This May Sound Queer

February 15th, 2024

“They” is the New “Beta”

So the perversion tsunami that is drowning the world has hit close to home. My buddy Mike has a son who is about 32, and he has informed Mike that his pronouns are “he” and “they.”

I’ll call the son Buford. Buford is going to play music at some kind of event, and Buford told Mike his friend James (real name) will also be playing. James has an album coming out.

Mike has tried to explain James to me, but, possibly because I care so little about understanding and pretending to validate lunacy, I have not made a good effort to commit it all to memory. I seem to recall Mike saying James is not a full-throttle homosexual. I may be wrong, but I think James is like Schrodinger’s cat. Not sure of his sex or preference until sufficient observation has been done.

I think James is like Schrodinger’s particles because his nature literally does not exist until someone else observes it. It’s all performative, to use one of the left’s favorite words. Leftist grandstanders shape themselves to get approval, admiration, and lots of juicy, profitable pity from those around them.

In a phone call, Mike stepped on some landmine of manipulation or other. I think he slipped and called James “he,” but I’m not sure. Anyway, Buford flipped out and told Mike, who is an extremely self-sacrificing dad and supports him and his race-card-tossing wife at every turn, that he was being disrespectful. A long, unfruitful conversation ensued.

I don’t think Buford has treated Mike respectfully for a long time, but let’s ignore that.

I could not understand what was going on with Buford. Was he a sodomite? Was he straight? Was he just adopting a pronoun because all the cool kids had one?

Mike tried to clarify. Buford says other men are more masculine than he is, so I suppose that would be people like Mike Tyson and Phil Robertson. He sees himself as arty and not possessed of a highly masculine presence, but he is not collecting Ethel Merman LP’s or coaching wrestling for the wrong reasons. He is straight. Because there are men he feels are more masculine than he is, however, he has decided he needs a pronoun. Not a full set of retch-inducing custom pronouns. So far, it looks like it’s just “they.” Subtle, unprepossessing and tasteful, but it makes a quiet statement, and it goes with anything from skinny jeans to a little black dress.

So now you get pronouns for being gay, bisexual, and having other abhorrent sexual disorders, but you also get one simply for being a regular guy who doesn’t look like the WWE uses him to test new steroids. For being a beta.

The obvious question: if pronouns are for people who have been oppressed, what is a straight beta doing with one? Who is oppressing betas?

Okay, sure, being a beta may get your underpants pulled over your head a few times when you’re young, but no one calls you a pervert or sends you to a special camp for beta conversion therapy. Catholics never burned betas for being beta. Betas do all right. Nixon and Carter were betas. Obama is a beta. Bill Gates. Steve Jobs. Bezos. Jay Leno. I love and respect Rand Paul, but he’s beta all the way.

Here is my take: Buford is a heterosexual, and he sees perverts all around him claiming pronouns, lecturing and hectoring normal people, getting their way when they’re wrong, and being given things they don’t deserve. He sees them getting admiration and attention. His own wife is partly black, so she gets to play the race card. He’s jealous, so he wants a card of his own to play.

He feels left out.

I think he is also controlled by demons that warp his perception and tell him being emotional is better than being rational.

He has said some pretty nutty things. Back when BLM was burning cities, he said he was terrified because his wife could be dragged out of a car at any minute and beaten to death by police. He didn’t mean this could happen at a rally. He didn’t mean the cops were angry because of all the BLM stuff that was happening. He was talking about day-to-day life, as it existed before, during, and after BLM’s racist, terrorist riots. She goes to the grocery to buy non-GMO gay-friendly tofu, she starts to drive home, and the cops give her a pit maneuver followed by the Reginald Denny treatment.

Reginald Denny was white, she is partly black, and Denny’s assailants were all black, but you get the idea.

Call it the Yankel Rosenbaum treatment if you prefer.

I don’t believe Mike is taking the right approach by discussing this stuff with him at length, patiently. Mike thinks that if he flat-out says all this stuff is insane, which it is, he will lose his relationship with his son. I can’t relate. I would tell him exactly what I thought. I think treating his zany claims as though they were worthy of respect is enablement, plain and simple. I think Buford needs to see how sane, rational people react to patent lunacy.

If my wife woke up tomorrow and started telling me she was a chicken, because some wokiee nutjob had opened her eyes with leftist theory, I would tell her she had a major screw loose.

After we heard Mike’s story, I asked my wife if she thought we should be sterilized.

I was not completely serious.

I told her she needed to know that liberal educators had made America’s young extremely stupid. For decades, they have taught them that every opinion is valid. As a result, they seriously believe it is wrong to take a firm position on anything.

Let me clarify. It’s wrong to take a firm position on anything, unless it’s a baseless leftist position. THOSE are factual, and people who disagree are not merely indisputably wrong, but dangerous. Their opinions are violence.

Figure that out. Every opinion has to be taken seriously, unless it conflicts with what far-left mental cases say.

If I tell everyone I know that I’m a petunia, they are required to agree with me, and those who refuse to lie will have their social and financial opportunities cut to the bone. If I say a woman can’t have a penis, I’m the one who gets banished. I’m the one who is committing violence.

May God rapture us this very afternoon. This is too much.

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Dishing the Dersh

February 13th, 2024

Robert Hur; Defense Attorney and Prosecutor All in One

It amazes me how often Alan Dershowitz agrees with me.

Dershowitz is lauded as a true legal genius, if it’s possible for works of genius to exist in a field where true brilliance is unnecessary and not helpful. People talk about him as though he were the law’s Johnny von Neumann.

I didn’t say “Einstein,” because von Neumann was smarter than Einstein.

What about me? Well, I got a lot of B’s at my second-tier law school. A law school B is like an undergrad A, but still. I rarely visited the library. I did very little except right before exams. I drank a lot. I had a girlfriend. I was never invited to join the law review. I graduated cum laude, but that’s like being employee of the month at Arby’s. Summa is somewhat impressive, but magna and cum are not.

Graduate from college summa cum laude in physics, and you will really impress me. In law, all it means is that you’re pretty smart and you love to study. It also means you didn’t write anything in your exams that offended your deranged Stalinist professors, and it may also mean you’re black, Latin, or homosexual.

I don’t know if Dershowitz is an actual genius, but he’s very smart, and he’s fair. Functionally, fair people are more intelligent than unfair people, because unfair people reject things their reason tells them are true. Dershowitz is smart, and he knows more about law than I ever will. He’s like a student who never stopped cramming for the bar exam.

I mean a student who PASSED and never stopped cramming. Not someone who crams because they fail repeatedly. I know some of those.

Dershowitz just came out with criticism of the report special counsel Robert Hur just filed about Joe Biden’s criminal possession and distribution of multiple classified documents, which occurred over several decades and involved a dirty, messy garage which was open to his drug addict son, who is rumored to have had sex with a Chinese spy.

What does Dershowitz say? He says pretty much what I said. Basically, Dershowitz’s position is that Hur says Biden is guilty, but he refuses to prosecute anyway, and the reason is that he is afraid Biden will win a jury’s sympathy by selling himself as a well-intended elderly man with a bad memory.

Unlike me, Dershowitz goes on to talk about how improper this is. I don’t know a whole lot about criminal law. I do know that prosecutors and even police make unfair decisions every day, deciding whom to release and whom to nail to the wall, and courts have no problem with it even though it violates the Constitution’s Equal Protection Clause.

Prosecutorial discretion is a fact of life, and it will never go away, so I don’t think about it all that much. The justice system is not just. It never was. Like my dad said, its purpose is to end conflicts, not to bring justice. You say you got cheated in your divorce settlement? I believe you. That’s because the court’s real function was to put an end to your squabbling with your ex-wife. The judge probably made some effort to do the right thing, but maybe he didn’t. Tough. The best way to get justice is to avoid letting things make it to court.

“Trump’s case was worse! He did things Biden didn’t do!” Maybe, although it’s risky to say things like that without seeing all the evidence. Doesn’t matter ONE BIT. A felony is a felony. We don’t prosecute bad, bad felonies and leave bad felonies alone. Go commit a silly felony, like driving over 100 miles per hour in the wrong state, and see if the judge lets you go because it’s a bad felony but not a bad, bad felony.

If you’re guilty of one felony, no matter how little harm you’ve done, they’re supposed to indict, arrest, and prosecute you. You could go through all these things and then get a plea bargain and avoid a felony conviction if you pucker up and kiss whatever has to be kissed. You’re not supposed to get a lollipop and be sent home with a clean record, without even being booked. You should be indicted, arrested, and prosecuted. None of those things will happen to Biden, who unquestionably committed multiple serious felonies over decades.

“Your honor, my client murdered three children, but his cousin murdered three children and was also a habitual litterbug, so while I agree that the cousin should go to the death chamber, it’s clear that my client’s charges should be dismissed with prejudice.”

No.

Hur’s weird, shockingly honest reason for not prosecuting felon Joe Biden is that he’s afraid he’ll lose the case. Was he drunk when he wrote his report? What a great example of “I said the quiet part out loud.”

“I can’t indict, because I’m trying to get in bed with a sexy court reporter who voted for Biden.” “I can’t indict, because the other students in my hot yoga class will stop talking to me.” “I can’t indict because I like hanging out on Rehoboth Beach.” No difference. A prosecutor doesn’t let trivial personal interests deter him from doing what he swore to do.

It’s a shockingly stupid reason. He’s more worried about a tiny professional embarrassment than he is about prosecuting MULTIPLE FELONIES. Every prosecutor loses cases. Hur has lost many cases. It’s all in a day’s work. Imagine your doctor refusing to treat you because you might die.

Every day, prosecutors go easy on defendants they don’t think they can convict, but they’re not supposed to roll over and show their bellies PRIOR TO ARREST. They should indict anyway. If you think you’re likely to lose, you offer a plea after indictment. You don’t say, “I would rather see you get away with a crime than look bad in one of the thousands of cases I will handle during my life.”

Now people who are too stupid to understand the law are running around saying Trump is guilty but Biden isn’t. They’re saying Hur said Biden was not guilty. No; he said he was definitely guilty. He just decided not to do his job.

He thinks a jury will love cuddly, befuddled Uncle Joe. Hello? That’s what jury selection is for. Every competent lawyer strives to get the most biased jury conceivable without violating the law or the canons of ethics. Hur apparently knows he is incapable of making an effective attempt to get a good jury. Who admits that in a publicized report?

