Perch Guerilla
July 17th, 2009Body Armor Would not Help
I get up in the morning, I make my wonderful, satisfying, minuscule bowl of oatmeal, I sit down at the PC to see what’s happening, and I get this from Marv:
Marv: Marv! Marv! WHOOoooo! Cluck. Cluck. Are you okay? WHOOooo. Mornin’, bird!
How am I supposed to concentrate on email and the Drudge Report? At least Maynard is considerate enough to sulk quietly.
Oh, great. Now he’s starting up. “What are you doing? What are you doing? Maynard bird!”
Birds always make things difficult. I have to take them out of the cage one at a time, or else Marv will be eaten. Night before last I took them out while I watched a DVD. Marv insisted on standing on my pillow, behind my ear. Last night I noticed a spot on the pillow. I wondered if I had some kind of medical thing going on. No, do not be alarmed. It was bird poop. Of course. And I had slept on it the night before. Rubbing my face in it. And my hair.
He was out for half an hour, I made him go at least four times on a newspaper during that time, and he still managed to plant an Improvised Poop Device. I don’t know where it comes from. It’s like he generates it from nothingness. At will.
And I watched him the whole time he was out! I checked the pillow! I knew he was going to do his best to nail that pillow! How did I miss it? It’s like he has a poop cloaking device.
The CIA should train Marvin and turn him loose to poop on bin Laden. He’d find him for sure and get the job done. If he thought there was a peanut in it for him. Then we could follow up with a daisy cutter.
Now Marvin is screaming in Maynard’s voice.
Speaking of bed-related issues, I have learned more stuff about preventing nighttime congestion. It helps if you take out your kitchen trash every night before bed. Unbelievably, stuff that grows in a can far from your bedroom can interfere with your breathing while you sleep. So I guess my once-a-month trash schedule is going to have to be stepped up.
Last thing this morning: please do me a favor and say a prayer for my sister. She’s going in for a medical procedure. Something with her lung. Looks like it’s not all that serious.
Thanks for the help.
July 17th, 2009 at 8:58 AM
A minor procedure looking for some ‘not much to worry about’ sort of thing was how they inadverently found my cancer – and may be why I’m still alive and well.
July 17th, 2009 at 11:08 AM
A minor procedure in the lung can cause great turmoil of the spirit. I will pray for her health and her spirit.
July 17th, 2009 at 2:24 PM
Praying.
July 17th, 2009 at 2:34 PM
Steve I pray for you, your sister, and your dad every night.
My mom goes in on Monday for new stents in her kidney ureters.
God Bless!
July 17th, 2009 at 3:16 PM
Steve and Heather, your people are in my prayers.
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The shooting community here lost a great supporter last night, the father of one our greatest Jr team shooters died. He spent a mint on his boy and donated to the state team as a whole.
July 17th, 2009 at 3:38 PM
Will include your sister in my prayers.
July 17th, 2009 at 7:12 PM
Prayin’
July 17th, 2009 at 8:33 PM
Praying here.
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And hearing of your trials with Marvin gives me more determination to resist the kids when we visit the pet store…
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Any mill updates?
July 18th, 2009 at 4:08 PM
Man, you sucker-punched me there. I was about to do some bird experience comparisons, then I find out about your sister. Hope all is well with her. We’ve lost a lot of people in my family to various cancers, and it’s always because they waited too long. It’s good for her to go in early, even if they it’s not serious. All the best to you and yours. We’ll swap CAG/Cockatoo experiences some other time.
July 20th, 2009 at 8:22 PM
This the least I can do for you. You were gracious enough to post about my sister, Mary Ellen, who by God’s Grace is still with us. She still needs Prayer, is pain all the time and does get confusing in her words. At this time I will lift your Sister up to the Lord, to be with he and comfort her and to Touch her. Thanks for everything, Dan