God is Better Than I am

I don’t know what to say. A few minutes ago, before 8 a.m., I summoned the strength to check the news. It hit me so hard, I lost my composure for a moment.

Yesterday I was very honest about my inner struggle, and I’m going to be honest again. My emotional moment was not caused by concern about America; not primarily. I don’t have high hopes for America, and my concerns were more selfish. I was primarily concerned about my own relationship with God.

For weeks, I have been praying for Hillary to lose (not so much for Trump to win), and I have been speaking defeat to Hillary. I kept feeling faith surge through me, saying Trump was going to take it. It was the same faith I had felt in other battles, before emerging on top. I got miraculous healings with this faith. I got help for friends in trouble with this faith. I got victory over nasty people with this faith. But it was telling me a man who was behind in crucial battleground states was going to win the presidency, and I could not make myself rest in it.

This is a great thing to write about, because it separates God’s glory from my glory. I had the faith–the Holy Spirit spoke to me again and again–but it was hard for me to listen to it, because my mind is not that strong. This will sound strange to someone who doesn’t have supernatural faith, but I was afraid to believe my faith. I failed, but God was strong.

I went to bed before 10 p.m., because I was determined not to get caught up in the nail-biting. No matter what I felt, I kept thanking God for defeating Hillary. I woke up in the middle of the night, and I didn’t want to check the news. I thanked God for defeating Hillary. I spoke defeat to her. I spoke victory to Donald Trump and the Spirit-led people of America.

Even while I was telling God I was worried about my relationship with him, because the polls were telling me the thing I was building my life around–revelation–was an illusion, I continued to thank God for doing what my faith had said he would do.

Where would I be if Hillary had won? America would be about the same. We would be moving to the bottom more quickly, but that’s about it. The ship, which is sinking anyway, would go down faster. Unlike America, I would have been affected profoundly. I would have had to start over with God. I would have had to re-evaluate everything he had taught me since I turned back to him. My world would have had no foundation.

I can’t go back to the secular life. It’s dead to me. Without God, I would have nothing at all.

That’s why I was disturbed yesterday. America was a secondary consideration. I can’t be married to the fate of America. I can’t do that much about it, and I know the end is going to be bad.

When you look at the supernatural, you always have to look at both sides of the coin. If Trump had lost, I would have endured a spiritual crisis. Because he won, I suppose I have a great personal victory. I’ve been thinking so much about defeat, I didn’t think about victory until just now.

The more times your faith is rewarded, the stronger your trust in God will be. That’s my payoff. The next time I’m stuck at the edge of the Red Sea with the Egyptians behind me, I’ll remember Trump. I won’t have to hole up and regroup. I won’t have to conduct a personal audit. I’ll be able to go forward with confidence in the only thing anyone should trust: the goodness of God.

I can’t describe the relief.

I’ve been praying for God to help Christians behave correctly. I’ve asked him to help us not to gloat or spout abuse. I know a lot of people will do that. If the left had won, the filth coming from their mouths would be unbearable right now, and many of us are no better than they are.

The Bible says that if you gloat over your enemy, God may take his hand off of him and take away your victory. We need to keep that in mind.

I’ve been praying for God to help us see this as what it was: a narrow escape we don’t deserve. Christians did more than unbelievers to put Obama and Hillary in power. We turned from God. We didn’t pray. We didn’t submit. We’re the most powerful people on earth. Unbelievers don’t have the ability to change the world the way we do. Their rebellion is bad, but they’re at the mercy of fate. We’re the ones who decide what happens. We decided to give our enemies success. I’ve been praying God will help us, during this short respite, to turn to him and increase his harvest of souls. I’ve been asking him to help us prepare for the Rapture.

I admit, I’m looking around to see what’s happening on the left. I’m checking CNN. The Fox people look like they just won the lottery. They’re all smiles. Over at CNN, everyone seems to be trying to figure out what went “wrong.” How did the American people make such a huge mistake?

I’m wondering what will happen now. I expected people to riot if Trump won. The entitlement-minded people who supported Hillary felt Republicans had no right to speak, vote, or even exist. They were violent and profane. They were unethical, cruel, and ruthless. They’re not going to see a loss as the just result of a reasonably fair election. They’re going to think they were cheated out of their right to take over America. I don’t expect them to handle it with maturity.

This will be a good week to keep an eye on Drudge. He always finds these things. If white people are beaten on the streets or Muslims go on rampages shouting about Allah, he’ll tell us.

The big thing I want for America is a conservative judiciary. Trump may fail in other regards, but he will probably appoint judges, including one or more Supreme Court justices, who see things correctly. The unborn will get more support, and so will Christians and gun owners. The lunacy of the Obama years may be curbed to some extent. That will be nice.

It’s a mistake to expect too much. I always criticize the left for making government their God, but we do the same thing. If we expect Trump to crush our enemies and make life perfect for us, we’re going to be disappointed. He’s better than Hillary, but he’s still Donald Trump.

By the way, we learned a lot about Republican politicians. We should have known it already. Human nature never changes. Many Republican politicians do not care about America; they proved they care only about their own careers. They put their ambitions and the GOP’s power above the welfare of the United States. They refused to back Trump, and some–including Bush I, Bush II, and Jeb Bush–even opposed him. To oppose the Republican nominee is to oppose a conservative judiciary. To be against Trump is to be for an extreme-leftist Supreme Court. George H.W. Bush, George W. Bush, Jeb Bush, and the rest of the backstabbers showed they care less about America than they do about their own success. Disgraceful. It should be remembered.

Because Trump won, we kept TWO branches of government. The Bushes tried to take both away from us.

I see Hillary hasn’t given her speech of even conceded via Twitter. That’s just the kind of pettiness you would expect from the corrupt Clinton regime. We’ve seen it before.

This is a wonderful morning. My faith is intact. My relationship with God is strengthened, not shaken. From here I have nowhere to go but up. Eschatological double entendre possibly intended.