The best lawyers do not work for the government, unless you count a few scholarly judges who don’t represent anyone.

Once again, the gander gets sauce, but the goose gets a pat on the head and a juicy reprieve. Conservatives are blatantly abused and oppressed every day, by the government their confiscated tax dollars supports. And when civil war breaks out, leftists will say they have no idea what conservatives are mad about.

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Speak Ill of the Dead

February 12th, 2024

Comforting Lies Take People to Hell

So today my Uncle Bert is in hell, in all likelihood. His daughter texted me to tell me he had died. But I received a comforting message saying he kept his independence until a week and a half ago, and he was still able to play golf.

When people die in sin, we sit around and talk about how wonderful they were, no matter how rotten or annoying they actually were. We lionized Elvis Presley, who rolled off the toilet dead, obese and full of drugs plus a hard stool six inches in diameter, at the age of 42. We say he joined heaven’s band, along with Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin, who are actually in hell with him, screaming and crying in darkness.

Elvis was a hypocrite. As a mediocre singer who filled women with lust, he made gospel albums that made flighty girls sweat and pant, but if you go to Youtube right now, you can find video of him bragging to his sycophants about the oral sex he received from ladies he didn’t know very well. He died next to a toilet in a bathroom attached to a bedroom where his girlfriend was in the bed where they fornicated. If he’s not in hell, his salvation is an unlikely major triumph for Yeshua.

We like to sit around tables after people die, telling funny stories about them, even if we are pretty sure they’re in hell. Preachers who have no guts take money to stand beside freshly-dug holes, telling people they just met how much the deceased were loved.

I don’t believe in personal revisionist history. It does no one any good to tell pleasant lies about the dead. I believe we should speak ill of the dead, just as the Bible does, when it’s appropriate. The cultural practice of shaming those who speak ill of the dead comes from our pagan past, from morons who worshiped trees and rocks. It’s not a Christian tradition. Pagans were afraid the spirits of the dead would take offense and come after them.

Incredibly, the Jews are still concerned about their dealings with the dead. Most people don’t know this, but Jews pray for their dead, and they believe in reincarnation. They pray to the dead, just like Catholics. These pagan contaminations of doctrine are kept quiet, but they exist.

I speak ill of the dead all of the time, just as the Bible does. Cautionary tales shouldn’t go to waste.

Today I started talking about the horrible things my family members had done, and my wife got a little tired of it, but I reminded her of this: if we forget these things, our children will relive them. Then she understood.

Bert married my dad’s older sister, Ardell. Far as I can tell, she was a psychopath. My dad had a little of that, too, and in my opinion, my sister is a complete psychopath. It’s a condition that involves arrogance, total selfishness, dishonesty, an inability to feel shame, and the destruction of other people for selfish ends as well as sadistic pleasure.

Ardell was very overweight, and when she met Bert, she had a daughter from a man she had divorced. Bert had 4 kids, I believe. I am not close to my dad’s side of the family, but I have counted them up, and I’m nearly certain there were 4. One died when I was in my twenties, and I didn’t send a card, make any calls, or go to a funeral.

Bert was a Mormon, but he was also an atheist, which is less crazy than being a Mormon. Ardell was also an atheist.

My dad’s mother was kind of an empty skin. I have no idea what she believed, but I doubt she ever had a spiritual thought in her life. She had no impact on my life. Didn’t send Christmas or birthday presents. Never called. Didn’t help my mother after my sister and I were born. Lived in an apartment conspicuously free of books. She took her kids to the Presbyterian church when they were young, but it didn’t stick. It may have been my grandfather who took them. He was a politician. He died during World War Two, from drinking poisonous moonshine. He was an alcoholic who beat my grandmother in public.

I didn’t really know my cousins. My dad had another sister, and she had two kids. One died at 18. I didn’t send a card, call, or go to the funeral. I don’t know the other one. I knew the parents a little. My Uncle Johnny called me out of the blue from a nursing home last year.

I have opinions. My opinion is that Bert wanted a maid and Ardell wanted any kind of husband. I don’t recall any evidence that they felt affection for each other.

Ardell used to beat Bert’s youngest child, whom I will call Mary, since she is still alive. I barely know her, but I know we hit it off on the few occasions when we saw each other. She was very kind and gentle. Lacking affection for her stepdaughter, Ardell tormented her. She used to give her own daughter candy and let her eat it in front of Mary. When Mary and the other daughter slept in the same bed, Ardell would rest her weight on Mary while leaning across the bed to kiss her own daughter good night.

Bert and Ardell made their kids take jobs. The kids looked after the house. They worked and bought their own clothes. They resented Bert and Ardell, for good reason. Kids should do chores, but they’re not mules.

Bert liked to travel and fish, and he bought an RV. He and Ardell traveled all over the US. One of his sons became an airline pilot, so Bert and Ardell got cheap flights, and they made the most of it. Travel, fishing, and golf seemed to be their reasons for living, and my impression is that Ardell was much less excited about these things than Bert, but as an obese, hard-voiced, mannish woman with kids and a not-winning personality, she didn’t rock the boat.

When I was young, I liked Bert well enough, mostly because he was nicer than Ardell, which is saying little. As I grew older, he wore on me. I can tell stories.

My dad took them to the Bahamas on his boat. I took two adult friends with me. On big boats, everyone helps clean up and keep things orderly. Even guests. When we would dock the boat, Bert would put a chair on the dock, crack open a Coors Light, which he called “Silver Bullets,” and watch the rest of us work. Once he told me we had missed a spot, and I yelled, “WE’RE SHORTHANDED.”

Bert and Ardell came to visit one Christmas, along with Johnny, his wife, and the daughter I didn’t know. We were going to fish on the boat and use my dad’s shared condo at Ocean Reef, a resort for the wealthy. Bert would get to fish AND play golf for nothing. Score!

Bert didn’t tell us he had norovirus. Not until people started getting sick.

I moved onto the boat, abandoning my stranger-relatives, whom I didn’t really want to get to know better. Everyone started throwing up and running for the toilet every half an hour. I eventually got sick, too, because Bert didn’t tell us he was sick until I had been exposed.

Norovirus is only spread through feces, so Bert had been putting his hands in communal dishes without washing them properly, while sick with norovirus.

I could tell my cousin was offended when I went to the boat. My mother thought I was rude. I didn’t care. I didn’t know these people. What did I care about their feelings? They were going to disappear after Christmas. That actually happened. I didn’t see my cousin again for about 25 years. If she thought I was a jerk, it didn’t impact my life. I’ll never see her again.

My mother was the only one who didn’t get sick. I have no idea how she avoided it.

That’s one Bert story.

On another occasion, my dad took Bert and Ardell to the Bahamas on the boat. On the return trip, the water was very rough. Ten-foot seas. My mother and I tried to get my dad to wait, but he was a poor seaman, and he mistakenly thought his boat was big enough for any kind of sea.

Before we passed Spanish Wells, a whites-only island in the Bahamas, things started flying around inside the boat. Ardell, knowing very little about seamanship, started climbing the ladder to the flybridge so she could see what was happening.

The boat jerked, and she lost her grip on the ladder, falling into the flybridge awning. Her left hand caught on something, and he wedding ring was yanked severely by the momentum of her 250 pounds. The skin ripped open, leaving a wound that needed stitching.

We persuaded my dad to take us to Spanish Wells, where there was presumably a nurse with a needle and sutures. Ardell sat in the boat’s saloon, holding a bloody paper towel on her hand. She and Bert were under 10 feet from the fridge.

Bert said, “Honey, get me one of those Silver Bullets.” And Ardell staggered to the fridge and got him one.

Ardell became demented and died in 2014, and my dad insisted I go with him to Tennessee for the funeral. He was still practicing law, but I think he knew he was having mental issues. Also, although he had destroyed our family and had poor relations with his own, he occasionally pushed my mother, sister, and me to put on an act simulating a wonderful warm family, the product of a thoughtful and generous patriarch.

While we were in Tennessee, a bunch of us sat down in Bert’s den, and we all talked. Mary had a brother who had strayed from Mormonism, and she had convinced him to come back into the fold. She knelt by his chair and talked softly to him about Joseph Smith’s Satanic con. She really believes that stuff.

I heard her mention Lamanites. This is not a type of flooring or siding. A Lamanite is an American Indian. They come from Asia. Mormons think they are Jews, somehow transported here from Israel. How obvious is it that this is a fantasy? Do I have to even mention the fact that DNA tests prove it isn’t true? It’s like trying to debunk the tooth fairy. I would feel foolish.

Mary is warm and caring. Probably the finest first cousin I have, although I could be wrong, because I have at least 4 I don’t really know. It is tragic, but she has become some kind of Mormon teacher. She told me many women rely on her for spiritual guidance. These poor people are striving daily to push further into Satan’s trap.

Mary was abused by a gutless, selfish little boy of a father, and she was abused by a psychopatic stepmother, and now Satan is taking her to hell and using her to lead others there. An eternity of abuse is coming.

I could sit here all day and write about the reasons why Mormonism doesn’t work. I could talk about how Smith was a known con artist before he became a guru. I could point out that his story about looking at golden plates in a hat can’t be true, because the plates would have weighed so much no hat could have held them. I could say the Book of Abraham is an Egyptian text about preparing dead bodies for entombment, which it is. Mormons wouldn’t listen, because they are supernaturally blinded. They think they’re right because they’re successful and don’t drink in front of other people.

I won’t be at Bert’s funeral. If I get notice of an address, I’ll send some flowers. Not expensive ones.

The stories the family told at Ardell’s funeral, at which no minister was present, were appalling. They told about how Bert and Ardell had had a fistfight, rolling on the ground outside the RV, over some trivial thing. They thought that was hilarious.

It’s normal to tell funny stories at funerals, but if Ardell had been there, she would have told stories that were more helpful. She would have told us about hell and her regrets. She would have sobbed and begged God to save her. She would have begged her kids for forgiveness. She would have warned the rest of us. Then she would have gone back to hell, because there is no help for the dead, regardless of the fables Catholics and Jews have taken from pagans and turned into doctrine.

I remember having long talks with Bert and Ardell about the reality of Yeshua. I got nowhere. These two hard-headed, conceited, mediocre people thought they already had the answers. I am so sick of beating my head against the rocks which are the heads of other human beings. I would love to be put together with a few people who will actually listen.

