to make poor people feel guilty for not buying them nicer mansions and jets.

It is exciting that my son has two parents who know the Holy Spirit and who will not be completely useless to him. On the other hand, it would have been more exciting if I had been a fit parent a long time ago, my son were in his forties, and I were playing with my grandchildren.

Looking outside my own little bubble, I see Satan’s children are burning Jews again.

I read about the Egyptian illegal alien who made himself a flamethrower and used it on pro-Israel marchers in Colorado. I keep saying God has shown me that pogroms are coming back and that Jews will not be safe anywhere. Well, here they are. If setting Jews and their friends on fire on a street in the United States isn’t sufficient evidence, what is?

What are Jews making of this, I wonder?

Actually, I know. I can guess.

1. Some Jews who worship the government and think the Tanakh is fiction–the mainstream–are concerned about the future of their nation, and they are supporting Israel.

2. Others in that group are thinking they need to appease harder. And a lot of them are helping the antisemites and marching with them.

3. The Orthodox are trying to come up with explanations that don’t involve mistakes on their part, as though remaining dispersed in strange lands and having no prophets or miracles are evidence they are on the right track.

4. Jews who know their Messiah and the Holy Spirit are thinking, “Well, this is it. We knew this would happen. Time to get closer to God and our Holy-Spirit-led Christian brothers and sisters.”

A flamethrower! What a punch in the face for people who think the problem is over-hyped and soon to pass. What a punch in the face for Coloradans who are working to nullify the Second Amendment. As the flaming gasoline is flying through the air toward you, just call the police, and they’ll arrive by magic and turn it into confetti before it lands.

Far-left politically-fungible Jewish liberal actor Michael Rapaport seems to be waking up, probably too slowly. He now says “the cavalry” isn’t coming to save the Jews. Of course it isn’t. Not unless the cavalry is Christians who are determined to protect however many Jews they can. We won’t be enough.

In the past, Jews have not gotten along well with cavalry. Consider the Cossacks.

When the state turns against you, the cavalry becomes your enemy.

If I were a Jew with a family, I would be looking at homes in places like South Dakota and Tennessee. Places where it’s okay to be armed. So there are no kosher butchers in these places. So there are no shuls. Big deal. Start migrating, and the butchers and rabbis will follow.

How many rabbis were there in Manhattan and Brooklyn when Jews starting settling there? Didn’t stop anyone.

Eat salad for a while. Have frozen meat shipped in. I guarantee you, there are companies supplying Jews with kosher products via UPS.

I’ll bet Messianics are moving.

Actually, Jews should stop stalling and move to Israel. It DOES belong to them, after all, and we know that God wants them there. God doesn’t expect them to live among treacherous Gentiles forever. He didn’t give Isaac the Promised Land so he could move to Colorado and be attacked with a flamethrower. The diaspora is a curse. It’s not normal, and it’s not a blessing.