{"id":3082,"date":"2009-03-17T18:04:26","date_gmt":"2009-03-17T23:04:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/?p=3082"},"modified":"2009-03-17T18:04:26","modified_gmt":"2009-03-17T23:04:26","slug":"my-hot-new-czech-girlfriend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/?p=3082","title":{"rendered":"My Hot New Czech Girlfriend"},"content":{"rendered":"

Every Girl Loves Presents<\/em><\/p>\n

I think one of the most irritating things you can do to a gun-grabber is to tell him you named your gun. So I think I’m going to call the new Vz 58 “Ivanka.” It’s a nice Czech name, and it applies to a hot babe who takes no crap.<\/p>\n

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Also, “Vera” is already taken. First by A Man They Call Jayne, and then by Doc Russia.<\/a><\/p>\n

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It’s hard to think of a sexy Russian name for the Saiga. Russian girl names tend to sound like “Agripena” and “Ludmila.” I considered “Mariska,” but it’s more Hungarian than Russian.<\/p>\n

Ivanka has some new accessories on the way. I got her a cute new laser\/light mount, plus a nasty strobe to put on it. A reader told me about these things. Supposedly they make people nauseous, which is a good thing, when those people are in your house toting weapons. We shall see. I went Chinese again. My Chinese laser is gorgeous, so I figured they were also capable of making flashlights.<\/p>\n

The Saiga will have a laser on the side rail, plus a light under the barrel. The Vz 58 has limited (i.e. no) mounting options, so it will have the light and laser on the barrel, riding the same mount. If a criminal enters my home, it will be very hard to choose. I know one thing. The pistols will remain asnooze in their bags. Pistols are great, but long guns mean more shots on target, plus much greater capacity and stopping power.<\/p>\n

Okay, the shotgun does not have greater capacity. But it has a whole lot, and one shot on target ends the game.<\/p>\n

I think the Vz 58 was an excellent move. It’s like an M1 carbine that has taken tae kwon do. I got one magazine all loaded up with Wolf ammo, and I am itching to get to the range.<\/p>\n

With enough prayer and a lot of luck, I will be able to go to my grave without shooting either of these things anywhere except at the range. But you never know. I don’t plan to have wrecks, but I still have airbags.<\/p>\n

All I need now is a little bag for the Vz. I’ll keep it folded, right where I can get to it. At last, real home protection. Now I can go back to buying utterly frivolous guns that serve no purpose.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Every Girl Loves Presents I think one of the most irritating things you can do to a gun-grabber is to tell him you named your gun. So I think I’m going to call the new Vz 58 “Ivanka.” It’s a nice Czech name, and it applies to a hot babe who takes no crap. Also, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3082","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-guns-hunting-fishing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3082","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3082"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3082\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3082"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3082"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toolsofrenewal.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3082"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}