I’ll never see Bert or Ardell again, or their dead son, or my dad’s mother. All my involvement with them was a waste of time. Bert and Ardell sent my dad a framed picture of themselves. I’m going to throw it out and keep the frame. To my heart, it’s like those pictures of strangers that come with wallets. Other people who are not part of my future.

Speak ill of the dead. Offend. Seriously. It’s better than going to a long series of funerals at which people bury their heads as deeply in the earth as the remains of the recently damned.

The older I get, the more people I offend, the less I care, and the more good I do. I may have given Mary the URL for my blog. I don’t remember. If she reads this, so be it. Maybe it will help her.

My wife and I prayed for her this morning, and we will keep it up for a while. It would bring me tremendous joy to find out she had finally found freedom. I would really like her to be with us forever in the place where her parents can never go.

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President Faustus

February 9th, 2024

Thank Goodness Those Dementia Rumors Have Been Put to Rest

Am I the only one who is glad Joe Biden proved there is nothing wrong with his memory? What a relief.

What a week it has been. Biden claimed he met recently with Helmut Kohl and Francois Mitterand, two people who died before he became president. Then special counsel Hur, who was appointed to investigate his crimes, said Biden could not remember when he was vice president or when his beloved son died. He couldn’t even give a ballpark guess about the death of his son, who passed in 2015. Hur said Biden had committed felonies, but he chose not to prosecute because he was afraid it would be hard to convict a man who could use his advanced age and “poor memory” to charm a jury.

He said Biden committed crimes, and he started committing them when he was a senator, when he still had some idea who he was and what day it was. Biden carefully brags that the prosecutor chose not to charge him. He says that because he can’t say the prosecutor didn’t say he was guilty.

It’s a fascinating situation. Biden and Trump are accused of the same crimes, along with some obstructive efforts on Trump’s behalf, and Biden’s prosecutor says Biden is guilty. Biden and Trump are about the same age, but only Biden is accused of committing crimes when he was young and relatively sound of mind. The only reason Trump got worse treatment is that unlike Biden, he is NOT demented. Dementia, which Biden denies, is Biden’s successful defense.

Even better for Biden, this is an extraordinary defense, because the suspect doesn’t have to prove it. The prosecutor made the defense for him.

It’s not completely true that Trump was treated worse because his mind is sound. Trump also got worse treatment because the system is always unfair to him. If he were demented, he would still be facing charges. They would charge him if he were in a rest home, wearing diapers and wondering who his family members were.

People think “demented” is a word that only applies to individuals who are completely gone. Not true at all. It just means you have at least begun to have serious cognitive problems. The facts that Biden can still dress himself and cut his own meat (assuming these things are true) don’t mean he isn’t demented. Biden is no longer capable of leading the life of an employed individual in a position requiring responsibility and the mastery of a lot of facts. He is demented.

Bruce Willis continued making movies after he lost much of his mind. He was not completely helpless, but he was definitely demented.

When humble people become demented, they are more likely to perceive the problem and admit they have it. They make good patients. Arrogant people like Biden are different, probably because arrogance is a delusion one has to nurture. By the time an arrogant person starts to lose it, he or she has already spent decades lying to him- or herself. Such people depend on their inflated self-appraisals to protect them from scary feelings of inferiority, which, in the case of 11th-percentile law school graduate Biden, are justified.

Arrogant dementia sufferers lash out at people who tell them the truth, because they see control and admiration slipping away from them. Biden is lashing out now. He lashed out at the prosecutor and the press. He asked how the prosecutor could “dare” ask him about his son, as though it were somehow outrageous to ask a parent a simple question about an adult son who died over 8 years ago.

Arrogant people are irrational and dishonest. You can’t be arrogant and truthful. Biden is used to lying and bullying people who tell him the truth about himself. These are habits, and habits are the last things to go when dementia sets in.

I love my late father, but he was arrogant, too. He could not make himself admit he had dementia. When he quit practicing law, he made it sound like he had made a decision to relax and enjoy life, but the truth is that he was no longer capable of the job. A big client dropped him, and I think his dementia was the reason.

I’ve seen Biden’s problem up close, so I know a little bit.

My dad lost the ability to find his way around in a car. He lost his ability to keep up with his affairs. He didn’t lose the bad habits of pride and denial until close to the end. Biden will go out the same way, but because he is far more arrogant and much less intelligent than my dad was, he will probably never admit he has a problem.

While he was angrily slandering people who told the truth about him, trying to refute Hur’s claims, Biden claimed Egypt’s president actually ran Mexico. He said he had been busy trying to get the president of Mexico to let aid into Gaza.

I get it. Egypt is to the south of Gaza, and these countries share a border. Mexico is south of the US, and we share a border. Egypt and Mexico are backward, corrupt countries whose leaders have to be humored and cajoled in order to get them to do the right things. But they’re in different hemispheres. For a demented person, they would be easy to conflate. Gaza isn’t America, and no one with a functioning mind could confuse them.

It’s really disgusting to see Jill Biden take up for him. She claims she knows better than we do, because she is with him all the time, witnessing his amazing state of dynamic non-dementia.

What a liar. This is the same person we see on video, giving him answers to questions and helping him find his way off stages. No one has ever had to lead Donald Trump or even Mitch McConnell, who is also demented, off a stage.

I think Jackie Kennedy ruined first ladies. She was a somewhat loose woman descended from a true, non-Irish, upper-crust family. She wore Chanel. She was thin. She looked pretty as long as the camera was not very close or focused too tightly. She was a socialite. America fawned on her. I think she gave the position of first lady a type of glamour it had never possessed before. No one got excited about what Mamie Eisenhower, Bess Truman, or Eleanor Roosevelt wore.

I suspect that Jill Biden is in love with her position of unearned envy and admiration, and that she would say nearly anything to keep Joe in office, regardless of whether he were competent or even conscious.

She says she knows him better than we do. That’s true. That means she has been aware of his dementia longer. She knows what his doctors and handlers do to hide it. She knows about the hair transplants, fake teeth, and facelift. She should have been the first to oppose his 2020 run, but in order to do that, she would have had to care about America more than herself.

Now even leftist reporters are badgering Biden about his obvious senility. I guess a truth explosion is taking place. The new Biden revelations came out on a day other than Friday, so the lazy, lying press has to confront them.

What’s happening to Biden reminds me of the Dudley Moore movie, Bedazzled. Satan approaches a man and grants his wishes in exchange for his soul, but the man is not smart enough to make wishes Satan can’t twist, so Satan keeps his end of the deal while seeing to it the wishes become sources of misery, not pleasure. Biden’s pitiable drive to glorify himself as president and enrich his children has been fulfilled, but he got elected after he was senile, he and his living children are objects of global contempt and ridicule, his best adult child died young, and the two remaining children are drug and sex addicts, one of whom is likely to go to prison before the election, which Biden will lose because people generally think he’s a fool. That’s assuming he ends up on the ballot, which may not happen.

It’s remarkable that the report was released so early in the week. That is inconsistent with the Deep State’s long history of protecting leftist presidents. Standard practice is to drop bombs into the soft, deep, absorbent sand of Fridays, because journalists are extremely indolent and low in competence, and most don’t work weekends. Perhaps Hur is more concerned with his own reputation than Biden’s. After all, he will still have a career to worry about next year.

Is it possible he’s just being fair? I don’t know. He’s a Republican. If he’s being fair, why would he refuse to prosecute Biden, given that he concluded Biden is guilty? Maybe he’s right to think he will be hard to convict. So what? Shouldn’t he try? Where is the down side?

If the crime is so serious it warrants an expensive prosecution of one elderly man, why is the special counsel willing to fold without trying in a similar case with another elderly suspect?

Democrats are telling us Biden’s crimes are little, unimportant, excusable felonies, like Hillary Clinton’s, but Trump’s are big, important felonies that have to be addressed. Maybe Trump went further than Biden, but it’s the same basic crime, and Trump has mitigating factors Biden lacks.

So are we going to get President Kamala now? Terrifying. Kamala Harris is unintelligent and has no principles whatsoever. Biden is a little dim, but compared to Harris, he might as well be Socrates.

On the up side, Harris is terrified of taking responsibility, so if Biden is driven out, maybe she will be reluctant to do the extremely stupid things her ethos calls for. Her drive to avoid public mistakes is way more powerful than her drive to implement her agenda, if she has one or knows what one is. Presidentess Tee Ball will not swing for the bleachers.

What happens when a president is removed from office during an election year? That would be interesting. No time for other candidates to get in gear. Would they manage to prepare serious opposition to Harris, or would the machine wrap its wings around her and give her special snowflake protected status, as it has Biden? Would it continue keeping other candidates out of primaries?

This may turn out to be the weirdest election year in history. The system is not designed to react swiftly to situations like this.

One of the symptoms of the apocalypse is mass delusion, or what some would call mass psychosis. Huge swaths of the population now believe things that are patently insane. People elected a known dotard and a woman who is too dumb to be a public official. Now we will find out how deep the damage runs.

If it’s like this now, what will it be like in 6 months? I never get tired of asking that.

2 Comments »

The Meat of the Matter

February 8th, 2024

Seems Like no One Knows the Truth About Anything

I was praying with my wife yesterday morning, and I got off on the topic of the concealment of the truth. When I pray, I don’t just ask for stuff. I make statements. I was asking God to tell us what to do about something, which means I was asking to know the truth, and I started talking about the way the world now swims in lies.

One of the biggest areas of deception and concealment is that of coronavirus. We don’t know much of the truth at all.

1. Do the vaccines work? At first, people like Joe Biden and Rachel Maddow told us they were 100% effective. Then we heard figures like 90%. Then we heard that every person on Earth could expect to get infected, vaccinated or not. When the vaccines started looking bad, they told us that while they might not prevent infection, they would absolutely, definitely prevent every recipient from getting very sick and dying, and then they told us countless vaccinated people had died or at least become terribly ill.

2. Do the masks work? No; not at all. That’s what they said at first. Then they said they worked very well. Now they say this: no; not at all. Nearly.

3. Do vaccines hurt people? No; not at all. Almost never, they said. Then young people started dropping dead in such numbers it significantly affected official excess death figures. They said this had nothing to do with coronavirus vaccines. It had to be related to all those other giant health crises that occurred right after the end of 2019. A lot of journalists and officials still deny that vaccines do harm, but simultaneously, the CDC says this:

[E]vidence from multiple vaccine safety monitoring systems in the United States and around the globe supports a causal association between mRNA COVID-19 vaccines (i.e., Moderna or Pfizer-BioNTech) and myocarditis and pericarditis.

Oooooooookay.

The other day, I read that a vaccinated baby’s risk of heart problems from covid vaccination is about 2.2%. The risk of symptomatic coronavirus infection is almost too low to measure. It is essentially zero. But people gave their babies shots anyway.

A rate of 2.2% is not small. It’s astronomical. Imagine this: you see a table covered with hundred-dollar bills on a city street, and a sign over it says, “Over one in fifty people who take a hundred-dollar bill will get myocarditis.” Would you take the money? Would you drive if getting in your car carried a 2.2% chance of myocarditis?

People can be really stupid about probability. We tend to think a low risk is the same thing as complete safety.

How many babies have had mRNA shots? Let’s say it’s a million, which is not unreasonable and could be low. That’s 22,000 babies with heart problems.

How many babies have had serious problems with coronavirus? Virtually none. And doctors knew coronavirus was not a serious threat to babies before they shot a bunch of them full of experimental vaccines which HAVE given many of then heart problems.

Pretending the 22,000 figure is correct, did we kill or seriously harm 22,000 babies in order to save a couple of dozen freak babies who somehow managed to get severe covid?

Right now, leftists are busy trying to put out the sudden-death fire, and maybe they will succeed, because they distort and control information, just like their spiritual siblings in North Korea and China. When stories come out, they say dumb things like, “Anecdotal! Anecdotal!” Our knowledge of the plagues that ravaged Europe is mostly anecdotal. No one took statistics or set diagnostic standards. Was the plague imaginary?

Today, we have excess-death statistics compiled by scientists, and leftists are still saying evidence for vaccine-induced sudden deaths is anecdotal.

How do you make it NOT anecdotal? How do you prove myocarditis and pericarditis are NOT caused by covid? Is that even possible? Does the body of a 14-year-old killed by vaccine myocarditis look different from the body of one whose cardiac arrest was caused by some other problem? Journalists and people in the medical/pharmaceutical/government complex should tell us instead of presenting us with their self-serving conclusions.

What if 10 million people died from heart inflammation next month? Would they keep telling us not to connect the dots?

How do we know the risk to babies is 2.2%? That’s a hell of a question. Aren’t most cases undiagnosed? It’s pretty obvious that vaccine heart damage sometimes has no symptoms until victims drop dead. If it always came with symptoms, the deaths wouldn’t happen on basketball courts. They’d happen in hospitals, where victims would go after feeling ill.

There is no way we’re detecting all of them. What if the rate is 10%, and 2.2% represents the number we have proven to exist? I haven’t seen anyone address this, possibly because journalists are generally too stupid to deal with math and science.

Disease cases are like cockroaches. If you see one, there may be lots of others you can’t see.

When I brought up the concealment of the truth in prayer, I wasn’t thinking mainly about coronavirus. I was thinking about low-carb diets. I was asking God to tell us whether we should try them.

My wife got here two months ago, and we have been exploring American food opportunities pretty thoroughly. She is concerned about her weight, and I am not all that happy about mine. Somehow, I came across a video of Jordan Peterson telling the world he only ate beef.

I had no idea there was an all-meat diet. It sounds like a leftist caricature of the Atkins diet.

When I was a kid, a bunch of lobbyists created what we called the Food Pyramid. It told us what to eat. We were to eat a lot of the stuff on the bottom level, and progressively less as the levels got smaller.

Nobody told us food industry lobbyists shaped the pyramid, but it’s true. One would think doctors would have had a say, but our government listened to people who grew grain. As a result, with no evidence whatsoever, people in authority started telling us to pump ourselves up with grain, like beef cattle. And doctors went along with it, which is very weird.

They also told us to go easy on meat. I have no idea why, since meat also had lobbyists. I guess the grain lobbyists spent more money.

Doc Atkins popped up and told the world this was all wrong, and he was right. He said we needed to limit carbs and eat all the meat, eggs, and cheese we wanted.

He was called a quack, and the medical establishment reviled him. Darn those lobbyists.

He told us excess carbohydrates made us insulin resistant, so we craved carbs and stored fat. Other doctors hooted like contemptuous baboons.

Now, mainstream doctors tell us about the dangers of insulin resistance. But they still push carb-heavy diets. They love vegetarianism, a bizarre and unnatural practice that didn’t exist until relatively recently in man’s history.

Doctors still tell us fat is bad, even though the science that condemned it has been debunked or at least stripped of most of its luster.

Doctors literally told us how to get fat and die sooner, but they claimed they were really telling us how to get slim and healthy. Now we’re supposed to believe them when they can’t agree on their stories.

Jordan Peterson says he eats only beef. Not “meat.” Beef. That’s how far-out he is. He says he has gone from 212 pounds to 165. He says his eye floaters and gum problems vanished. He says his lifelong depression went away. He builds muscle easily. He says he sleeps better and thinks more clearly now.

Is it true? I think so. He looks like an obsessive runner, even though he isn’t. His skin looks great. His mind is sharp. He has no reason to lie. No one is paying him.

I listened to him, and I looked around the web. I started thinking my wife and I ought to go zero-carb for a few days to detox from all the pizza and cookies and bread we’ve been eating. I don’t think we should go carnivore, because even if it works, I am not willing to make the sacrifice.

When I was in law school, I went a very long time eating almost no carbs. I lost something like 25 pounds, eating as much as I wanted. I was strong. I maxed out most of the machines where I worked out. People said I would have no endurance, but I used to ride an exercise bike for 45 minutes with my heart rate at 168. I know low-carbing works for me, but I’m not going all the way. Sometimes I have to have a pizza.

Today I got up and ate 6 fried eggs with 6 slices of bacon and 3 slices of American cheese. I feel very, very good. I don’t know why, but when I skip carbs, I always feel peaceful.

I think I’ll go two more days, and then we may start eating meat and non-starchy vegetables 6 days per week, with a break on Saturday to keep us from going insane.

The annoying thing is that people are so dishonest and agenda-driven, I can’t get good information about low-carb diets. And oddly, the lines seem to be drawn between leftists, who reject God, and people who accept him. You don’t really see many left-wing low-carbers. In fact, it’s much more common to see leftists who are enraged by low-carbing. That’s bizarre, but it’s true.

There seems to be a connection between hatred of God and love of vegetarianism. Hitler was a vegetarian. A lot of really annoying godless Hollywood performers are vegetarians. PETA nuts hate Christianity, and look at their diets.

Abel pleased God. He raised and slaughtered sheep. He presented God with the blood of innocent creatures whose throats he had cut, and God was happy with him. Cain raised plants, and he had the gall to present God with produce. When God corrected him, instead of taking the hint, he murdered Abel, and he was cursed for it.

God has always been a proponent of killing animals and meat eating. He had Abraham cut animals up for the covenant of the pieces. He let Abraham cook a goat for him, and he ate it. He had Elijah set out a dead steer for him, and he sent fire to devour it. He forced the Jews to eat meat once a year on Passover. Vegetarianism was a sin to the Jews. He established a sacrificial system that essentially turned the temple into a barbecue factory.

If you could go back in time to the temple, the first thing you would notice would be the delicious smell of meat being roasted. It was there all the time, because sacrifices took place every day. A lot of sacrifices. Birds. Goats. Sheep. Cattle. The Bible says God loves the sweet smell of burning meat.

Jesus ate meat. He told his disciples to eat his flesh and drink his blood. He was called the lamb of God.

God told Peter to kill unclean animals and eat.

It’s pretty clear that God has no interest in veganism. God eats meat, and so should we.

I wish we lived in a world where people told the truth, so I could get good dietary advice everyone agrees on, but that is not possible. Human beings are too crooked. You can’t believe anything they say.

I don’t believe the people who say you should never eat plants, and I definitely don’t believe the creepy, self-righteous zealots who get angry at people who eat meat. I will continue eating meat, and I doubt I’ll ever go carnivore.

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Put not Your Trust in Princes, nor in the Son of Man, in Whom There is no Help

February 6th, 2024

Count on Being Let Down

I have gone to several events hosted by The Last Reformation, the organization headed by Danish evangelist Torben Sondergaard. They did a very good job. They baptized people. They healed people. They cast out demons. They didn’t beg for money or tell people what to do. They told people a lot of helpful things about God.

I have recommended TLR to people because TLR does a good job of the things I listed above. I have always told them TLR was not perfect. I told them it seemed to be headed in the direction of becoming a denomination. But it was still useful.

I just got a mass email from Torben, and it looks like the things I thought might happen have happened.

I know that there are too many lone rangers running around in our network or people who are claiming to be part of our network but are not. They have not always acted in a good and biblical way, and this has given TLR a bad reputation. I am sorry every time I hear bad testimonies coming out in this way.

But I also recognize that we/I could have done many things better. A big problem we have in TLR is a lack of structure, leadership, and accountability. Not accountability in a negative controlling way, but a healthy submission to one another and the elders in the fellowship.

When I look at the more than 3 years we were in the USA, I can say we saw God do amazing things. However, we never really reached the point of having strong leadership like we have in other countries in Europe, where we have walked with people for years. It has also been more difficult in America due to its size and the fact that many people are spread out all over.

My heart, and those closest to me, share the same desire. We truly want to see a mature body with sound doctrine, healthy families, and strong leadership. We want to see people grow in all aspects of life to bring honest glory to our God.

Are we there yet? No. We are not. Will we ever get there? I’m not sure. But I recognize that we can do much better. I write this as a plea to all of you out there in our family to help. This is not something that I or a few individuals can do alone. We need everyone to take part in the work that lies ahead of us. We need to grow up in so many ways. There is so much more God has for us.

These days, I am talking with different leaders and mature individuals about how we can move forward and what needs to happen.

Years ago, God told me the age of the church was over. He meant the age of big organizations with big buildings and lists of beliefs somewhat like the catechism. He meant the big hats, tacky robes, TV cameras, real estate empires, lawyers, and PR people. When I discovered TLR, I liked it, but I thought it would do what every Christian movement does: turn into a big church with the kinds of problems big churches have. And it’s doing just that.

It’s too big to control. There are too many gates to keep track of, so jackals and fools can come in.

I don’t know what specific events spurred Torben to write his email, but I had my own disappointing experience with TLR. I took my friend Mike there, thinking he would be baptized and move on.

Torben has a young friend named Jon Bjarnstein, and he was featured prominently at TLR meetings back then. Jon spoke for a while, and while he was speaking, he made jokes. Not really his forte. He joked about speaking in tongues, and while he was joking, he did what he thought was a funny imitation of tongues.

Mike was so put off, he insisted I baptize him at his hotel. He didn’t want anyone from TLR to do it. I had to admit, it seemed like Jon was blaspheming the Holy Spirit, and that’s a big sin. You should not mock the sound of the Holy Spirit.

I had dealt with Jon myself when I had TLR baptize me, and he seemed very full of himself, which was unseemly in such a young man, especially given my age. I felt he was dismissive when I spoke with him, as though he were talking to a kid. He was in a big hurry to make a decision for me and move on to the next person. He seemed crabby, like he was crashing after several espressos. He was assertive.

Christians in their teens and twenties often get the feeling they invented God and have all the answers. It’s a real problem. I think we don’t teach enough about pride. Many Christians think it’s a good thing, and many don’t recognize pride when they see it.

I’m sure he’s a faithful servant, but he needed someone older to sit him down and give him some tips, and Torben should not have put a microphone in front of him without fixing his manners.

My feeling is that TLR is not going to shape up. They are good at getting people up on the bike, but they don’t teach them how to get rid of their training wheels. Baptism and repentance are very important. Casting demons out is very important. But you have to teach people how to converse with God every day and be transformed continually by the Holy Spirit.

I think they will focus too much on becoming organized. Well, the Catholics did that, and look at them. Saint-worshiping heretics who may not even be Christians.

I would still recommend TLR to anyone who wants to get started with God, but after that, you need to pray in tongues every day, read the word, pray for correction, and learn how to do supernatural warfare. You have to keep moving forward.

2 Comments »

Pizza on Earth

February 6th, 2024

Maybe You Should Move

Sometimes I think about the people I went to high school with, and I wonder how different their lifestyles are from mine. A lot of them are surgeons and other types of doctors. Some are lawyers. Some are professional heirs, like the kids who inherited the Lennar fortune and the Mexican guy whose father was a real estate tycoon.

One blew his brains out at 25, after getting his MD. Another died while diving drunk. Another wandered off from a climbing team, fell into a crevasse in the Himalayas, and was left there. One former friend jumped off a bridge in San Diego because he was upset about his own homosexuality.

I’m sure many are driving leased foreign cars they turn in every year or two. They live in high-priced homes in Miami or around other big cities. They must have a lot of expensive jewelry. The women must have bags that cost four figures. I’m sure most of them hate Donald Trump and have low opinions of people who live in rural areas and vote for people who support Israel and the church.

A lot of them vacation in places like Vail, New York, and Paris. Surely.

I went to the best prep school in Florida, and our student body was around 50% Jewish. People don’t like to hear it, but Jews really are smarter than the rest of us. It was normal for about 10% of a graduating class to be Merit Scholars. A lot of people, like me, went off to Ivy League schools. People who ended up at places like the University of Miami were pitied.

I ended up getting two degrees from UM, so I slid into the loser demographic.

I live on a farm. I do nothing. I wear T-shirts and Carhartt pants every single day. I wear wool socks even in summer. I wear hiking shoes or work boots all the time.

I have a Ford and a Dodge Cummins. I shoot high-powered rifles in my backyard. I think DeSantis is the greatest governor who ever lived. I smoke ribs and brew beer. I have a very smart wife with two degrees who does all my housekeeping. She has no career. The thought of getting a job disturbs her. She loves her situation.

We go to restaurants like Sonny’s BBQ and an incredible Italian place run by Mexicans. They put it in a Pizza Hut that went out of business. You can tell it used to be a chain restaurant.

My wife buys clothes at Walmart and on Amazon. I wonder how many of my classmates would would wear Walmart clothes. One of these days we’ll go to Orlando and hit some of the nicer stores, but we have not done it yet.

She wears dresses. I think she is the only wife in America who wears dresses. When we go out, she looks like royalty compared to the other girls. American women have given up. When we walk around in the grocery store, it looks like the lady who inherited it has shown up to check up on her employees.

Single ladies, if you want to impress men, wear dresses. And I don’t mean short cocktail dresses that make you look like escorts.

I know not all of my classmates are successful, but many are, and they are generally leftists. One ran Planned Parenthood in Miami. I think most would find my lifestyle ridiculous.

Meanwhile, the wife and I are having a wonderful time, and we don’t worry about the kinds of things they worry about. Marital problems that come from marrying without God’s help, for shallow reasons. Debt from trying to impress other people. Job stress. Stress from dealing with coarse, selfish, malicious blue-city types. Boys who want to be castrated. Girls who have themselves skinned in order to make ridiculous fake penises.

We love the area we live in. I love it more than my wife, because I have lived in blue cities, and I know they are hellholes of damnation and rage.

The people here could not be nicer. I have been here almost 7 glorious years, and they still surprise me.

This is a county full of tradesmen and farmers. There are not a lot of educated people here. You wouldn’t want to go to the barber shop and toss off a reference to T.S. Eliot. There are a lot of tattoos. People drink bad beer. I don’t care. They’re fantastic. It’s a privilege to live among them.

I used to think people were like this in Eastern Kentucky, where my parents were born. They’re not. Not all Southerners are the same. In Eastern Kentucky, people are selfish. Stingy. They don’t tip. They are racist. They are very angry. They treat adultery as though it were a competitive sport. They shoot each other over nothing. They neglect and degrade their kids. They drink like crazy. They love drugs. They have very short tempers. They love ignorance. Childish people.

They’re nice on the surface, but the nice layer is very thin and fragile.

Of course, I’m generalizing. I’m not God. I can’t tell you what every person there is like, and if I could, you wouldn’t be able to absorb it. Human beings are limited. We have to generalize, and it’s a good thing. It works.

I had to go to Kentucky for my dad’s funeral, and my second cousin, who is a very nice, proper lady, told me she had told her kids to get out. She said there was nothing for them there.

My aunt says I’m ashamed of my people. Well, I’m definitely ashamed of her, if that counts. I have good reason. I’m ashamed of her son, too. He has done disgraceful things.

She boosts Eastern Kentucky like it was Wakanda. She’s like a black ghetto matriarch who insists her people are brilliant, virtuous victims whose problems are caused by predatory outsiders. No; sorry. They’re trashy. They bring it all on themselves. A lifestyle of drunkenness, adultery, divorce, invertebrate-level parenting, racism, willful ignorance, and persecution of people who better themselves is always going to lead to poverty.

Eastern Kentucky’s poverty is right and normal. It’s what’s supposed to happen to people who act the way they do. Everything is going as it should, under the circumstances.

Leftists up there love to say people like Carnegie came in and stole the coal, keeping the area poor. No; the people who owned it were ignorant and weak, and that was their own fault. If they had been better people, they would have kept the coal and the profits.

Look at Texas and oil. BAM. What’s their answer to that?

Texas is full of rich people whose ancestors were poor landowners. Kentucky is full of coal truck drivers whose ancestors sold their coal to people who went to school.

I guess it’s silly to talk about coal as though it were still important. Democrats killed it, and people in Eastern Kentucky voted for them because they love government handouts more than prosperity. I don’t know what coal truck drivers do for a living now. Maybe they’re all growing dope. They’re definitely not going to work in all those profitable businesses Eastern Kentuckians never built.

You could make a pretty long list of oil billionaires from Texas. Forbes says there are 45. Here’s a complete list of all the Eastern Kentucky coal billionaires who ever lived:

.
.
.
.

BAM.

I was flim-flammed when I was a kid. I thought Kentucky was paradise, and I thought the people were better than Miami people, who are unbearable. It’s actually a wash, or maybe I’d give the edge to Miami.

I feel like apologizing to God for being fooled.

Anyway, I started writing today to tell about a restaurant I discovered recently. I’ve known about it for a long time, and I got takeout once a few years ago, but I never went inside until a few days back. They didn’t accept credit cards when I moved here, so I formed a habit of driving past. They changed their policy, so now I’m not discouraged from going in.

It’s a pizza place. Plain old red-and-white Italian food. Spaghetti, ziti, and lasagna.

I went in with my buddy Mike, and I was very impressed.

It’s probably the cleanest restaurant I’ve ever seen. I was not able to see a speck of debris anywhere. It looked like it had been gone over by a professional crew the day before. Restaurants here tend to have dirty floors and greasy menus, but this one was like an operating room. I marveled at it, and that is not an exaggeration.

The staff was very nice, and they were sharp. They got things done.

The food was okay. That’s all I can say about it. They need to get better cheese, and they should look into Stanislaus tomato products. But it’s okay. It’s reasonably good, and it’s close and cheap.

They had blinds on all the windows, and they were all pulled down. I couldn’t see out. I felt like I was in a spaceship on the way to heaven.

I’ve eaten there twice in the last week.

The last time we visited, Mike and I spent a lot of time talking about God, and while we were talking, I heard a waitress talking behind him. She was standing in the aisle with her hand on a customer’s shoulder. He was telling her something. A testimony. Something good had happened. I didn’t hear what.

She started saying, “Thank you, JESUS. Thank you, JESUS.” Everyone in the place heard it. She didn’t seem to think about that at all. No one looked up. No dirty looks. It was business as usual.

Wonderful. No wonder the restaurant is in such good order. They acknowledge God.

Not everyone here is like that, and there are a lot of dirty, disappointing restaurants, but there are lots of very serious Christians here. They even play Christian music over the speakers in chain stores and restaurants.

God has been so good to my wife and me. It is confusing.

The presence of God and Christians is something you can’t appreciate or miss until you have experienced it. You have to live in a place like this and a place like New York before you understand how much better Christian areas are. God was right. All the things he told us in the Bible were right. His ways work, and the filthy leftist ways that predominate in America are like AIDS and syphilis, rotting people as they stand.

Never doubt it. Never let them gaslight you. Never take advice from losers.

Experiences like this make me hate this world even more. In my prayers, I beg God to bring the rapture soon. Imagine living in a place where everyone agrees about everything. Everyone is bathed in love, continuously. In heaven, you won’t need guns, locks, passwords, cops, antivirus programs, medicines, surgeries…it won’t be like the earth, where trillions of creatures are out to get you every second of your life. On Earth during the millennium, there will still be some evil, but it will be a place of rest and peace and love.

2 Comments »

Termites and Probability

February 5th, 2024

Welcome, Friends

If you’re old and moderately good at math, and you know the Holy Spirit, you often know the answers to simple questions other people, oddly, find difficult.

This week, someone asked me if I thought Chinese spies were entering the US under our no-borders policy. I didn’t say I thought they were entering. I said they were, in fact, entering.

Imagine you’re a Chinese official. You want to have many spies in the US. That is not a statement a reasonable person can dispute. You have a choice between working hard to get them in legally, with lots of documentation the US government can rely on to track them, taking a great deal of time, or you can tell them to walk in from Mexico.

What would you do?

I’m sure many Chinese moles are coming in legally. There must be advantages to legal entry in many cases. But the Chinese would have to be morons to refrain from sending people in illegally.

Yesterday, I saw a news item saying Denver police had arrested 50 Al Qaeda members in two months. I can’t promise you it’s true. It comes from a popular Twitter channel. The proprietor says he got the info from a Denver cop who could not allow himself to be identified.

For a moment, let’s forget the question of whether this story is true. Let’s ask ourselves an easier question. Have a lot of Islamist terrorists, from numerous organizations including Al Qaeda, entered the US since we decided borders were racist and promoted global warming and transphobia?

Yes. Of course they have.

There are hundreds of millions of Muslims who want to destroy the US and Israel. There are millions who are willing to get involved personally. They have a long history of violating our immigration laws to enter our country and commit acts of terror.

Why would they choose not to take advantage of an open door policed by a lying dotard who cares a lot about himself and his degenerate children, but very little about his country? There is no plausible scenario in which that happens.

It doesn’t matter whether the Denver story is true, because Islamist savages are definitely coming in. It’s like asking whether fat women will show up if Cinnabon gives away rolls.

If Muslim terror countries let people cross their borders with no vetting, we would be sending people in to undermine them. Why would they behave differently? It’s common sense.

How many terrorists were on the hijacking teams on 9/11? Nineteen. By now, the number of terrorists Biden has let in must be thousands of times that number. If 19 killed over 3000 people in a few hours, what will thousands do?

“DHS will stop them. We have all sorts of top people, using brilliant strategies and great surveillance tools.”

Wrong. That’s not how the government works. That’s how Google and Facebook work, to deprive us of our rights.

We have surveillance and tracking tools that are easy to get around, and they are administered by…government employees and contractors. Chelsea Manning was a government employee. Edward Snowden was a government contractor. They guy who leaked Donald Trump’s tax returns was a contractor. Do I have to go on?

Joe Biden is a government employee surrounded by Secret Service agents, and he threw boxes of classified boxes into his garage and left them there.

It would be so neat if Secret Service agents were like Frank Farmer in The Bodyguard. They’re not. They’re not master martial artists. If a real agent got in a fight with a guy the size of Frank Starr, he would probably get squashed. They can’t shoot a fly out of the air at a hundred yards. They’re not particularly smart. Look at Dan Bongino. Reasonably bright. Not a genius.

Very smart people rarely become law enforcement officers of any kind. That kind of work grinds smart people down.

How many incredibly stupid things has the government done since you were born? Things you, personally, with zero training, would have prevented had you been in charge?

Think about January 6. Eighteen years after 9/11, a bunch of beered-up, unarmed, untrained, disorganized rally attendees walked right into Congress. They could have killed all sorts of legislators had they desired to. That tells you everything you need to know about the security our government provides.

If I were an ayatollah, I would have slapped my forehead on that day. “We plotted and struggled. We shot down complicated plans because we didn’t think they were sure things. We waited and waited, hoping for an answer. We could have just WALKED IN.”

If you think 15 Islamists with AK-47’s couldn’t jump the White House fence and kill the president in 10 minutes, you are way more charitable than I am.

They’re here. Don’t be stupid.

Reagan was surrounded by Secret Service agents, and he still took a .22 to the chest. A mental case with a Saturday night special shot him and two other people before the professionals managed to do anything. I doubt things are much better today.

We rely very heavily on the power of intimidation. We create the false appearance of competence and formidability, instead of taking realistic measures that work. And our enemies consistently fall for it, until they don’t.

You know who we should hire? Casino owners. They’re better at security then the government will ever be. They know when a grandmother from Des Moines is counting cards, and they ban her right away, sending her photos to every casino in America. We let the same deportees come in over and over until somebody gets raped or murdered. The only tools we have that stop illegals are prison and the death penalty, and they’re in the hands of the judicial system and the corrections system, not the State Department or our intelligence or security agencies, which fail every hour of every day.

Well, we have one other tool that works wonders. The Second Amendment.

Illegals swarming the borders remind me of vampires in movies, who have to ask permission to enter houses. If you let them in, it’s on you. It’s our responsibility to keep them out, and we could do it if we wanted. Easily. We have too many DEI concerns to do it right.

The stupidity we are witnessing comes from spirits. We have rejected God so we can have pride and so men can get at each other’s filthy anuses without legal or social impediment. It’s astonishing. It makes no sense. It is literally mental illness. It’s what happens when you get away from the Holy Spirit. You can believe anything, no matter how absurd, and you can think it’s righteous to murder those who tell the truth.

I wish God would end this age and get his children out of here. I feel like I live on the grounds of a mental asylum. No wonder they’re called “asylum seekers.”

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Smoke ‘Em if You Got ‘Em

February 3rd, 2024

Tough Saturday

Slow day today.

My old friend Mike is visiting. We have been providing him with a Florida base while he starts a new business and decides where he will finally live. He sold his home in New Hampshire in 2022.

My wife is starting a long fast. She thinks she will go 21 days. But there is a loophole. She only fasts until 6 p.m.

Mike likes ribs. She likes ribs. I have some ribs I need to get rid of while they still have some flavor. They are in the smoker right now. One rack of baby backs and one rack of real ribs.

I have avoided baby backs for years. They’re small. They seem dry and tough to me. They’re expensive. Spare ribs are big, juicy, delicious, tender, and cheap. I have never been able to see the appeal of baby backs. My feeling is that it’s a gimmick that appeals to women, who always seem to get suckered in by wrong food. Women eat filets instead of rib eyes. That’s all I need to say about that.

It’s small. It’s cute. It’s more expensive. It has less fat. It must be better! This is the kind of logic that drove my mother to pay $18 for one bar of soap in the 1980’s. So today, $100.

I saw baby backs on sale, so I grabbed two racks and froze them. I smoked a rack a while ago. They were okay, and that’s the nicest thing I can say.

I rejoined Sam’s Club a while ago, and they have good prices on never-frozen spare ribs, so I now have even less reason to buy baby backs.

Offering fresh spare ribs to Southerners at good prices is like setting corn out for deer. It’s not fair.

I asked some people what to do with baby backs. Some guy who swears they’re wonderful said to cook them until you’re between 192° and 194°. Go by temperature, not time.

I’m trying it, but it seems ridiculous. If one part of a rack of ribs is at 192°, another part could be at 185°. I’m using a probe thermometer anyway.

Truthfully, I think I should just smoke them until the wood is gone, wrap them in foil, and bake at 200° until edible.

My electric smoker doesn’t produce smoke rings in meat. I am trying to cheat by adding a tiny amount of pink curing salt to my rub, but you can’t taste a smoke ring, so it doesn’t matter.

I’m not making anything exciting to go with the ribs. Robert Irvine’s cole slaw recipe, with small changes. I think he uses too much sugar, and I am too lazy to go out and buy white wine vinegar. We’ll be having roasted Sam’s Club corn. I wrapped it in foil with salt and butter, and I’ll roast at 425°.

My wife might persuade me to make bread for Texas toast. She really hates American factory bread.

I finished making a new stout. I call it Steppe Brother imperial stout, but I may change the name. There are so many breweries now, the good, easy names are all taken. I considered “Moose and Squirrel.” Taken. I’m now thinking “Fearless Leader.” Crazy Ivan is taken. Tsar Bomba is taken. There is no point in even discussing Black Russian. Maybe I’ll call it KGB Boot Polish.

I took my dry stout recipe and increased everything but the water, and I used Kveik Lutra yeast. I took a sample from the fermenter yesterday, and it’s wonderful. Like a dark chocolate milkshake with some vodka hidden in it. I may increase the bitterness a little bit next time.

Most beers get all of their bitterness from hops, but dark beers get part of their bitterness from burned grain. If I make a change, I’ll have to decide which ingredient to increase.

I wonder if dark beers were invented by people who were low on hops.

Some guy on a forum is arguing with me, claiming dark beers don’t rely on roasted grain for bitterness. That’s silly. Burned grain is bitter, like roasted coffee. If you go to sites about brewing grain, you will see that they say dark grains impart bitterness.

Now I’m wondering if the sharp flavors from roasted barley are acidic, not bitter. Anyway, they balance sweetness.

You’re all caught up on the news from the Heavily Armed Gated North Florida Compound. I can only imagine your excitement.

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Marriage Sitrep

February 2nd, 2024

We Found a Good Relationship Coach

I married a foreigner in 2021, and it took my wife until late last year to get here. During our time apart, which was broken up by overseas trips, people asked me how we were doing, and I always said we were doing great. Married life was good. Sometimes they would tell me to wait until we had been married longer. One said we were still on our honeymoon, because we had spent so little time together. Things would get harder.

I feel I should respond now.

First of all, God has made me aware of two dangerous sins: the sin of Job, and the sin of Joseph.

Job’s sin was that he defended himself before God, as though he deserved a perfect life because he was so obedient. This is what God told him off for when he appeared to Job. He didn’t tell him he wasn’t obedient. He criticized Job’s pride because Job thought he could show God that it was wrong to let him suffer.

Everybody deserves to suffer.

Joseph’s sin was that he was proud of favor. His dad loved him more than his other sons, and he gave him a fancy coat. Joseph danced around in the coat before the others. Joseph also had dreams in which his brothers and even his parents bowed before him, and this irked everyone in the family.

Hezekiah committed the same sin. He showed foreigners all the treasure God had give him, and Isaiah came and told him his family was cursed.

We have to testify about God’s goodness, but we aren’t supposed to brag needlessly, so I suppose there has to be some kind of balance.

I don’t want to brag about my marriage in a way that causes my wife and me problems, but I do want to praise God.

The strange truth is that we get along better and better every day. We get along better now, dealing with routine life and its challenges, than we did on fancy trips to exotic lands, where we did little but stuff ourselves with food and buy things we didn’t need.

There were some moments of friction on our trips, but nearly nothing of that sort has taken place here, and we have a fantastic time together. We laugh constantly. We treat each other with honor. We are patient with each other. Each of us does more for the other than is required, and that helps prevents spats.

My wife really loves me. There are things you can’t fake. I didn’t snag a gold digger.

So why are things going so well? Plenty of other people have failed to get along with us, and neither of us can say we were never to blame.

Prayer in tongues is a necessary part of a proper Christian life. It’s not optional or dispensable.

When you pray in tongues, God aligns your heart and mind with his.

Married couples, and friends, and coworkers, and rulers of nations, need to be aligned with each other in order for peace to exist. It’s not possible to make this happen without divine help. If it were, it would have happened already, and it hasn’t.

If your heart and mind are aligned with God’s, and so are your wife’s, you will be aligned with each other. There is no way around it. You can’t be aligned with God and in conflict with each other.

God gives us grace to pray in tongues a lot. We don’t have a perfect record, but he has managed to help us pray enough to make us one with each other.

If you and your wife aren’t praying in tongues, you’re probably working hard on your own to make your marriage work. With this method, success is not always possible.

I sincerely believe the Holy Spirit makes our marriage work, and if we get away from him, we may cease to get along and even divorce. I don’t believe we deserve any credit. It would be dangerous to claim it.

Things are going well, and it’s not because we’re great people. It is pure charity. All we did was stop resisting when God told us to pray in tongues.

This is how I feel as we approach our third anniversary.

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Satan Needs a Red Carpet Interview

January 31st, 2024

Expect Gushing Over his “Brave and Stunning” Backless Vera Wang Gown

When Paul heard that a self-proclaimed Christian was having sex with the wife of his own father, he turned the man over to Satan for the destruction of his flesh. Paul said the purpose of doing this was to save the man’s spirit in the day of the Lord Jesus.

It was a curse, but it wasn’t a condemnation to hell. The purpose of the curse was to either wake the man up, through affliction of his flesh, or to make him suffer the permanent consequences. We are often cursed for various reasons. Whether problems turn out to be curses in the long run depends on us. A person who is repentant and close to God can’t really be cursed, in the strictest sense of the word. He can only be afflicted temporarily, because curses can’t stick to those who are forgiven and repentant. If we refuse to repent, though, curses are just curses. They stick forever or until they run their courses.

I was thinking about this world just now, and I realized it’s just like a man. God will pour out the tribulation soon, and because it will be horrible to endure, people will see it as a curse. But the people who repent during that time will be saved and taken to heaven, so to them, it will turn out to be a blessing.

The people who won’t listen will endure it as an unredeemed curse, and they will go to hell and the lake of fire, forever. Thank God for that, because that’s where they should be. The saved can’t be expected to tolerate these people and their abuse forever.

“Tribulation” doesn’t mean “punishment” or “disaster.” It’s a harvesting technique. It comes from farming, like plowing and sowing. God will use the tribulation to help people by driving them into his fold. They will be harvested. He will glean the corners of the field. The rest–the tares–will suffer and burn for eternity. How you respond to the tribulation determines whether it’s a curse or a blessing in the long run.

When ancient farmers used tribulums to separate grain from trash, they didn’t think they were punishing their grain.

T.B. Joshua has been banned from Youtube again.

T.B. Joshua died suddenly and peacefully, living in abundance, with no apparent health problems, in 2021, while my wife and I were in Egypt, on the cruise during which I proposed to her.

This was not long after his first Youtube ban. He had a channel called Emmanuel TV, and it was THE biggest Christian channel. A small but vocal group of sodomites got Youtube to ban him because he appeared in a video, casting demons of perversion out of a man. There was no appeal. It was persecution, plain and simple. Joshua broke no laws. He simply did what Christians are supposed to do. His channel was destroyed because he was a proper Christian.

His church put up another channel, which Youtube tolerated until a few days back.

Recently, BBC Africa put up a disgraceful mockumentary hit piece in which discredited witnesses lied about Joshua, claiming rape, physical abuse, and all sorts of other things. Not all of the witnesses have been discredited, but the process was in the works. Emmanuel TV published videos discrediting them and BBC Africa, and because Emmanuel TV is gone now, the process of discrediting false witnesses on Youtube has been greatly curtailed, so if the job isn’t finished, it’s only because Emmanuel TV has been gagged again. It’s not because the remaining witnesses are telling the truth.

Even if one or two are right, which is unlikely, this man and his ministry did many miracles, not just for people in his presence, but for people far away, like my wife.

Moses was a murderer, as was David. They were still legitimate men of God.

Youtube is openly antichristian. The mask came off in 2021, and now we have been reminded again.

My wife told me about the new ban yesterday, and I said Satan should just appear and talk to people directly. He should have press conferences, complete with the tail and horns. He’s so obvious now. And a big percentage of people would be thrilled to see him. They would see him as their savior. I’ll bet 25% of Americans would gladly worship Satan right now if he appeared on national TV.

I used to think the antichrist–the man–would hide his allegiance to Satan, but now I doubt that. Why should he hide it? People will be fine with it. He can say, “I get my power and great ideas from Satan, who has been slandered by [wait for it] THE JEWS. And Christians. He’s actually wonderful. Christians and Jews, though, not so much. They have to go. They stood between you and your real savior. Jesus is the real devil. He’s a homophobe and a transphobe.”

STEM people already wear T-shirts featuring drawings of Satan, with captions like, “Keep Learning Science, Kids.” People at CERN created and published a video of men in robes offering a naked woman (can’t say “virgin”) to Satan. We have Satanism clubs in schools. Satanists deliver opening prayers at government meetings. Satan is like a wrongly deposed leader living in exile. He can come home now.

Jews used to worship Satan openly. Modern Chasids like to think they carry a perfect, untainted torch, from a religion that never failed God, but that’s a pathetic delusion. There are ancient synagogues in Israel that have two altars: one for Yahweh, and one for “the queen of heaven,” or Ashtoreth/Venus/Aphrodite/Ishtar/Easter. Not only did they worship Satan, they did it in their synagogues.

They had a place in the valley of Gehenna/Hinnom where they burned their babies alive at a statue of Moloch. Jews. Religious ones who went to synagogues and the temple. The did it openly. Close to the temple of Yahweh.

Jezebel was the queen of Israel, she paid hundreds of false prophets to administer the worship of Satan, and she killed the prophets of Yahweh, in public, en masse, with the Jewish king’s eager help.

Jews worshiped a golden cow representing Satan as the Egyptian false god Hathor, while witnessing God’s miracles every day. Anyone who says we would all worship God properly if he were just more obvious is a fool. Just look at the Jews under Moses.

We are no different. Most of us will be happy to worship Satan or Moloch or Vishnu or whatever he calls himself. If he tells us to worship a cinderblock or a pile of manure, we’ll worship that. People have done pretty much the same thing with idols.

I have had it with this place. I wish Yeshua would come right this minute. It’s not going to get better. The world is like a big, painful carbuncle loaded with hot, fermenting pus under tremendous pressure. Yeshua needs to come, lance it, and heal it. Clean bandages for the wounds. An incinerator for the pus.

Evangelization is going nowhere. We don’t see the numbers we saw during the last centuries. We do see an astronomical increase in pride, sin, and blasphemy. Christians who think we’re about to take over the world are out of their minds. Yeshua couldn’t do it. The early church, with all its miracles and prophesies couldn’t do it. We’re much weaker and filthier. How are we supposed to do it? Guitar masses and Christian rap? Be serious. It’s not going to work.

God himself could not do it, so it’s ridiculous to expect us to do it. It’s arrogant. It’s ignorant. The only answer is for God himself, not Christians with AR-15’s, to exterminate and incarcerate the damned intractable and remove all evil spirits from the earth. This is what the Bible says he will do.

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They are a Good Girl

January 28th, 2024

Yes They Are

In case anyone is wondering how close we are to the rapture, here is a hint. A CBS affiliate in Albany, New York, just used a woke pronoun for a dog.

How stupid will people have to become before this all ends?

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Bag Man

January 27th, 2024

New Recipe in the Can

Today is a brew day.

My last brew was an ale somewhat like an IPA. I ordinarily use a German Braumeister brewing machine, but I lost an O-ring, so while I wait for a new one (and possibly forever), I am doing brew-in-a-bag, or BIAB. This means I put a mesh bag in my kettle, heat water in it, dump in my grain, and mash in the bag. When it’s done, I pull the bag out and wring the wort out of it. Very simple.

I’m making an imperial stout.

Everyone knows what stout is. The “imperial” in “imperial stout” refers to the Russian imperial court.

For some reason I do not know, Russians used to buy British beer instead of brewing their own. They liked stout. Because beer had to be shipped a long way to get to Russia, the beer had to be tough enough to take the heat and bouncing without degrading. The British found that extremely strong, thick beers held up well. They made very strong stout and shipped it to Russia.

It’s an interesting beverage. It tends to be sweet. It has a ton of aroma from the roasted grains that make it dark, as well as the hops. In terms of alcohol, it’s around twice as strong as most beers. That’s a generalization. Some imperial stouts are a lot stronger.

The stout I’m trying to make is my own recipe. I took my recipe for ordinary stout, which is fantastic, and I simply increased the amounts of everything.

Some people advise brewers not to increase the hopping along with everything else, but others disagree. I asked for advice, and homebrewing celebrity Denny Conn, who is known for making heavy beers, was in favor of jacking everything up together.

I think that’s the right approach. In an experiment, you should limit the variables you change. If I increase everything, the stout may not be what I want, but it should be easy to figure out what I need to change. And it may be perfect without changes.

I’m using East Kent Goldings hops, which are very popular for stouts. I’m going to try Lutra Kveik yeast.

My understanding is that “kveik” means “quick” in Norwegian. Kveik comes from Norway. It’s a yeast that has traditionally been used by rural Norwegians. I guess if you pronounce “quick” like a Norwegian, it probably sounds like “kveik,” which, I am told, rhymes with “shake.” Lutra is just a strain of kveik.

Kveik is, indeed, quick. That’s one thing people like about it. You can make a beer in maybe three days. It also ferments cleanly at high temperatures, so you don’t get toxic heavy alcohols and fruit flavors. Brewers like to use kveik to make beers that are pretty much like traditional lagers. Lagers are generally fermented cold, and they take forever. Kveik lets brewers speed things up, and it obviates the need for fermenter cooling. A regular lager might ferment at 50, but Kveik goes up to 90.

I generally use a yeast called US-05 for stout, but it’s very slow. It’s supposed to be the yeast they use in Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, which is an okay but not really fantastic beer. US-05 is supposed to ferment cleanly at 68.

I am tired of waiting a long time for stouts, and since I’m not looking for yeast flavors, any clean-fermenting yeast will do. If kveik is what they say it is, it ought to be great.

People say you need a ton of yeast for heavy beers. I have only made one heavy beer, and it went like crazy using one packet of dry yeast. I didn’t rehydrate it. I just dumped it in the fermenter. It was done in maybe 4 days. The yeast I used is Abbaye, a yeast taken from Belgian ales. It seems to me that if one vigorous yeast will work in heavy beers without pampering, others will also work.

I think I’ll rehydrate the kveik, but that’s all the work I’m willing to do.

The ale I made a week ago is probably done. It went from 1.056 to 1.013. I fermented at 63 in hopes of reducing the banana flavors the yeast gives off, and I think it worked. The gas coming out of the keg doesn’t smell like bananas. Last night I moved it to 68 to speed things up and get it over with. My understanding is that fruity flavors develop at the beginning of fermentation, so raising the temperature should be safe now.

I used Crystal as my aroma hop. It usually smells spicy. This time, it smells citrusy, which it’s not supposed to do. The samples I took tasted great, however.

UPDATE

The stout turned out to be a job. It did not want to come through the bag. I had to squeeze it ruthlessly. Then I put it on an oven grate on a cooler and pour about half a gallon of hot water through it.

I found myself at 1.115 after the boil, so I had to add a lot of water. I got to 1.085. I believe I have right around 5 gallons.

Now I know how to deal with a big stout and my brewing bag, so next time, the job will go faster. It will also help if my wife doesn’t come in while I’m working and demand a trip to get barbecue.

The fermenting keg is full, and it’s in the pool, chilling. I plan to leave it outdoors tonight because the temperature will be good for fermentation. Maybe I’ll move it inside tomorrow.

I look forward to seeing what kveik can do. It would be neat to have a good imperial stout kegged and carbed in under a week.

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Going to Pot

January 24th, 2024

Greta Thunberg Should Have to Literally Eat This

I expect a new victory over Social Justice Warriors.

Being dirty is a big part of being a Social Justice Warrior. A lot of their vacuous Hollywood icons (generally white) brag about rarely or never bathing. The SJW’s got our shower heads restricted. They absolutely ruined clothes washers so all new front-loaders make clothes stink of mildew.

Cleanliness is part of white supremacy, even though American black people are generally cleaner than whites. They must be Uncle Toms.

The green goofs have gone after our toilets, too, making sure they flush poorly so we get to spend more time dealing with poo.

When I moved here, this house had three Briggs Vacuity toilets. You would not believe how complex they are. I can’t describe it because I don’t understand it. I can give a couple of details. A Vacuity has an upside-down plastic jug in the tank, with a weird plastic pipe sticking up into it.

A Vacuity uses very little water, which is meaningless to me, because I have a well and a septic tank. Whatever water the toilet uses goes back into my yard and eventually into the water table. I like to think something magical happens to it before it finds its way back to the well, but let’s not discuss that.

The Vacuity toilet is a lot like Al Gore’s curly fluorescent bulbs. It does not work. It makes things worse, not better.

The design is built to fail because there are so many fiddly parts. On top of that, and I just learned this, a Vacuity toilet chokes easily and cannot be plunged. Or snaked. Not kidding here.

If your Vacuity chokes, you’re expected to remove it from the floor and plunge or snake the drain line itself. One guy came up with a plan involving two people, an air compressor, and a towel, and he claims you can plunge the toilet that way, but I’m not going out like that.

Contractors recommend using flimsy toilet paper, and not much of it, when pooping in Vacuity toilets. That’s their solution. It wouldn’t bother me, because I’m a man, and I think Scott toilet paper rocks, but now I have a wife who adores Charmin, so the toilet has COPD.

Oh, I can try the towel trick. I can haul my compressor into the garage and hope for the best. Or I can pay a plumber $350 to fix the can. Or I can get rid of it and put a new one in, for about $260. I’ll never have to deal with it again.

Briggs does not support Vacuity toilets. Not the important, proprietary parts that go bad. That tells you what they think of their own engineering. Briggs is a disgrace to the bowel-movement-movement industry.

Guess what I decided to do.

I ordered a Toto Entrada two-piece john, and the top half arrived yesterday. The bottom half supposedly arrives today.

I replaced my master Vacuity (I make a point of using the word “master” these days) last year. I put in a one-piece Toto Drake. A masterful design, made by slaves to excellence.

Toto makes the best toilets imaginable. They’re Japanese, and the Japanese have a sick fetish about toilet design. They make singing toilets that look like recliners. You can spend Toyota money on a Japanese toilet. Their lower-end sane toilets are great, too. They never break down, and even though they don’t suck much water, they can flush nearly anything. Odd, given the size of the average Japanese.

Some types of green technology eventually work, after two decades or so of horror stories about rushed garbage the government forced on the public before it was ready. Like the current horror stories about washing machines and flaming, subsidized, actually coal-powered Teslas that don’t work in the winter.

I don’t care about the environment, but I don’t mind helping it out when it benefits yours truly. A low-flow toilet takes a shorter time to refill, so you spend less time getting that second round off, when needed.

I’ve had Kohler toilets, which many people recommend. Mine were junk, which is why I know about Toto. The Kohlers failed, and they were designed so stupidly, fixing them was a bad idea.

My Drake cost over $600, which is pretty awful, but that’s because it’s a glamorous one-piece can. They’re cleaner, but they’re more expensive to make and ship, I think. A two-piece has a gap between the tank and bowl, and all kinds of filth and critters can get in there. But you save $400.

I don’t care about the filth and critters. It’s for the guest bath. They’re lucky I don’t make them go outside.

I learned something interesting. Toilets have poo-consumption ratings. They’re called MAX ratings. My new toilet uses very little water, but it has a 1000-gram rating. They measure it using shredded toilet paper mixed with cold peanut butter. Just kidding. They mix some other thing with the paper, but I forget what it is.

If you can manage a kilo, or 2.2 pounds, you’re doing something wrong. That’s Steven Seagal territory. Oprah before drugs.

The old pot is now very clean and virtually empty. Bleached inside out and treated with poo- and urine-eating enzymes. Some of the parts are in the garage. The seat and bidet thing are off. I have to run out and get a foam ring so I can install the new one.

I hope the flange and pipe are lined up better than the last one. I had a wonderful time trying to make the Drake work. I also had to scrape hardened grout off the tiles because that’s what the installer used to shim the bowl. That was stupid. If I have to shim this one, I’ll use pressure-treated wood.

Now my biggest problem is getting the nearest dump to take the toilet. I’m supposed to drive a lot farther. It’s considered construction waste. I’m thinking I’ll bust it with a sledge and put the fragments in boxes. The dump attendants generally don’t care, but I might get a wise guy. I’ve seen them let people throw lawnmower batteries in with regular garbage. Even I felt a hint of disapproval.

Mingled with admiration.

I feel bad about all the dead bodies I’ve run through the band saw and disposed of in bags, but what are you going to do? Leave them in the yard where coyotes can grab them and eat them in front of the neighbors, ruining parties and scaring kids away from their still-intact pinatas?

It’s not like I have a crawlspace.

It’s not my fault. My gate has a sign, and it clearly states, “NO PEDDLERS.”

I’m really hoping I can get rid of this green abomination by dinner time. I don’t want to fight with it for two days, and besides, we all know what happens right after dinner.

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How to Waste Hundreds of Dollars and Make Brewing Even Harder

January 19th, 2024

Trust the Germans to Overcomplicate

I’m brewing today. I was not satisfied with the last batch of Disaster Management Ale I brewed, so I am replacing it.

Ordinarily, I use a Braumeister 20-liter electric brewing machine, made in Germany. I bought it a year ago, when I went back to brewing. Today I’m doing BIAB, or “Brew In A Bag.”

When I started brewing in 2002, I did it the hard way, like everyone else. I mashed in a big pot. I moved the mash to an Igloo cooler with a screen in the bottom. I poured hot water over the mash to get all the sugar out. I moved the wort back to the pot to boil it. I used so many things, the cleaning was worse than the brewing.

I have no idea how I got the boiled wort into the fermenter. I think I picked up the 40-gallon pot with hot wort in it and poured, hoping for the best. I’m not sure.

When I started brewing again, I thought I’d take the easy way out, so I bought the Braumeister. It has a computer, a pump, and a heater. It does all the mashing and boiling for you, but you still have to lift the wet grain out before the boil, which is a pain.

I figured it had to be the best way, since it was the most expensive. I bought my machine used, but a new one runs $3,000. I paid less than a third of that.

A Braumeister is a stainless pot on legs with a heating element and a pump in it. The element and pump are connected to a computer in the bottom. There is a foot-wide stainless tube you stand up in the machine, in the water, and you dump your grain in it. The pump pushes the water through the grain continuously, and the computer keeps the heat where you want it.

It’s a real pain to wash, and you have to have a 220 circuit. It only works for beers under starting specific gravities of maybe 1.085. You have to play tricks on it to get that high.

I thought it would be great, and it works very well, but it has a lot of parts that have to be removed and washed every time I use it. On top of that, the Speidel company, which makes these machines, has a small presence in the US, and they do a poor job of supplying parts.

To brew in a bag, you need…a bag. You get a nylon bag that fits the inside of your pot. You put the bag in, with the mouth fastened to the rim of the pot. You heat water in the pot. You dump the grain in. You control the temperature however you can to mash it, and then you pull the bag out. You put an oven rack on top of the pot. You put the bag on the rack. It sits there and drains the wort back into the pot. You move the rack. You set the bag aside. Then you boil.

It’s a real cinch. That’s what I learned today.

When I was done brewing tonight, the kitchen was less messed up than it is when I make barbecue. Cleaning was quick and simple. I wish I had never fooled with the Braumeister.

Today I brewed Disaster Management Ale. It’s a lot like an IPA in terms of grain, but I use Nugget hops for bittering and Crystal for aroma. My understanding is that this combination is considered classic now, but I was using it 18 years ago.

This stuff should be ready to keg in a week. After that, I may make a stout, to prevent me from running out when the current keg dries up.

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